Via Ben Ralston
on Jan 20, 2012
get elephant's newsletter

The other day I wrote this post on my Facebook page:“When we TRUST the world around us, we align ourselves with the natural order. We experience abundance (I’m not talking about money). But when we WORRY, we hold on, and become tense, blocking that natural flow of abundance. Let go. Don’t worry. You have always had everything you needed, and always will. Trust, and be truly joyful”

And an old friend of mine from L.A. asked a great question.  I always love questions (especially such good ones as this) because it opens up a channel of communication from which not only the two of us learn, but also anyone else who is listening. This is how we can grow and evolve: IN RELATIONSHIP. To me that is what questions and answers are–communication, relationship. The stuff of life.

So, here is my friend Joyce’s question:

” What do you mean by “natural order”? i’m asking because i (think) i understand what you mean but then, upon reflection- i’m not quite sure what ‘natural order’ means beyond being born (been there done, that) and dying (eventually, hopefully a ways off)… i’m being simplistic but i really am curious about understanding what you mean by this… moreover, can a ‘natural order’ be pursued in an environment immersed in industry, consumerism, and avarice? a place, like say… los angeles!? i think it’s possible, but it feels like a struggle at times…”

The theme of my original post (the one quoted above) was about  Trust versus Worry. For me, the natural order is what every animal, vegetable and mineral experiences: faith. It is a silent knowing, a deep trusting that everything in life is just as it is meant to be. Even when things go ‘wrong’, there is always a reason. We may not immediately know what that reason is, but we can always look back later and say, “aha, that experience also had a positive effect”.
In English, we have the saying:

“what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”

And one of my favourite singers, Beth Orton, has the wonderful lyric:

“regrets are just lessons you haven’t learnt yet…”


Whatever we think, however we judge a situation, there is always a bigger picture – much bigger than our thoughts and judgements. In fact, if we look at it scientifically, where do thoughts and judgements come from? They come from the frontal cortex part of our brain; the part of our brain that is unique to adult humans. It is very useful, helping us to use language, and analyze the world around us. Without it we wouldn’t have flown to the moon or even invented the wheel. But it is also the part of us that WORRIES. Worry is fear in disguise. Not a very good disguise either. If you worry a lot, it’s because you are afraid. Thoughts, judgements, worries, fear – it’s all in the head.

So if fear and worry is in the head, where is trust? It’s in the body. Trust is in the natural movements of the body: walking, dancing, jumping. It’s in the breath, and the rhythmical expansion and contraction of the lungs. It’s in the flow of blood and energy throughout the body, and the involuntary processes of the internal organs and the digestion.

When you eat a meal, you put the food into your mouth, and then what? Do you have to worry about the food after that? No! The stomach does its job, the intestines do theirs, and finally…! It all happens naturally, spontaneously, and without the need for our attention.

In the same way, the universe and the earth do what they need to do: the planets stay in their orbits, the sun keeps on shining, and the earth keeps up just enough gravity for us to stay here where we belong. Trees give us all the oxygen we need; rains give us all the water we need. There is an abundance of food – more than enough to feed every person on the planet. So why then do we worry so much?

I’ll tell you why:
Because our society has lost touch with: guess what?
Yes, the natural order. We have entered into a battle with nature, trying to manipulate and control it instead of simply trusting. We are afraid that if we let go, something terrible will happen – a new disease, or an earthquake, or a volcano.
And guess what? These things DO happen – it’s just part of life. But honestly, when did any of these things last affect you, and how often does that happen? And more importantly, did worrying about it ever affect a more positive outcome!

So trust! Trust that you will have everything you need. Trust that no matter what happens, there is always a reason. Trust that:

“the only thing we have to fear is fear itself”.

Let your awareness come down, out of your head, and into your body.

The natural order for human beings is this: our energy enters our body deep in the abdomen, in our core. (There is a wisdom there that is ancient, from long before we were human; it is something instinctive and faithful.) That energy flows into our solar plexus, and up, through the heart (our emotional center) and from there into the brain. Our brain is a computer that sorts out the message from the solar plexus and then organizes the necessary action. The brain is like a secretary. It organizes, and it gets things done. But the boss, the manager, the chairman, is deeper down – in gut.

Most people let the secretary make all the decisions – and guess what: the secretary isn’t good at that, it’s not his job, he’s not a natural leader, and so he gets stressed. That stress accumulates, and if you’re not careful, it leads to all kinds of problems. On the other hand, if you bring your awareness down into the body, you focus on feeling more. On being more real, more here, more present. Being aware of the ground beneath your feet, the air in your nostrils, the sounds around you, the life in your body. If you do that, life becomes more joyful because it’s the way we are meant to be. It’s in alignment with the natural order.

