Unrequited Sex.

Via Freya Watson
on Apr 17, 2013
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‘So, what would you like to work on?’ he asked kindly as part of a pre-session screening.

‘Oh, there’s nothing in particular—I was just curious,’ I smiled back, confident in my sexuality and self-expressiveness. I just wanted to experience the bodywork he had to offer—sexological bodywork—but had no neurosis or wounding to work on, as far as I knew. I had already done a considerable amount of healing in the area of sexuality and felt at home in my skin. But later that night, as I looked at the rarely-consecrated double bed, and felt a familiar sadness rise inside, it hit me.

My sexuality had become a burden, a source of sorrow.

That was my ‘issue’ if I had one. Unrequited sexuality.

I don’t need to be told that sexuality is a gift. I know that it is, intimately. I’ve experienced the highs of what it can bring. I understand how it can touch the soul and body in ways that are truly unique. And I have no difficulty in pleasuring myself fully, deeply and honestly. I’ve even written volumes on the subject! No, comfort with my own sexuality wasn’t an issue, but the sadness that I’d come to associate with it definitely was. Too many months of getting into bed with someone who had little interest in sexual sharing had started to lay down a pattern of association between sexual desire and sadness at a lack of reciprocation. It was an association I could certainly live without.

Ultimately, no matter how comfortable and alive we feel in our individual sexuality, sharing it with another brings a richness which can’t be experienced alone. We can reach depths of fulfillment and pleasure with a partner which are difficult to achieve alone. Sexuality, by its very nature, is intended to be shared, and when two people have a shared understanding and approach to their sexual intimacy, it enhances their lives individually and together in ways that are hard to describe to those that have yet to experience the territory. It was territory I had been familiar with, but to which I had been a stranger for several years.

My long-term partner had, for various reasons, lost interest in sex, relegating it to the ‘once in a while, when I’m in the mood’ part of his life (reasons for which this article is too short to cover). But my predicament, if I can call it that, would have been the same had I been single.

The opportunities for finding another who matched my understanding and energy were slim.

The gift of my sexuality, which I had once treasured, was now feeling more like a burden that I wanted rid of, something which nagged at me continually, reminding me of its presence and of its continual, unfulfilled, desire for shared expression.
I sat with the sorry realization for a while that evening, letting the full sadness of it wash over me. How many others feel like this, I wondered. Is this how men feel when their partners give them the cold shoulder, night after night, or just go through the motions to shut them up? No wonder they get to feeling there’s something wrong with their sexuality, and then end up acting accordingly. And what about other women?

Surely I wasn’t the only hot-blooded, spiritually-minded, woman on the planet who was short a good match?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/17006107@N00/2277196121
Photo: Lianne Viau

How did they manage, given that an unwilling male partner has a much harder time (pun not intended) just going through the motions?

As I sat there, though, I began to see that it wasn’t just about a lack of sexual action. It never is, is it? If that’s all it was, then I could easily have started hanging around the local night-clubs or paying a gigolo (budget permitting!). No, it was more than that. What I was missing was a partner who could open his heart wide enough, and with sufficient passion, to love me fully through his body, and who would be comfortable receiving my open, loving sexuality in return. Around me it seemed as if there were many who might be willing to have sex with me, and others who might give open-hearted loving a try, but there were few who combined both. And so, I had been carrying around this wonderful gift that I was longing to give, but with no-one to receive it.

My bodyworker did his best to help me release the sadness that had built up inside, working his magic on where it lay buried in the cells of my body, and reconnecting me to the natural joy that sexuality inherently carries when we come to it from a place of innocence. What he couldn’t do, though, was guarantee me someone who could and would reciprocate my gift of loving, intimate, sexuality, or promise that I wouldn’t feel the sadness return another day.

In the time since then, I’ve regularly received comments and messages in response to articles I’ve written, from readers who refer to the difficulty of finding a partner who matches their desire to share deep intimacy and sexuality. Most of the comments have been from men and, although I’m obviously a woman, I have to assume that perhaps it is more of a male issue. Or perhaps the women are just not speaking out as much? I prefer to see it as a genderless issue, though—as something that relates more to a certain type of person rather than to a particular gender. It certainly, although not exclusively, seems to be more common among those who have done a degree of personal growth work and have reached a level of maturity in themselves.

