4.3
June 14, 2011

It’s Gettin’ Real in the Whole Foods Parking Lot.

Update: at only 300 views, we’ve been tipped off and jumped on their latest: Yoga Girl, going viral too!

I predict viral video.

“I’m in electric mode; can’t even hear the engine (sshhhhhhh…..)”

First there was Inappropriate Yoga Guy.

Then there was Illest Buddhist.

Now, there’s a Clipper cap wearing white boy rappin fun at this buster on his iPhone talking to his friends / Picking up some cayenne pepper for his master cleanse…the most annoying dude I’ve ever seen brah…Could you please move, you’re right in front of the Quinoa. And then you put your 6 things for $80 bucks in your mini shopping cart, and you’re off.

Enjoy:

~

Lyrics:

Intro (spoken)

Yo man…
Yo I know you see me here dude!!
I’ve been waiting here like 10 minutes, man!
No, no no… this is MY parking space man.
What you need to do is put your little hybrid in reverse,
And go out the way you came in.
WHAT?!?!
Yo its about to get REAL in the Whole Foods parking lot man…

Chorus (with feeling)

It’s getting’ REAL in the Whole Foods Parking Lot
I got my STEEL and you know it gets sparked a lot
Im on my grind homie… It’s on my mind homie!
These fools with clip boards are lookin’ at me like they know me!

It’s getting’ REAL in the Whole Foods Parking Lot
You know the DEAL with the little shopping carts they got…
Check out what I say, it happens every day…
It’s how we LIVE on the west side of LA!!

Verse 1

… Im ridin’ slow in my Prius…
all leather, tinted windows… you cant see us!!
Everybody’s trying to park, you can feel the tension
I’m in electric mode… can’t even hear the engine (Shhhhhhh)

Just then I saw a spot open up,
My timings perfect… Im creepin’ up…
But then this other dude tried to steal it going the wrong way
Yo man, I’ve had a LONG DAY!

Chorus
(same as before)

Verse 2

Now I’m on this inside, looking at my list
Organic chicken, Kale Salad and a Lemon Twist.
Some girl in yoga pants is lookin at me funny
I’m just trying to find a decent Pinot Noir for under twenty!

Then I take it to the cheese counter, Humboldt Fog?
We just ran out sir! Really Dog?
Take it easy man, I try to calm myself…
I’ve been on edge ever since they took Kombucha off the shelf…

Chorus

(same as before)

Verse 3

This Busters on his iPhone talking to his friends,
Picking up some cayenne pepper for his master cleanse.
You’re the most annoying dude I’ve ever SEEN brah…
Could you PLEASE move? You’re RIGHT in front of the Quinoa.

Damn, I’m about to check out.
Pay my 80 bucks for 6 things and get the heck out.
The express lane is moving hella slow…
Man, these fools don’t know… that shit is getting REAL….

Chorus
(same as before)

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Parkering Kbh Feb 1, 2014 12:47am

Haha, i LOVE this!!

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Waylon Lewis, founder of Elephant Journal & host of Walk the Talk Show with Waylon Lewis, is a 1st generation American Buddhist “Dharma Brat.” Voted #1 in U.S. on twitter for #green two years running, Changemaker & Eco Ambassador by Treehugger, Green Hero by Discovery’s Planet Green, Best (!) Shameless Self-Promoter at Westword’s Web Awards, Prominent Buddhist by Shambhala Sun, & 100 Most Influential People in Health & Fitness 2011 by “Greatist”, Waylon is a mediocre climber, lazy yogi, 365-day bicycle commuter & best friend to Redford (his rescue hound). His aim: to bring the good news re: “the mindful life” beyond the choir & to all those who didn’t know they gave a care. elephantjournal.com | His first book, Things I would like to do with You, touches on modern relationships from a Buddhist point of view. His dream of 9 years, the Elephant “Ecosystem” will find a way to pay 1,000s of writers a month, helping reverse the tide of low-quality, unpaid writing & reading for free online.