You Don’t Need A Man, You Need a Goddamn Warrior.

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Warning: naughty language ahead!

To my sweet wild woman, I know why it hasn’t worked out with anyone else—you don’t need a man, but a goddamn warrior.

You are the strength of Turkish coffee at sunrise darlin’ and don’t try to pretend that you’re not.

You are one of the wild ones, and no matter how you tried to hide that fact, you can’t be anything other than what you are—and that’s okay. You are just as you are supposed to be, magnificently wild in all of your chaotic beauty.

I know you’ve had your heart broken and I know that you don’t understand why it always seems to never work out, but I’ve finally figured it out:

You don’t need a man, you need a goddamn warrior.

It doesn’t matter if this warrior drives a Jeep or a shiny sports car, and it won’t matter if he wears silk or cotton—it will not even matter if he works in a high-rise, or on the night shift.

What is going to matter is that when it comes to taking bets on your heart, he is going to be high stakes—all the way.

This warrior of yours will crave your strength, and your intensity. He’s going to look at you and not see something to tame, but something to just fuckin’ admire. This warrior of yours won’t be someone that you can manipulate or play with as you have in the past, so honey, don’t even try—and trust me, you’re going to love him even more because of it.

Because you aren’t just a woman, you’re a goddamn goddess.

Your fierceness is going to bring him to his knees every single time he looks into your gorgeous eyes, but the difference is, unlike the others, he isn’t going to be scared off. No, this time, you will have finally met your match—because a simple man for you just won’t do.

You need someone to match the fire in your eyes with his own. Not only that, my little wild thing, but this warrior of yours is going to want to encourage the flames instead of trying to douse them with his own insecurities.

Because for you, a warrior is the only man who will ever live in the wild with you.

He may not have to slay any dragons to earn your love, but he would still walk through fire if it meant seeing that amazing smile that you hold in reserve for only him.

This is the thing, free spirit, this warrior you seek….he’s seeking you too.

For he’s had failed relationships that have left him wondering if maybe he was meant to be alone for the rest of his journey—and you’re going to change all of that for him. You both have been travelling along on your separate journeys and have been doing an okay job at it, but that about to change too.

Because baby, when you and this warrior of yours meet and collide—it’s going to be a love set on fire.

Don’t try to run this time—I know your heart has been broken before, and that you’re not used to things working out, but this time it’s different. Give yourself time to see that.

This warrior of yours needs to see that it’s possible for someone to see all of his wild, and still be there when he craves his freedom and ventures off into this world for a bit. You won’t always need to follow him, just as he won’t always follow you. Let yourself stay wild, even when all you want to do is curl up in that spot along his side and forget the rest of the world exists.

Let yourself still wander naked under the full moon, and drink moonshine with the stars. Let yourself feel the pull of the wind on your heart, and the sun toward a new journey. Because this warrior is going to love you because of your wild—and he’ll want you to keep it.

You’ll be in this together now, this amazing, crazy, chaotic, wonderfully heartbreaking life—because it takes a warrior to love a goddess. And it takes a goddess to show a warrior what real love is.

So pack up your insecurities and your ideas about picket fences, because that was never you anyway. You were born knowing that you were destined for more, and now is the time for you to see what all those dreams look like.

There is no stopping a love like this, so promise me you’ll hold out just a little bit longer.

Have a little bit of hope, and always give love just one more try, because I promise you my sweet wild woman—the love that you seek is seeking you as well.




The Important Connection Between Diet & Mental Health.

Bonus! Don’t settle for just any kind of love: 


Author: Kate Rose

Editor: Catherine Monkman

Photo: Mr. Seb/Flickr

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jonestim74 Mar 16, 2019 4:41am

If you haven’t found him yet, he’s still out there looking, trust me I know. You are very hard to find but I’ll figure it out, always do!

mitch.kelly Mar 3, 2019 3:04pm

I can smell something. I think I know what it is. It’s bullshit.