What the solution to this is, particularly when living within an area that has a small population, I’m not sure. Living in an urban area with a denser population, the opportunities to find a like-minded/hearted/bodied partner is presumably greater than it is in a rural or small community. But my experience of both bliss and frustration with this topic has led me to two main conclusions, both of which seem obvious but deserve elaborating on.

The first is that those of us who are comfortable in our sexuality have a role to play in helping to bring others to a similar place.

Even if we have no interest in doing so professionally, we can do this in our intimate relationships by being sensitive to our lovers’ needs and concerns, by patiently and compassionately supporting their own sexual explorations. Also, by taking the time to articulate how it is for us—how we feel about our sexuality, our pleasure, our bodies and our love of sharing those—we have a chance to ‘mentor’ our lovers into being better able to meet us deeply in a sexual encounter, to our mutual benefit.

This role as voluntary teacher and guide can also be done in broader circles, with friends and acquaintances. We can gently challenge commonly-accepted views we many not agree with as they appear in conversations around us—the ones that suggest that wanting sex is wrong, that wanting more sex than a partner does is wrong, that seeking satisfaction outside a relationship is wrong, that self-pleasuring is something to be embarrassed about, and so many more. Allowing these to be perpetuated, by staying silent out of a fear of rejection, isn’t of benefit to anyone. By contributing to a greater understanding and awareness around sexuality, we are helping to create a world in which sexuality is expressed more naturally and in which our gift of deep sexuality can be more readily received.

The second conclusion I’ve come to is that we need to speak up more clearly about what we need—to be willing to show ourselves openly for who we are and what we want, while accepting that others may not be in a position to reciprocate or even accept.

For me, what I need in my life is a deep sexual sharing which allows me to flow my energy fully with another. And I know there are others for whom this is also true, although they may not be as comfortable or as articulate in asking for it.

It’s not just about frequency of sex, it’s about quality, connection, depth and love.

Sometimes saying that this is what I’m looking for makes me feel like a starving beggar complaining that the bread she has been given is white rather than the fresh, seeded, whole-grain loaf that she needs to stay healthy. After all, shouldn’t I be happy with what I’m getting? And it’s not that I can’t derive pleasure from more casual, less-connected, sex. I can, and do, and it’s fun—the same way having white bread is nice once in a while but doesn’t form the basis for a healthy diet. It doesn’t really hit the mark. And it certainly doesn’t leave me with that sense of having shared a fulfilling, life-enhancing, meaningful connection with another—which is what deep, loving sexuality can bring at its best.

None of this is offered from a place of judgment, no matter how the story and my limited attempts at articulating a sensitive subject may seem. I’m neither wrong nor right for wanting what I do, nor would I consider those with different needs to be either right or wrong. We all are who we are, and we all have individual needs, desires and sexual histories that need to be taken into account—differing levels of sensitivity and of sexual desire, different forms of sexual expression, different rates of arousal, and different experiences of early sexuality. Being able to address, integrate and play around with all of these is part of making a relationship work, and being open to our individual uniqueness can prevent sex becoming a bland neutral where each person dumbs down what they really want.

So, those two conclusions aside, how do I continue to live right here, right now, without easy access to that deep nourishment which I feel I need? Like others do, I guess.

I take the opportunities for intimacy as they present themselves, whether within my long-term relationship or outside of it, and I make the most of them.

I focus on loving what I’ve got in my life—and I certainly have plenty. And I continue to offer the gifts I have to offer, knowing that they don’t always find a home but that it feels better to offer anyway than to hold back. I also make the most of those talented souls who offer touch and love as their professional services to the world. I may choose to be fussy about the quality of the intimacy I need, but I’ve had to become open to the way in which it may offer itself to me or live without.

 

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Ed: Kate Bartolotta

Photo: Jenn Slade

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About Freya Watson

How we ground our heart-felt truths into the everyday experience of relationships, work and family is the foundation for a lot of my work. Finding our 'truth' is a challenge in itself, but living it day to day is an even bigger challenge. My books are available on Amazon and you can also find me on Facebook and read more on my blog.

Comments

96 Responses to “Unrequited Sex.”

  1. Leslie says:

    I read this article….and the subsequent comments….and all I could do was cry. Partly just for the fact of finally feeling seen, and understood. Someone else feels this, too! A bit out of sadness for people (especially women) who feel this deep need, and feel ashamed for needing and wanting what we know we need. Mostly, though, out of relief at having finally…..after many years of silent disappointment and frustration and pain….finding a man who shares this need for deep connection. It's a beautiful thing when it happens! I hope you will find it all again, someday, in one place.

