What Does it Mean to Stand in your Power?

Via Dianne Bondy
on Sep 26, 2012
get elephant's newsletter



I’m just coming down from an emotional life-evolving summer.

It was by far the most challenging summer for me personally and professional.

I decided to make a change in my life; to take a leap and broaden my horizons. To do that, I needed to find my courage. I needed to stand more powerfully. I was confused for most of my life, I have let people take advantage and use me. I allowed myself to be less then who I was. I often give away my power too freely.

People who I thought were friends, and even yogis, took it willingly as I gave it away. I can’t be angry with them, I allowed it to happen. My friends pointed it out to me but I was still blind. But now as I stand at the tail end of 2012, I have come to realize what I need to do to.

Stand more powerfully. Stand for truth, stand for integrity, stand for what I believe in and stand for what works for me.

I need to be courageous…what does that mean? My new Yoga Bestie Michelle Marchildon speaks about a Fearless Heart in her book Finding More on the Mat. I’m going to get me one of those fearless hearts. Life lessons tell me I need this. I need to really find my courage. It starts first with observing the world around me. It’s an abundant world so we need not be hoarders. We must not take what is not ours, and we must not take it all!

Don’t hoard or grasp at something. If you hold on too tight you lose your power. Grasping and hoarding is a symptom of insecurity. Insecurity creates fear, and fear contributes to powerlessness.

Don’t get me wrong, fear can be a gift. There’s a difference between fear that keeps us safe from harm, and fear that keeps us from living a full life. Being afraid of sky diving or bungee jumping may be valid.  The fear that lives in our imagination, the fear that limits our existence is not valid. We must work to overcome it.

Have the courage to let go and have faith that the Universe is abundant.

I am not as smart as, as well read as, or as educated as someone I know and admire. Therefore I am less then whole, not as good or as worthy.

That’s crazy talk, and intellectually I know it, but there is still part of me that believes it.

What I’m striving for now is balance. Balance is stability, and stability is powerful! I always have choices. I can choose to be taken advantage of, I can choose who to be friends with, I can choose how to react to situations, and this is where we find power. Every time I come to a place were I feel shaky, how do I shift my thinking to create balance and power. I ask myself, “What can I do in moment to change the way I am feeling?”

I can breath, I can observe and I can do things that makes strong. I can practice gratitude for the moment. This moment is a learning opportunity. What can I learn from this experience so that it doesn’t happen again? How I can feel more powerful?  This is an opportunity to become more skillful.

Much of feeling powerful is wrapped up in how we feel about ourselves. Practicing self love is the first step to empowerment. If you love yourself deeply you will stand tall in your life and you will treat others with respect.

“How we treat ourselves in truth is how we treat those around us.”~ Deborah Adele

As I create a more powerful me. I will embrace all the things that make me courageous and help me to stand in my power.

Observing these five things truthfully will make me more skillful and powerful in my life. If you feel this share it and do the same:

1. Gratitude: thanking my life experience for showing me what I need and what I don’t want.
2. Compassion: is knowing that I can’t help everyone. Trying to do what I think is best for people steals their power
3. Balance: I cannot do everything and I must take care of myself first.
4. Truthfulness: live and stand with integrity. I need to really own my shit.
5. Do not steal or take advantage of others: Think about your actions

“travel light, spread light, be the light”


Editor: Kate Bartolotta

Like elephant spirituality on Facebook.


About Dianne Bondy

Dianne is an E-RYT 500 the founder of Yogasteya.com, and Co-founder of Yoga for All Online Teacher Training yogaforalltraining.com. She loves to educate, share, celebrate yoga and diversity and is a contributing author for Yoga and Body Image: A New anthology. She is also featured in Yes Yoga Has Curves and Yoga Journal. She is a columnist for the Elephant Journal, loves public speaking, runs yoga retreats, trains yoga teachers, has a devoted husband, two small boys and not enough sleep. Dianne is big, black, bold and loves all things yoga. Try to keep up with Dianne on Facebook, Twitter, and DianneBondyYoga.com instagram or download one of her FREE podcast on iTunes


10 Responses to “What Does it Mean to Stand in your Power?”

  1. Hi Dianne,

    I really enjoyed reading your article. To be so open and real with your insecurities reveals your power. Our insecurities defeat us when we hide them and empower us when we own them. Realizing and staking our claim on where we are emotionally, spiritually and physically is the true beginning for authentic growth. I believe when we are vulnerable, and not afraid to own it, we are most powerful. To maintain one’s sense of self and purpose in the midst of a free fall is powerful. To see the value in self care is powerful. To be accountable is powerful. Keep up the beautiful work.


  2. Dianne says:

    Jamie thank you for the read. I have been really struggling on figuring things out for a while. I have been so hurt and putting out there is the path to healing. Your kind words inspire me. I am a work in progress….Thank you for sharing

  3. Jane says:

    Hi Dianne, beautifully said. Loving ourselves is so important to our health, mentally and physically. And that takes acceptance and celebration of whoever we are and whatever we can/cannot do. By looking to the outside for our answers when we're feeling insecure, we will ultimately lead ourselves astray. The same happens when we watch ourselves through others eyes. We don't see who we are inside.
    I hope you know that you have so many friends who have your back. Love you sweet Dianne. I'll see you in November.

  4. Dianne says:

    Thank you Jane. I love you and miss you. Thank you for your insights; it is always such a struggle. I feel so strong sometimes and then the smallest thing derails me and I get a creeping sense of insecurity and fear. It is so strange. I know better but my past gets the better of me. I thought I would put it out there and see what comes up..am I alone in my feelings..clearly not. I am so blessed to be support by all of you. Thank you for your love

  5. Michelle Marchildon says:

    Dianne, you are an inspiration. Stand tall girl. You show us how to do it. Having a fearless heart doesn't mean you don't fail. A fearless heart has been broken many times before, but a fearless heart always comes back for more. Right? Love you.

  6. […] One of those days where everything seems to be challenging you and teaching you…and trying to … […]

  7. Ann says:

    Thank you Dianne! Much needed words for this time in my life and I am grateful that you so openly shared your experience, strength and hope. <3

  8. Dianne says:

    A fearless heart has resilience and persistence. Thanks for the love …you are an inspiration. Just wading through this stuff.

  9. Dianne says:

    Big love to you Ann. Thanks for reading the blog. It`s been a blessing to write about it. Blessings to you

  10. Anoyn says:

    Michelle Marchildon is one of the most hateful people I have ever encountered — the one in Denver right? You need to run from her to find your power