It’s not easy because we’ve been conditioned by our society to do the opposite (at school, by our parents, by television, media, advertising, etc). But with practice you gradually eliminate worry and cultivate a feeling of trust.  That trust leads to self-respect, and that respect leads to love. For oneself, for others, and for the world around us.

What could be more natural than that? What is more important?! Is anything really important at all other than this?

To answer the second part of the question: yes, it is possible to live in trust and love surrounded by industry and consumerism and avarice (greed). But it’s REALLY HARD. I think it’s essential to get out of town regularly, back to nature. Like, preferably every day. That’s why I moved to the countryside, and I have to say I could never go back…


Please share it up – spread the love… and comments / questions are always welcome!



About Ben Ralston

Ben Ralston has been practising personal development—necessity being the Mother of invention—since he was about six years old. He’s been teaching and sharing what he’s learnt along the way for a couple of decades. His main thing is Heart of Tribe retreats—whose very purpose is to help you fall back in love with life, no less. Leading these retreats alongside his woman Kara-Leah Grant—also an elephant journal writer (that’s how they met!)—they combine a deep well of lineage-based yoga teaching experience, with expertise in healing trauma and various other methods of personal development. Ben also works with clients one-on-one via Skype, writes, makes videos from time to time, and is passionate about parenting. He lives in an intentional, tribal community in the hills of Croatia, where you might find him gardening barefoot and talking to the rocks. Connect with Ben on Facebook or YouTube or check out his website for more info.


16 Responses to “Trust.”

  1. Lori says:

    Given all that is going on in the world today, with the economy, etc. you have really hit on a key to "weathering" whatever is ahead for all of us, as I suspect, it will include both positive and negative experiences, all of which might be somewhat overwhelming. Nevertheless, such Trust and Faith, are as important as they have ever been, Ben. (: )) So thanks for the reminder. : ))

  2. Eric says:

    'the things of the world agree to every
    minute of the year, every change in season or the weather,
    so that they can go on living.'
    ~Adam Zagajewski

  3. Ben_Ralston says:

    Thanks Eric, nice quote.

  4. Lauren says:

    Thanks, Ben. This has been exactly what I have feeling and saying to myself but it was nice to read your words.

  5. Ben. I am a true fan of your point of view/writing. I speak these words often regarding trust and this article is so nicely put. Thanks for sharing … I will continue to share this as well. Thanks! – Traci Wallace

  6. Ben_Ralston says:

    Thank you Traci. That really means a lot to me. With love 🙂

  7. Ben I loved this, but then I am an avid fan. Thanks for another wonderful, inspiring post.

  8. Ben_Ralston says:

    Thanks Jen. I love you.

  9. Laura says:

    *Liked*, *Recommended*, *Shared*, and LOVED! Thanks, Ben, you are always spot on and one of my favorite Elephants. XO!

  10. Ben_Ralston says:

    Won. Der. Ful.
    Also, can I get some sleep sometime soon please?

  11. Ben_Ralston says:

    Hey Kym,
    This is a really interesting question, and of course who knows?! If I said i did, I'd be pulling your leg. But i can tell you what I *feel*…
    Everything in my life that ever happened that I thought 'bad' (at the time it happened), I later looked back and realized that it was also 'good'.
    So my feeling now is that actually nothing is either good nor bad, it just is. So in a way, we can say that things happen for a reason, but in a way it's also right to say that things just happen. But either way, there is no good or bad.
    My son (picture above) was born by Caesarian, despite that we planned a natural birth for a long time. It was incredibly hard for us all, and the shadow of that time is still a little over us. But I know deep down (I trust) that it was what was best for us all, and for the world around us. I do believe that there is a big picture that we don't see. Shit does just happen, but by believing that it happens for a reason, it makes it easier to deal with – so perhaps it's just a smart thing to believe in?! As you say – so we don't go crazy. Honestly I don't know.
    Victor Frankl's "Man's Search For Meaning" comes to mind…
    And Don Juan (Carlos Castaneda), who says that nothing is a blessing or a curse, but just a challenge.

  12. Ben_Ralston says:

    Being a favorite Elephant is quite an honor. Thank you so much 🙂

  13. […] or ‘mystical’ experiences. My desire to understand everything makes it difficult to rest in the intuitive knowing of ‘God’ or ‘Truth’ or ‘The Universe’ […]

  14. Tracy says:

    I always look forward to your words. There is a calmness in them. Thank you for being such a beautiful spirit. ~One Love~