  2. Arista says:

    Beautiful. You communicated something I didn't have the words to express. Lump in throat. X

  3. richie says:

    He's right. And some of us are even single with lots of cherishing to give.

  4. Freya Watson says:

    I love that we all come at it from different perspectives, and sometimes our stories match up and sometimes they don't. I enjoyed reading your thoughts here.

  5. Rebecka says:

    Beautiful. Thank you for sharing your journey! I know how you feel. It is not just a male issue. For certain, intimacy is very important to happiness. Our opportunities to experience it seem greater and lesser all at the same time. We have more means of connecting and less understanding of how to connect deeply. Blessings of abundant intimacy my sister.

  6. david says:

    Hell, I'd be happy for some intimacy… Sex seems too simple.

  7. joyful2806 says:

    WOW thank you for posting this. After a failed marriage with little sex or love, I found him – I had a wonderful man who gave me the sex, intimacy and love I craved. Then after two years he abused that position, he cheated, lied, let other women into his bed, played so many mind games that I had to walk away for my own mental health if nothing else. Your post brought up a lot of empty, hollow feelings I have at my empty bed that I keep squashed down as I have truly given up on relationships.

  8. quilless says:

    Thanks for reminding me to keep looking… 🙂

  9. Matthew says:

    Beautiful article. I want to ask, what I can do as a man to better reciprocate these feelings. Or maybe I am already doing so but my partner doesn't respond, or does not want to communicate. Basically I found this article, as well as elephant journal when my partner liked this article on facebook. So I wanted to see what it was about. Not sure how to take it. I like to be open about anything in a relationship, especially sex. What can I do as a man in order to better give back. is what I guess I am trying to ask. I do my best in the bedroom and I like to please. We only see each other maybe three or four times a month, the relationship I guess is strange one. She doesn't want to fully commit and I am fine with that. There are times when she pulls back and doesn't want to talk or see me. I wonder what fault am I in this whole process. Maybe I shouldn't be typing this but I am just looking for answers.

  10. lucy says:

    Yes, all I can say is yes, this reminds me of what I've felt just under my skin for years now. I keep trying to work on the things that have kept me from experiencing the connection I ache for. I've learned to appreciate the spark of love I sometimes experience in a hug, a genuine smile that comes from someone's eyes, a thoughtful gesture. But reading this, I don't feel so alone anymore.

  11. Anonymous says:

    This is a heartbreaking article and hit home. As someone who long ago rejected my immigrant parents' values towards sex and relationships with tremendous guilt and self-inflicted pain, to many years later be in a loving, monogamous, but sexless relationship, I have often felt the same burden the author feels. Life would be simpler if we didn't need sex, we didn't have different appetites and we didn't have a social code that determined with whom sex was appropriate. But life isn't that simple and one learns to let go of what one can't have. That may mean letting go of monogamy for one person or letting go of sex for another or letting go of a relationship for a third. Those of us in this situation are all going to have to make our own choices on what to let go of and hope for the best.

  12. Amy says:

    Thank you for this article. My 13 year marriage is ending because I was tired of being constantly rejected physically. He is a good man but I need that connection. I’m not sure being single is the solution but I can no longer take the sadness. I felt I was alone in that feeling and have a tremendous amount of guilt related to it, but this article showed me there are many of us out there that feel the same way. I have never cried so hard reading an article.

  13. Rarelight says:

    I love this article. I don't find many men or women that understand. They'll jokingly ask if I'm a nympho. No .. Lonely , but not from being alone. I enjoy my solitude often.. It's the deep sharing of energy I long for, human touch with openess..curiosity, allowing. I've had delicious glimpses and I want it all. Not a hook up, not just orgasm. A deep connection. Thank you for sharing. Speaking on my behalf. I will find the right man.

  14. Jenna B. Wiser says:

    I’m all about finding the right person that you can be fully open about your needs and desire and “mentoring” them. However, I would never be happy in a relationship with someone who doesn’t value a commitment enough to feel like its ok to “take other opportunities whether in a long term relationship or not and makes the most if them.” That cavalier attitude in a committed relationship is not something I would ever want. No true intimacy in that. Maybe that’s the difference between a southern and northern girl.