Michelle Linquist Feb 14, 2019 12:23am

I saved this a while back and have just read it at a time that Univerally is much more appropriate (dont you love how that works).. your words of complete awesomeness.. boo ya to ‘Goddam Goddess’.. thank you much for such a great piece, and for reminding me to look for the Warrior not the minion..ha translated by me… find a good man who has your back and wants to put his hat in the ring..who indeed gets your ‘fire’.. indeed well and truly what I needed to read today. Love n Light. Valentines Day 14/2/19 ❤️

Blowingfeather Feb 10, 2019 10:36am

Why does the article have to describe women at “little” or “baby?”

rgordon3001 Feb 8, 2019 6:17am

“Because you aren’t just a woman, you’re a goddamn goddess.”
Just one more example of the magical and narcissistic thinking that dooms relationships between two normal, flawed individuals.

brenda galinski Jan 17, 2019 4:44am

I loved this article! I thought I had mine this time, except he turned out to be clingy and selfish and insecure.. I will always love him for the lessons I learned.. That I need someone to lean on as well, just not be the post all the time..

dylansflower Jan 17, 2019 1:38am

Katie, I feel that you put into words; exactly what my spirit whispers to me daily! I know my warrior is out there.. I look forward to meeting him at the crossroad! I shared this because I know many Goddesses that will appreciate your words, as much as I do!’

Li La Dec 12, 2018 2:52am

I love this text sooo much, thank you 🙂 greetings from austria

Robin Brennan Dec 5, 2018 9:00am

Unbelievably beautiful.

Katrina.Phillips2010 Dec 3, 2018 8:24pm

Bravooo Kate! Beautifully written and makes perfectly good sense! I needed to hear that being in my skin was the right place to be…just as me!

Hannah Horkan Dec 3, 2018 7:50pm

Needed this, thank you for sharing. A goddamn Goddess is right, and I’ll never settle for anything less than a warrior.

Thank you again <3

kimberlyzdream Dec 3, 2018 4:44pm

Thank You for this Beautiful piece ❤️ It truly gives me a renewed hope and reminds me of how much I love who I am ❤️

emarie422 Nov 28, 2018 8:55am

I didn’t think my Warrior existed but he came into my life many years ago, lifted me up and now I can breathe again.

Justine Dolling Nov 27, 2018 4:33pm

Just awesome! Written beautifully and touched my soul x

anonymous Apr 12, 2016 6:20am

Awesomeness! This made me smile a great big smile. Thanks, fellow goddess

anonymous Apr 8, 2016 12:54pm

I have just let go of a wild women. Sometmes the dynamics don't always flow favourably. I feel sad because I tried so hard to love these qualities and yet her dominance took everything I had. The masculine must remain rooted in his strength but know when he is not serving himself or it may result in pre longed pain for both parties. My final strong hold was to let this wild woman go to someone who can better serve her.

anonymous Mar 21, 2016 8:10pm

Exactly what I needed.
Thank you.

anonymous Mar 17, 2016 5:44pm

Kate, this is amazing. Thank you for how you speak to my heart. Thank your for your hard work that touches us all so deeply. ❤

anonymous Mar 8, 2016 10:07am

A warrior too long without a goddess goes rogue.

anonymous Mar 1, 2016 11:49am

I am loving your words, inspiration and hope. You mirror my thoughts, my heart. Thank you

anonymous Feb 28, 2016 6:45pm

I just adored this and fell into my news feed as I am splitting with my third husband who I adore but differences are just too much for him. I have tried so hard but he has changed and admits he doesn’t know how to be the person he once was and that I deserve better. i look forward to finally meeting my warrior one day because so much of this rang true. x

anonymous Feb 23, 2016 4:00pm

This is really beautiful. Thank you !

anonymous Feb 23, 2016 3:06am

Brilliant….thank you

anonymous Feb 6, 2016 4:06am

Irony personified

You and me

for the very attributes I love

Are the very reason we can’t be

anonymous Feb 6, 2016 3:41am

ok, I'm not giving up- maybe there is hope:-) Thank You for your encouraging words!

anonymous Feb 5, 2016 3:49pm

This could have been written by a female version of me! Where IS this woman? I'm not sure women like this exist; I've searched my whole life. I checked out Kate Rose's webpage and it is amazingly similar to my blog in layout, bravado and pursuit of passion. I'm seeking permission to use this article, giving credit of course, on my blog: Can anyone moderating these comments pass this query along to Ms. Rose?

