April 3, 2013

Why Are We So Obsessed With Playboy Flow? {I Wish This Was An April Fool’s Edition}.


Is it a word? It rhymes with horny; it also rhymes with corny.

Am I the only one who believes Elephant is shamelessly incorporating T and A to score viewers and drive up searches?

As an intellectual community of socially conscious, activist, forward thinking adults, we can and should cover sex, gender relations and, ahem, fine yoga bodies doing their thing, in a way that is more subversive, intellectual and groundbreaking.

As a supposedly ‘enlightened’ website, we’re taking the easy way out.

Playboy yoga demonstrations clocking in at number one for the rest of the foreseeable future?

Reassurances to women that our “ugly” vaginas are normal and gorgeous? (Thanks, by the way! I will sleep better at night. I’ll cross reconstructive surgery off my list and ponder all the other ways I, as a woman, am led to believe I am physically imperfect by retailers who seek to profit from me.)

The wailing and gnashing of teeth that accompanied the sheer Lululemon pant scandal?

Sheesh. I would like to think we’ve evolved beyond a bunch of junior high schoolers spying in the locker room.

Steubenville got me thinking about hypocrisy. Our culture objectifies women (and, to a lesser extent, men) from a very early age. We are valued for how we look and what we represent rather than who we are. This is old news. There are important articles—fascinating articles—about women’s empowerment and sexual assault—on here.

While these articles receive attention, I’m sad to say, they do not linger on the ratings board for too long.

Sara Underwood’s nude Playboy video is the undisputed leader in page views and will be for the rest of eternity. (At least until somebody develops cute kitten yoga.)

The general thrust of the positive comments:

‘What a hawwwttt young woman!’

‘You can see the asana so much more clearly without clothing!’

All negative comments, distilled to the purest essence:

“WTF is this doing on here?”

I side with the ‘WTFers’ (as you may wager from the title of this post.) At the very least, can elephant become an equal-opportunity objectifier?

Apart from a PG-13 pic of Adam Levine, the male eye candy is woefully inadequate; there are no lengthy videos of buff men au naturale. Also, how about an article entitled “Your Ugly Penis is Normal and Gorgeous”?

Ha. I’m joking here; that would be pornographic.

We live in a free country with free speech (and hallelujah for that.) With great freedom comes great responsibility, said every superhero ever, and every legitimate yoga guru, too, and probably your mother and your first grade teacher.

From a conscious community standpoint, there is a dark side to being in cahoots with Hugh Hefner; its like eating Fruit Loops for every meal and expecting to practice yoga like the eponymous Sara Underwood.

Ain’t gonna happen.

Elephant has many talented writers whose quality contributions (in areas like wellness, love, green, conscious consumerism and family and education) do not receive the nearly the interest or recognition they deserve on the popularity leader board.

The Svengali-like allure of boobs and butts leaves the other stuff in the dirt.

Let’s have a Conscious Consumers Manifesto!

Got a few minutes to linger in front of the computer? Give the nude flow a break! Give some other worthy soul a chance!

Let loose the anchor; venture into uncharted waters!

Perhaps some light reading on spirituality or adventure may be just what you’re looking for.

You may learn something that will change your life.



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Ed: Bryonie Wise




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