  15. M says:

    Rechannelling energy to the heart through Taoist practices instead of masturbation which depletes bodies reserves and can lead to empty craving later, honoring body, being creative, and meeting a partner who recycles his seed so have more desire than me even, but more than that actually into me have desire and patient enough to really feel me as a person, and also listen to my body because he honor and listen to his, really helped me.

  16. BusyBeingMe says:

    THANK YOU!

    As a woman who believes she is articulate and intelligent, I hadn’t been able to find the words. Your (our) story resonated so deeply, that it has brought me to tears. I am grateful that I am not alone in this feeling.

    Additionally as a queer woman, I have only once before experienced this connection so completely. I do not long for that lover as we are better friends now than we were partners. But it does allow me to see that I too must be forward and share my gifts even if they do not find an immediate home; I speak of being open and not of sleeping around. Having sex is easy, its readily available but that connection that brings you to your spirit is what I will have again.

    Thank you for giving voice to what sat in darkness in my spirit. I am grateful.

  17. Carli Susu says:

    Thank you for that. Perfectly articulated how I feel. I am generally ‘in love’ with myself, but after a long bout of solo-dom, I feel frustration at my inability

    to snap my fingers and conjure up a sexual, passionate and connected partner. D.I.Y. just isn’t the same. More depressingly, I DO live in a vibrate, urban populated city, and it still hasn’t increased my chances of finding a lover. I sometimes think, in my darker moments that, surely with 7 billion plus souls on the planet, there must be just one perfect for me? A connection of mind, body and soul. Just one please!

    I started this note stating that I do appeciate and love myself, but on deeper analysis, and after such a long time in single mode, I begin to question my worth. Certainly, I am not of conventional, Vogue beauty. I am curvey, well, ok, a bit plump, no longer in the prime of my life and dreadlocked. But surely amongst all the billions of people here, one will find my unique beauty aappealing and want to make the two headed beast with me?

  18. Brad says:

    As a spiritually awakened man, this is amazing to see the same desire in others that I have within myself, and a similar sense of unfulfillment by living without this kind of deep connection. With the rules always changing within my new consciousness of living in the 5D now, I find myself deeply desiring this kind of deep, real connection with a woman, but without loosing my personal freedom and personal identity as an individual. Ideally, I feel that my ideal spiritual relationship would be loving each other fully in the moment, but still living individual lives, and being happy and fulfilled in those moments as well. I've experienced the "merging" of identities and the clingy, addictive attachments that too often come along with really deep sexual connection, and long for a balance of all these attributes without one or the other partner feeling like an addict on a roller coaster, miserable without the high, suffering the neediness when trying to live one's life as an individual. A pipe dream? Perhaps, but I'm developing this level of independent strength within myself and look forward to meeting a match in the future 🙂

  19. Suzette says:

    Wow..I could have written this piece, not as well, but felt it was me! I chose to step out of my relationship. There I found someone that I can share true deep intimacy and love on a level that I have never known.

  20. Tina says:

    I had thought all of this for a long time for myself but it is so nice to see it in someone else's words. I am now single and trying to put my sexuality back together. I know now it is better to be alone than feel unwanted and not fully embraced for every part of my being. Thank you for sharing.

  21. You (and others in similar situation) may want to read "Sex At Dawn" for some insight into this pattern. Challenging, but essential, for any real sexual healing to be cultivated….

  22. Maggie McReynolds says:

    "Everyone" is not afraid of vulnerability, actually, but it reveals so much about you when you say you think so. See how I did that? It's easy to read another's writing, pick out phrases, threads, even whole sentences and paragraphs, and turn them into some kind of damning evidence that proves whatever working theory you've got going. I can promise you that if you start with the premise that a writer, any writer, is a coward and and a narcissist and hiding behind spiritual jargon, there's really nothing that writer can say to convince you otherwise. It's a "when did you stop beating your wife" kind of attack.

    Unless I'm misunderstanding you, if I, hypothetically, were to write that I am committed to being honest, vulnerable, authentic–insert spiritual aspiration here–I would be "giving the game away" and showing that I am not honest about any of those things. I would just somehow BE those things, without writing about them.

    Except that would make me a pretty boring writer.