Thx! Heroes 'N Pirates

anonymous Feb 5, 2016 3:22pm

When I started reading this, I smiled first, then I laughed, and later I realized that I really need someone like this. Sometimes we forget the beauty of finding our half, and actually we can be convinced we’ll run alone along our lives. Now I wonder if there would be someone like him in my life. Thanks for give us hope. God bless you.

anonymous Feb 5, 2016 8:07am

I really needed to hear this. One thing that gives me hope is that the one I seek is seeking me too. Thank you for this reminder. 🙂

anonymous Feb 5, 2016 6:44am

Just remember that a warrior has strength, audacity and weapons. Warriors are scary. You aren’t always going to be able to control them.

anonymous Feb 4, 2016 11:32am

WOW! Amazing! This is exactly what I needed to read and I’m going to take it into my life now. Thank you.

anonymous Jan 15, 2016 9:44am

You could’ve just wrote Boy/Man and Girl/Woman instead of Woman/Goddess and Man /Warrior.

anonymous Jan 14, 2016 8:50am

Love love love this… It is now my mantra!!!!

anonymous Jan 14, 2016 6:17am

Love you, Kate ! A big hug for this article ! Thank you ! <3

anonymous Jan 7, 2016 4:45pm

Nice article less the "goddamn" adjectives.

    anonymous Mar 8, 2016 8:52pm

    Agreed. No need to disrespect other's religions to make a point.

anonymous Jan 7, 2016 1:27am

“trying to douse (the flames) with his own insecurities” sure have experienced that in the past!! But was too young to understand.
Beautifully described above, wish i’d been able to understand this years ago. Obviously some people won’t ‘get’ it.

anonymous Jan 4, 2016 4:01am

A big THANK YOU for your wonderful words! Awesome!!!

anonymous Dec 22, 2015 5:02am

Please understand that the wild woman is just one of many female archetypes that every woman has inside of her. As is the case with the ‘goddamn’ warrior archetype for men. There are also the “king”, “magician” and lover for example. Explore and cultivate every side of yourself and of your partner.

anonymous Dec 14, 2015 1:26pm

Reading this brought such a big smile on my face, that I read it again. And again. I think I’m just gonna print this out and read this whenever I need it. Thank you, sweet wild woman!

anonymous Nov 29, 2015 1:16am

“Not only that, my little wild thing, but this warrior of yours is going to want to encourage the flames instead of trying to douse them with his own insecurities.” This resonates so much. I needed this article sooo much. Thank you. 🙂

anonymous Nov 28, 2015 10:00am

Exactly what I needed to understand right now. Thank you thank you

anonymous Nov 9, 2015 2:09pm

LOVED this article thank you!!

anonymous Nov 9, 2015 2:03pm

Thank you! Talk about devine timing. This is exactly everything i needed to hear! Sometimes we forget that if we wait a little longer our time will come. Don’t settle. My warrior is out there! So thanks for the reminder! I loved and needed this!

anonymous Oct 26, 2015 2:05am

"You are the strength of Turkish coffee at sunrise darlin’ and don’t try to pretend that you’re not."

I really needed to hear this today. Thank you.

anonymous Oct 18, 2015 4:08pm

I totally needed to read this!! It is me to a tee! I am a free spirit, wild Goddess and I need a Warrior. I could never put into words until after reading this and it makes perfect sense.

    anonymous Feb 5, 2016 3:08pm

    I have no words I adopt yours

anonymous Oct 18, 2015 4:06pm

This is a profound article. When I read it it felt as though I was saying it to my wild goddess, but it was actually one goddess to another. Exquisite writing and perspective.

– (One Typo: “but that about to change too.” should be, “but that’s about to change too.”)

Blessings to you.

anonymous Oct 18, 2015 12:16pm

Wow, this totally describes my relationship with my husband, I am a Goddess and he is my Warrior, and we waited such a long time to find each other, thank you Kate, for this wonderful article.

anonymous Sep 20, 2015 4:38am

Well this was an incredibly stupid and poorly written article.

anonymous Sep 9, 2015 9:54pm

This is so beautiful. Thank you for the ability to express what I want to say !

anonymous Sep 5, 2015 10:06pm

Oh My God, YES!!! Thank you for this! The Celtic goddess in me is singing with this post validating me. I have learned many times that reducing myself to be less for a man, just doesn’t work! You rock!

anonymous Sep 5, 2015 2:21pm

Amazing! thanks! great article! Finnally how i feel put into words!

anonymous Sep 5, 2015 12:51pm

Effing beautiful. Left me with a tear in my eye and an "oh yes….hell yes".

anonymous Sep 5, 2015 12:41pm

Love this! I totally relate, it sounds as if it speaks of my personality. So i have always been told. My mom always said it take a special man for me. Now i understand what she has been saying.

anonymous Aug 27, 2015 2:55pm

Dear Heart: I read this with tears running down my face because I am finally letting my strength emerge…keeping myself open and strong to receive…

