August 2, 2012

The Magic in Kindness.

Photo by Podengo

Is kindness a daily visitor or permanent houseguest in your life?

Kindness is an essential to living, just like eating and sleeping.

Do we practice actual kindness regularly? It’s not about “being nice” (to do something for someone so they “think” we are wonderful or to get something in return), but being kind.

Kindness does not mean giving in or handing out, it opens the heart and quiets the mind.

In being and sharing kindness, you stand for yourself, but are mindful of the point of view and needs of others.

In a relationship, having the common goal as kindness, means less self-imposed guilt.

Kindness doesn’t succeed under self-flagellation. If you are into kicking yourself every five minutes for a perceived mistake or analyzing the crap out of everything you do, kindness will continue to elude you.

When you punish you, it punishes the rest of the world too.

It’s a cruel cycle.

And makes for a pretty unkind mood too.

Finding kind eyes in this world should be a daily pursuit, which starts when you wake up and look in the mirror.

Be kind.

Think about how genuinely good it feels when someone is kind.

When someone asks our opinion, opens our door, smiles at us, hugs us, shows up when we need that shoulder, listens, loves, and is open-heartedly in our corner—it always shifts our energy to a more positive state.

Many of us are surprised when someone does something from the heart; we may not know how to respond or even trust it because authentic care and loving kindness may have been withheld from us.

All we have to do is bask in the glow of their kindness. We all love to know what we give is welcome, even if not a word of appreciation is ever stated….

“Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.” ~ Lao Tzu

Kindness in words creates confidence:

Be aware of your words. Are they designed to win, crush the opponent and give you a moment of feeling righteous or superior?

Do they steal your confidence or feed feelings of wholeness?

Photo by U.S. National Archives and Records Administration

When you speak to someone else are your words chosen with respect, value and honor for the other person and yourself?

There are no instances in this world that even the most painful things you need to say shouldn’t be uttered without kindness. No matter what words you choose, connect with the truth in your heart and soul. It makes it easier before your mind becomes involved in what you speak. Use your words kindly.

Kindness in thinking creates profoundness:

We have thousands of thoughts a day.

What if you were to only “act upon” kind thoughts? How would that change your day or even your life?

What about those game-changing kind thoughts that require a “leap of faith” or an “act of courage” to implement because they are so far out of your comfort zone?

Kindness in giving creates love:

Such a beautiful sentiment.

When you give from the heart, you receive love in return. Even if the source of love is different than where you have given. Giving from the heart not the head is “truth in action.” Anytime you deny giving to another person when you really, really want to from your heart, you put up a wall to creating love. Use kindness as a gift.

Denial and kindness do not operate from the same roots. When we are kind to ourself, we are mindful of our energy, wants and needs. We respect our own boundaries and others.

Kindness does not coexist in tandem with denial as its partner.

Denial does not create ease, comfort and happiness because it is disingenuous. And it takes many forms, from outright abuse, to disconnecting, making false promises and anything else, which takes real kindness and replaces it with being “nice.”

Nice means to inauthentically commit to another through the “outward” appearance of the act of giving or doing, which oftentimes is meant to exceed expectations and break through the sound barrier. There is a sense of obligation, duress or manipulation involved in anything “nice.”

Photo by Tracy Crossley

Kindness, on the other hand, can be given through a sense of responsibility with a “clear” heartfelt understanding. It may be stressful when we commit to an act of kindness it may be at a huge inconvenience, but it feels good in your heart to provide.

Kindness is not given to “get” anything.

Niceness requires appreciation; kindness has appreciation in the seed of its origin.

To be compassionate is to be kind.

Forgiveness is also a form of kindness.

And it isn’t just directed to others, it’s directed inward to our own healing. Kindness is healing. It is self-love as an action word!

Awareness of your thoughts and how they affect your moods, allows you to change your perception. We can pick and choose the thoughts we want to turn into a belief. Choose your kindest thoughts and take action. You will start to feel happier and more peaceful.

Kindness in action is a launching pad for dreams coming true. As you are kind, watch how good you feel. Good enough to capture dreams?

Try more “kindness” at least a couple of times a day, even if you practice it now and see the difference in how you feel.

You’ll end up feeling more peaceful, whole, connected, loved and believing that you do matter all from just a few “acts” of genuine kindness.


Editor: Brianna Bemel


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