May 15, 2014

9 Realizations I’ve had about Relationships. ~ Sherina Mayani

Mirror Balls

Taking care of our relationships can be quite draining.

Which is why I’d like to share these nine realizations about relationships that have helped me find peace with everyone, including myself:

1. Realize that we have attracted everyone in our lives.

Everyone in our life is our creation. Our vibration brought them in. This is true for everyone, including our family, friends, acquaintances and co-workers.

2. Realize that we can learn from everyone.

It can be from the cashier at the supermarket or a person who chats with us while waiting in line at Starbucks. With this realization, we will always be looking for people to learn and grow from.

3. Realize that we have control over our emotions and feelings.

Many times we can be stuck and codependent on other peoples’ feelings. I remember when my emotions would mirror a friend or family member’s emotion. After a while, I realized that I have control over my feelings, and I did not have to take upon the feelings of other people. I can assist, support, inspire and motivate people, but I don’t have to take over their feelings.

4. Realize that we cannot keep everyone happy.

This realization is the most powerful one of all. If we were trying to make everyone around us happy, we would spend more than a lifetime doing so. Trying to do this can be extremely draining. The most interesting part of this is that we really have no control over other peoples’ happiness. Maybe we can influence them, but it is up to them to choose happiness. I have learned that the best thing we can do is to keep the most important person happy—ourselves.

5. Realize that we can love and forgive people from a distance.

We do not have to be with people that are not supporting us. We can love people from a distance. Sometimes, in certain relationships, distance can be a very healthy key for success.

6. Realize that relationships are mirrors—they reflect important things about us.

If we want to grow and mature faster, my advice is to see relationships as mirrors and grow from there.

7. Realize that what we admire and love in other people exists in us.

I know all of us have a certain role model or a person we really admire. When we think about the qualities of this person, we admire them because these qualities are in us as well. They might not be developed, but they are inside of us.

8. Realize what upsets us about other people exists in us as well.

If we get upset with someone’s characteristic, it is usually a characteristic that we also possess. Next time we feel annoyed by someone, we should pause, breathe, relax and think about how this trait exists within ourselves. Once we understand this concept, those annoyances will disappear. Eventually, acknowledging the annoying habits will change our feelings and we will be able to change our behavior for the better.

9. Realize that we have the power to choose the relationships in our life.

We choose whom to talk to, spend time with, play with, work with and even marry. Our relationships will benefit If we practice being conscious of our choices.


Remember that we are here for a reason and so are the people in our lives. When we become aware of this and acknowledge this, we grow. When we live in gratitude, everything is for our benefit.

When we switch to this mindset, our whole world changes.

We won’t let people bring us down. Rather, we will be grateful for our relationships, because we know they are just blessings and opportunities for growth.


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Apprentice Editor: Marcee Murray King / Editor: Rachel Nussbaum

Photo: AmberNectar13/Flickr

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Sherina Mayani