There are far too many of us that are insecure and uncomfortable in our own skin.
We feel like a stranger living in this shell that we are not cohesively in tune with. Our minds have found this alien body to hop into and wreak havoc on our body image. We are unhappy in this vessel that moves us throughout this life.
We keep thinking that if our body changed, we’d achieve more happiness, more love, more adornment from our partners—from the world.
We want to shed that muffin top. Work those biceps. Get a breast augmentation—all in hopes that society will smile its perfectly whitened, straight and wicked grin upon us and bless our rock hard body. However, an endless amount of plastic surgery and exercise still cannot mend our unscrupulous body image.
Our view of ourselves is within, within the labyrinth of our own ideas, our own mind, and society’s requisites.
Our mind is holding the key to that happiness, love, and adornment that we are searching for. We must find it within selves to be accepting of all that we are.
Often body image issues are considered to be only that of women, more so adolescent women. But this insulting behavior from our mind is not only for the feminine species—men are also plagued by these insecurities as well. There are no age nor gender stipulations—it can have a hold of all of us, if we let it. But instead, we should cognitively take the steps below to learn to love our flaws.
Our flaws make us who we are.
We must take time to explore our bodies. Look in front of a mirror and get familiar with who you are. The areas that you detest, spend extra time on them. Let your eyes get familiar with how you look. All in hopes that your perception will change.
Trace the maps of your body.Take a journey through your rocky spine, your valleys, your hills. Get to know how you feel. Where you are soft, where you are calloused, where it tickles…
Watch yourself breathe. You will find such astonishment and respect for all that your body does every day to be alive, just for you! Watch the fall of your lungs and chest rise up and down. The way your diaphragm can push your belly in and out—nurturing with the pure essence of being.
Find comfort in being nude. It’s liberating and complete freedom. You can see all that your body does hidden behind the constraints of clothes. The muscles that are used to walk. The way your back curves at the slightest angle when you stand up. Reverence for the glorious god or goddess that you are, will develop.
Finding a partner that worships your body and soul can show you an endless amount of courage to fall in love with yourself and worship your body and soul as well. Your partner loves your body—so why don’t you? They embrace all that embodies who we are. They love our body for all that it is. The flaws that we see—they have yet to find them. The cellulite on our butt, the way our thighs touch, a few extra pounds—all of these things our partner only sees a gorgeous ass, delectable thighs, and a curvy body that is soft and requesting their touch.
I am living testament of body dysmorphia.
I spent my middle school and high school years being overly consumed on how I looked and how the world perceived me. I ate very little and I worked out everyday to burn all of the calories I consumed. I was never happy with my body—even at 95 pounds I thought I was fat, ugly, and that no one would ever love me.
I found that when I was very uncomfortable with my body, there was something I could learn from it. And this was the process of me learning to love my flaws. What made me uncomfortable, someone else loved. Why was I being so silly?!
Over the years, I have explored myself.
I found that I love food, so why torture myself. I love working out too, but refuse to kill myself just so I can eat that pizza—I’ll just eat the pizza. I’m curvy. I was made this way, so I embrace it. I don’t beat myself up for not fitting in a size zero anymore. I’m actually more comfortable being naked, in my own skin, my own glory!
We are all human. It’s okay to have insecurities, we all do. But do not let them consume you and take away from the shining light that you are.
Love elephant and want to go steady?
Editor: Catherine Monkman