    I don't know, maybe my own buttons are getting pushed here. I dated a man, long ago, whose father used to goad him and verbally abuse him as a teenager to the point of tears and helpless anger, and then say something like, "See? You know you're in the wrong. You wouldn't be so upset and feeling defensive if you didn't know in your heart that I'm right and you're wrong."

    Your posts remind me of this jabbing. Abuse and judgment disguised as insightful commentary.

    And maybe I'VE gone too far.

  23. Christine says:

    This is a fantastic article! Everyone should be reading this, wow… I forwarded this to women and guys pestering me. Thanks for helping me articulate myself.

  24. Jenna B. Wiser says:

    I just re-read this article and want to say how it hit home to me this time. Wow. It’s all about finding the right partner and not settling in wrong relationships. Finding a soulmate and only sharing your naked body with someone in love with your naked soul is the only answer. Should be mind blowing then. If you ever do find it, please write an article on how it was the best you ever had. You know what they say “Saved the best for last .”

  25. von-pipitsa says:

    I have been married twice and I have ended 2 longterm relationships because of exactly what you are describing in your article. I am single again and I really wonder: is this my life? Is this what I was born to do? My choices eliminated motherhood and I have reached the age of 50. To be able to survive I need a vivid sexuality, I need to feel connected and accepted like I need oxygen, water and food, all natural aspects of life and existence. Following various healing processes in many directions, as doing right now, helped me a lot but this sense of pattern terrifies me. Ok, everything happens for a reason, everything comes to an end. Maybe it is an issue of modern west civilization, but how many times does a woman need to expose herself and her sexuality in order to live a happy and fulfilled life with a man? I am sure most of you might think like a therapist. Same attracts same, the law of the universe, psycho-philosophical-cultural-spiritual-family-bla-bla-bla reasons are keeping us all apart from our deepest connection to love, making love and enjoying life to the fullest. Thank you for your article. We are connected..what a relief..

  26. Carly says:

    You put down in words how I feel! Thank you for reminding me I am not alone.

  27. Laura says:

    I can relate so much just to the beginning of this article that it hurts too much to even read the rest.

  28. Gorrión says:

    As a man fitting the exact opposite of the profile of the man you describe to be in a relationship with (who'd rather scratch his balls than worship you), I must say that I feel that most women now-a-days "leave behind" the men that worship them. That is a question you might ponder. Why? There are DEFINITELY/partners like the one you dream of, but we're not appreciated and we're going extinct…it's simple evolution. The women who "fear" us won't reproduce with us, hence, we're endangered. The qualities that characterize us, I think, conflict with subconscious beliefs most women have about the ideal man. Food for thought.

  29. Resonate completely. Thank you for sharing the words of experience which have been for this long term Single and highly sexual being for my entire Life. Ready to Create differently. Namaste.

  30. Jacque says:

    As a woman who is shy, but hiding it by being extravert, I find it difficult to be open and vulnerable and have been single for 6 years, after a 4 year famine relationship. In response to my total heart and loyalty, I was left with nothing. No nurturing, no reciprocation and no connection. Now, I crave touch and intimacy, but I find it hard to put myself 'out there' into the 'market' again. I'm not afraid to ask for what I want (did that in the relationship and was rebuffed many times) and I will pleasure myself (and read lots of good books), but it is like eating sugar when you are starving. It's a bit ok for a little while, but I'm still starving to death. I had learned to hide who I really was because it scared people away. I'm learning now to be me again (only took 40 odd years!!) and if he comes along, great, but I can't go looking for him yet. That still scares me!

  31. neerja says:

    I feel the same way but haven’t been able to articulate it. Thanks! Love this.

  32. Ashley says:

    I cannot believe how much this resonates with me. Thank you for sharing. It is incredibly helpful to hear that I am not alone.

  33. Ashley says:

    I am sure that this comment will not go over well but, I think why the author, and so many women in this thread are so dissatisfied sexually is because they are not treating sex as it was intended. Sex is a beautiful thing but, it's meant to be shared between one man and one women in the safety and the comfort of marriage. Every time you sleep with someone, you give a piece of yourself to them. It's a natural desire to want something in return. But when there isn't that commitment of marriage, there often is that connection as God intended. Treat sex as it was designed ladies and I can guarantee it gets so much better.

