It is a challenge for me to watch my little boy go off to school and have conversations, private jokes, and routines that I know very little about. We were always together and I was aware of every minute of his day. Now, I have to hear about something he said or did in his teachers weekly email updates.
Today, while he was at school, (having laughs that I will know nothing about). I went into his room and looked around. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I tried to clear any expectation of what I would see when I opened them again. Often we get so accustomed to seeing the clutter that we no longer actually notice it.
I opened my eyes and observed lots of photographs, chosen and framed by me but I also saw the pictures that he has chosen over time taped up to his chalkboard. The ends were starting to curl and sun was fading the vibrant colors.
I realized, in that moment, that he was becoming his own person, with his own likes and desires and my choices may not suite him any longer.
I pulled down his photographs, dusted some and reprinted others. Then I took the pictures that I picked out of the frames and honored his choices with wood and glass.
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
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Other pieces by Marylee: American Mom, The Princess Of Garbage Day, Sing Out, Clara, and Letter From A Bully.
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