July 30, 2012

Fear is Not Your Friend. ~ Jack Elias

In Part 1, we discussed:

    1.  Confusion about desire vs. attachment

    2.  Limited self-concepts.

In Part 2, we will look at the unrecognized nature of fear-based thinking and confusion about cause and effect.

3)  Unrecognized Nature of Fear-Based Thinking.

Fearful thoughts are a stand-alone energy drain.

They never help, so why do we embrace them? We think we need them to have critical thinking, for one thing—“There are bad things in the world to be afraid of. You can’t be a fool about it!”

Yes, there are bad things in the world, and you don’t want to be a fool. But discrimination is what you need, not fear.


Fear freezes your brain, clouds your perceptions, and prevents you from coming up with creative solutions for dealing with the bad things. Discrimination supports clear perception, flexibility, cheerful perseverance, and creativity so you can do your best to meet the challenge.

Fear-based thinking always leads you in the wrong direction.

It is never your friend.

A long time ago, I attended a real estate seminar where the very successful presenter said something that served me well from that moment to this day.

Someone asked him how he kept his perspective and sense of direction when things got tough and very risky.

He said, “I’m not sure how I knew this, but I had the certainty that I should always go in the opposite direction from what fear was telling me.”

Wow! Try that on for awhile; it deserves contemplation.

Fearful thoughts are a put down, not a protection.

The hidden message in fearful thinking is that you are weak and unsupported, and that you will not meet some vague performance standard and therefore, live in a dire state forever.

I have found in every case working with clients, that these fearful beliefs are projections of gullible mistaken ideas formed in childhood in response to what parents taught or withheld from their children. In varying degrees of intensity we all “learn” to believe that we don’t have a right to make a mistake, that we have to live to please others rather than follow our own inner guidance, and that “failure” in these areas will expose our unworthiness. Clearly, fear-based thinking is a put down!

We do have the right to learn from our mistakes without shame, guilt, or fear of others opinions. We are here to live our own lives from our own inspirations, not to perform to make others happy.

Fear keeps us from acting on what we “know.”

I am imagining you are reading this and thinking, “I know that, these ideas are very familiar and simple.” But do you “know” them functionally?

Do you act with awareness of your absolute right to present yourself fully and enthusiastically to the world, ready to share your gifts and interests, your feelings, and to receive others?

If your answer is a vigorous “Yes!” then you are very fortunate—you are not in the snare of fear-based thinking.

If you answer is a qualified “yes” or a “no” then I invite you to examine your assumptions about the world and your place in it with a sword of discrimination in your hand ready to cut through fearful thinking!

4) Confusion About Cause and Effect.

Every time we make a move, we are motivated by a desire, resolution, intention, or inspiration (let’s call these “beginnings”).

Every beginning gives rise to a goal, the fulfillment of the desire or inspiration.

Often, wonderful beginnings do not end at the wonderful goal.

I am sure you have heard the saying, “The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.” I’m sure you have also heard the New Age aphorism, “You always make the best choice.” Or the age old, “Everyone just wants to be happy.”

Photo: Alex Bellink

Have you ever wondered why things can turn out so badly if you always have a good intention, make your best choice, and just want to be happy?

The answer is that you didn’t accurately understand how the laws of cause and effect were operating in the given situation.

The “Law of Cause and Effect” is operating in an all pervasive, unimpeded, and unrelenting way. It is totally reliable and impartial. If you act in accord with it, results are guaranteed!

When we make our very first move to act on our “beginning,” we are making a statement of trust in the law of cause and effect and an affirmation that we understand how to apply it to get the outcome we want.

But we often forget or don’t realize that any action we take represents such a statement and affirmation.

When we don’t appreciate that we subconsciously trust and recognize the law of cause and effect, we forget to pay attention to it action by action.

This is important because, action by action, the law of cause and effect (LCE) gives us feedback about the action(s) we have taken—feedback that lets us know of any course corrections we need to make, and also additional knowledge about the nature of the project in general.

When we forget that we must attend to the impartial feedback from the LCE, we get into big trouble. If we don’t pay attention to the actual LCE, we invent our own version of what we want the LCE to be.

Living by our desired LCE produces these delusions:

  • >>I’m a victim of circumstance.
  • >>The universe is out to get me.
  • >>This shouldn’t be happening to me or “Why me?!”
  • >>It’s hopeless; there is no way out.
  • >>I am unworthy to have any good come into my life.
  • >>Nothing ever works out.
  • >>It’s not my fault; it’s your fault.

Simply put, when we forget that the LCE is impersonal, impartial, reliable, and all pervasive, we delude ourselves thinking the LCE is personal, unreliable, and “patchy” in its application.

This enables us to indulge in victim mentality, believing that whining and complaining will somehow produce a good outcome. Or that actions determine the worth of our being.

If however, you appreciate the true nature of LCE, you always make an effort to engage with life moment by moment, in a positive constructive way with an inner sense of self-encouragement, self-love, and patience.

You don’t do this to be a good boy or good girl. You do it because you know that the LCE is reliable and that ‘like comes from like’. If you want good in your life, constantly plant seeds of good—mentally, emotionally and physically.

If life brings you something you don’t like, you don’t complain (you may feel sad, which is very different). You meet it with interest (to learn more about LCE), with enthusiasm (because you know your worthiness is not at stake), and with patience (because you are clear that fear, masquerading as impatience, is never your friend).

You see that absurdity of acting in a negative way if something negative show up—adding a negative response just plants seeds for more negativity to bear fruit!

When you understand these insights about LCE, whatever comes, you smile at it. Not because you are faking that you like it, but because whatever comes reminds you of your own inner value and resourcefulness, and that the real LCE is on your side.

Results are guaranteed! Develop the habit of planting positive seeds—mentally, emotionally, and physically—even in the face of negative circumstances (the result of prior negative actions—no blame—just the action of the LCE) and positive results must come to you.

Good luck!


This blog was reviously posted at http://blog.findingtruemagic.com. Permission to reprint for Elephant Journal.


Jack Elias is founder and director of The Institute for Therapeutic Learning and author of Finding True Magic: Transpersonal Hypnosis & Hypnotherapy/NLP. For over 45 years, Jack has studied Eastern meditation, philosophy and psychology with masters such as Shunryo Suzuki Roshi and Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche. He presents a unique synthesis of Eastern and Western perspectives on the nature of consciousness and communication, teaching simple yet powerful techniques for achieving one’s highest personal and professional goals. Jack offers trainings, coaching, and private counseling to an international clientele.  [email protected]


Editor:  April Dawn Ricchuito

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