  34. ACosmos says:

    Thanks for writing. I certainly related and am happy to hear I'm not alone! I dated a woman a couple years ago who I connected with on every level. We were very close but she had her stuff, and being the young and selfish fool I am, I handled our connection poorly. I have grown a good deal from that and subsequent experience but have found dating difficult. As you suggest in your article, I know myself fairly well and getting someone else off is enjoyable in its' own right, but I've had a taste of caring and understanding deeply for the person getting off with you and I don't want anything less! But you're right also, I'm starving and the next time a pretty gal hands me a loaf of bread, I should eat! Thanks again for the article, honest growth is precious.

  35. Jennifer says:

    GREAT read. I’m actually dealing with the same feelings right now. This helps to know I am not alone. Thank you for sharing!! One love

  36. Barry says:

    It's a long story and even though unique and heartbreaking for many reasons, skipping to the present makes the most sense. The woman sitting next to me is the love of my life, my partner in every sense except sexually. Over the years spirit has brought me numerous relationships which were sparked and over time lost focus, passion and finally intimacy. Now we have intimacy, everything wonderful. We touch, massage and even do healings on each other. For about a year we played at sharing traditional sex, but for various reasons I have known before, it did not work out. I don't think it matters much what the reasons are for the physical, as the spiritual ties between us are profound. I find that gradually I am letting it go, sex. I do not climb rock faces anymore either. But my soul is soaring and I know a joy that waiting a lifetime to find is nothing.

  37. Freya Watson says:

    Hi Matthew, this reply is probably well out of date for where you are now in your life, but I'm only now noticing that comments were left well after the piece was published. What can you do to give back? Honestly, I would say look to your own deepest needs first – to what you need and want in your life. If she's not in a position to be emotionally available for you, then perhaps its not really the relationship you're hoping for. But if she is, then communicate – verbally and with touch. Talk about your deepest needs, talk about those vulnerable, soft places in the heart that we usually keep guarded. Allow her space and opportunity to do the same. It's not always a comfortable conversation topic for everyone. And keep faith – everyone needs space as well as closeness.

  38. Freya Watson says:

    It can be so much lonelier being in a relationship that's unhappy than being alone. I hope life has moved on for you since, in a happier direction. It can be difficult to know how long to keep a flame alive in a situation like that and when to move on. We each have to make our own choices. x

  39. Freya Watson says:

    A belated reply, Brad, but your comment was interesting and I've only just read it. I think what you talk about is what a lot of spiritually awakened people long for. My own experience is that we can meet such a partner but the challenges come when we try to ground the relationship into the normality of life in this dimension. As long as we can remain unencumbered with material responsibilities (if that's the correct term), we can work our way through some of the issues such as insecurity that can come with the freedom we want. But when you introduce children into the mix, it changes the dynamics of the relationship and brings in a whole heap of other practical issues such as living arrangements, how to co-parent, etc.

  40. Freya Watson says:

    One of the quirky things about writing is that it is only one angle and yet it remains static in 'print' long after the situation that prompted it has gone. In my books and other blogs here, I talk about the ecstatic experience of 'higher' sex. But, like all things, no matter how incredible the relationship, it can have its ups and downs, and the most amazing and loving partner can become the most aloof and cold partner when s/he is going through their own stuff. Try this as a balance to the perspective above : http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/07/having-sex

  41. Freya Watson says:

    Interesting comment, and I'd love to hear more. Would you consider writing a longer piece and submitting it? Yes, I know there are good men – plenty of them. And my partner in this article is one of them, only going through a tough time which left him unable to deal with anything outside of himself. The prompting to write the article came from a sense that many women feel it's not okay to say they need sex.

  42. Freya Watson says:

    Hi Ashley, I've been both married and not married but in a long term relationship. My personal experience is that the married sex wasn't particularly deep but the unmarried sex was – it had more to do with the depth of soul connection than the marital situation. At a deeper level, though, I do agree that when two people have a commitment to a higher force – whether they call that love, God, Source, or another meaningful term – then the energy does shift between them. It doesn't necessarily guarantee satisfactory sex, though.

  43. Freya Watson says:

    I love that line 'I handled our connection poorly'. How many of us can look back on relationships and say something similar! Yes, honest growth is precious. Thank you.

  44. Freya Watson says:

    Isn't that what we're after through sex anyway? It sounds like you've reached the goal and parked the vehicle for the moment (or possible forever) 🙂

  45. Amy E says:

    Unrequited sex. Perfect term. It's a constant ache and a burning in my soul. Want my partner.