January 9, 2013

Managing the Money I Don’t Have. ~ Edith Lazenby

 I am broke; I am not alone.

I live in a metropolitan area which is much less depressed than say Oregon, where my sister lives. I work often; my husband has a steady job but has had several health challenges over the past few years.

Hence, we’re broke.

In fact, if prayer could pay my mortgage, maybe we’d own this house.

Truth is, I am hoping a gig comes through so we can pay the mortgage this month.

I talk to my neighbors; they’re broke too. I joke about paying bills on time, but many of us don’t, because we can’t. If I said I didn’t worry, I’d be lying. But then, you cannot get blood from a stone and you cannot pay a bill if there’s nothing in the bank.

I have five dollars in my savings account and I am 53-years-old.

How did this happen? The story involves more than I wish to tell, to anyone, but obviously we have not managed what we have, when we have it well.

I have a full freezer. I have an iPhone. We have cable.

My brother is dumbfounded.

Yet, my husband only watches sports. The iPhone may seem like a luxury but I use it for my work as a yoga teacher and for elephant journal. In fact, I have been known to say the iPhone is the best thing made since god [note small “g” just in case someone is listening].

How does this happen?

I do what I love, but I have no job security; my husband has back and knee issues, had a hernia, had a major sinus infection one year….it’s always something, it seems.

But somehow we manage. Come hell or high water, as my Southern mom would say, we make it.

One friend used tell me there is always a way to save. And though I did not take it well, she was right, in that we had other ways to cut back spending.

However, when it’s not coming in, there’s little to be done.

We have no safety net. It’s scary—and yet, compared to the rest of the world we’re fine. Compared to many in the United States, we are fine.

We only have ourselves to feed and our cats. I have work. We have health insurance. My husband will eventually get a disability check.

But I must say I did not want to be here again, so soon. Last summer was the worst and now this…and we’ve nothing left to sell, except maybe my wedding ring.

What would you give up to keep your home, your livelihood and your way of life?


I am a full time yoga teacher, trained at City Fitness in Washington, DC and Willow Street Yoga Center in Silver Spring, Maryland. I have been writing poetry since I was nine years old. Poetry is my first love and yoga continues to feed my heart. I write because I love it. I teach because I love it. I tell my students all the time: do it because you can. That works for me. I believe in creating opportunity. I believe in helping my self and others. I think faith is the most important gift of life, because when we lose everything else we still have that in our heart. I believe the natural state of being is happiness, or bliss, or Ananda. Life is a celebration. Poetry and yoga help me celebrate. Check out my blog and website here..

Like elephant Work & Money on Facebook.


Ed: Bryonie Wise



(Source: Uploaded by user via Gabriella on Pinterest)




Read 3 Comments and Reply

Read 3 comments and reply

Top Contributors Latest

Edie Lazenby  |  Contribution: 20,715