June 6, 2013

10 Things to Give Up in Exchange for Happiness.


Via Daily Transformations

I’m told happiness is a choice.

Unfortunately we complicate our lives to the point of being unable to recognize happiness when it appears before our eyes.

So how to clear the slate? Here are 10 things you’ll need to give up in exchange for your happiness.

1.  Give up caring what other people think of you. I know it seems counter intuitive as we humans are primal pack animals that don’t want to be cast from the village, but spending time worrying what others think, is a waste of energy. You’ll never please everyone and it’s none of your business what others think of you.

2. Give up trying to please everyone.  Unless you’re living life to the beat of your own drum, your tribe won’t be able to find you. Be the best version of you you can be, and you’ll naturally attract in the people that are supposed to surround you.

3. Give up participating in gossip. 100 percent of the time, those sharing gossip with you will gossip about you. Believing gossip is like gambling everything on a horse sight unseen. It’s naive.

4. Quit worrying. Where thoughts go, energy flows. Worry is investing time and energy in something you don’t want to have happen. Learn to let go and trust.

5. Let go of insecurity. When we take ourselves too seriously, we think everyone else does too. There is one version of you on the planet. Be it, own it and quit worrying about it. No one really cares or watches you that closely.

6. Stop taking everything personally. Truth is, most people are too consumed with their own life to really consider what you’re doing. As my first boss said so well: “The world doesn’t revolve around you. Most people’s reactions have nothing to do with you, so let it go.”

7. Give up the past. We’ve all been hurt, we all had parents that made mistakes and we’ve all been through hell. You didn’t listen to your parents when you were younger, so why are you still listening to their voices in your head now? Every experience in life has taught you something or made you stronger.

8. Give up spending money on what you don’t need in effort to buy happiness. Living simply allows the space for life to flow. We complicate our lives by spending too much money and filling our home with “things.” Less is truly more.

9. Give up anger. Anger burns a hole in the hand of the person still holding on to it. Move it out once and for all.

10. Give up control. Control is an illusion.  We live in an out of control world.  Learn to embrace the new and welcome change; otherwise you’ll grow old through your own rigidity. Learn to let go.


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Ed: Kate Bartolotta

Image: Brooke Cagle/Unsplash



Chasing Happiness will Make us Miserable.

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kathleenseide Mar 8, 2014 7:51am

Nice article, but your basic assumption is a little off base. Happiness isn't something we must latch onto "when it appears before our eyes".
Choosing to be happy is something you do inside, in every situation you face in life. If you wait for happy situations to come around you won't be happy, even when you manage to grab one you'll be afraid of losing it.
For example, if you get cut off in traffic you can stay in your happy place or you can jump toward road rage. It's not something that happens to you, it's always a choice you make.

Marime Mañana Jan 17, 2014 3:16am

Wonderful article!!! Such great points on how we all should be reminded to live our lives. Thank for for sharing your wisdom with us to help us improve!! Elephant Journal rocks!!!

John Broussard Dec 29, 2013 5:09pm

I am taking #5 to heart and doing something I don't normally do….. Posting a comment. Actually I'm working on all 10 you mention. I love the words " in exchange for happiness." When you put it like that the work becomes easy. Great read Tamara. Thanks.

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Tamara Star believes happiness is not an end destination, but instead the ability to see the ordinary through eyes of wonder.

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