All Love,

Padme A’Tea

anonymous Aug 23, 2015 6:45pm

I love this article! I've re-read it several times. It truly reflects how I feel and what I want from my warrior. I will hold out a lil longer. 🙂

anonymous Aug 23, 2015 1:31am

I have been re-reading this article many times. It is beautifully written and concerns men as much as women. I have found my warrior. Thanks for this beautiful piece of work

anonymous Aug 21, 2015 5:10pm

This reads like an excerpt from a new age Harlequin Romance paperback. I’ve experienced the “World of the Warrior” during my years as an Army Ranger. What kind of “warrior” is the author alluding to? Probably an urban “bad boy” who plays a musical instrument, writes poetry, sports a ridiculous hipster beard with sidewalls hair style, plays ultimate frisbee and has a good job who will support her and children than a man who comes home at the end of a long moonless night from the back of beyond with dried human blood and brains splattered on his battle uniform. This article should have been submitted to the Onion as new age satire.

anonymous Aug 21, 2015 3:58pm

Adam Goldberg is the ‘goddamn warrior’?

anonymous Aug 20, 2015 4:57pm

I can say, those warriors are in our world. They are real men and they can stand with the wild, loving it. They know that the values in her emotions add to the single-minded purpose he sometimes holds and he will stand by his own beliefs of truth, and right and wrong.

Yes, these are real men, and as real men, they will sometimes fall, sometimes fail, sometimes fail to see and sometimes let you down, but when they do, they will own their own limits as powerfully as they own their own power. They will pick themselves up, make amends as best they can and move on with their lives.

And you have crossed his path before in your life, maybe without even knowing. He is the one that did not flinch when you acted weird. He is the one that you saw do the right thing, even when it didn't seem on the surface to be in his personal best interest. He is the one that somehow saw when someone needed his help and he just showed up, not to count what favor was now owed him, but just because it is his nature to help.

anonymous Aug 20, 2015 2:43pm

Wouldn’t this be considered…unrealistic standards for a man? If we have to be warriors, you have to not be fat. Sounds fair and equal to me.

anonymous Aug 20, 2015 7:07am

I hope this is a joke. Terrible. Nothing in here is discussing equality, humbleness, the capability to make the decision to love and the commitment to the relationship. I am no goddess. I dont need to be. As an imperfect human being and a woman, I am ENOUGH. Any man who choices to be, can develop the capability to Be ENOUGH as well.

Let me add that article is disgusting in its tone of voice.. sure its not condescending in the direct fashion of the 50's or even the current 'good ol boy network' that saturates upper management – yet its placating and oozing another form of sexism catering to my sex as the superior . Gag me. I dont want to be a mans superior(well maybe his boss in an career environment) I want an equal, no catering to my princess-hood or my 'lost lil girl' or any other bs. needed. Simply Be. Its enough.

anonymous Aug 19, 2015 2:09pm

Warriors asses the chaos around them and subjects it to his will – making it his own. Wild women who want warriors, prepare to be tamed.

anonymous Aug 19, 2015 5:30am

Such beautiful true words. Thank you xx

anonymous Aug 18, 2015 11:51pm

I LOVE how this resonates with women here and seems liberating because I do some of this stuff myself (don’t try to water down flames, etc) although that particular word “warrior” is no friend of mine- not just the ones who make that their profession. Those types of men who I have to apologize for every day, while women look past me. Perhaps I’m a warrior of good or whatever but even that reminds me of “onward Christian soldiers..” That’s too gross to me, so what am I missing? :/

    anonymous Aug 19, 2015 6:56pm

    Spoken Like a true Beta. Bert – go find your Ernie.

anonymous Aug 18, 2015 3:00pm

Nice and idealistic and all, but what happens when the mundane reality of daily existence sets in? What then? Going into the bathroom after your warrior has just dropped a nasty deuce or when you and your warrior have little mini warriors… Nice try though.

anonymous Aug 18, 2015 2:39pm

Thank you so much. I truly needed this at this moment. I was about to try to settle for less and I knew better. I asked for a sign to help me on my direction regarding love and I came upon this article. Thank you much! I am truly grateful and yes, I too will be printing this out as well.

anonymous Aug 18, 2015 10:12am

I had my warrior….my wonderful British husband…he died five years ago…now I am meant to be alone.

anonymous Aug 17, 2015 1:30pm

Thank you, for validating and eloquently voicing all the reasons why I love her.

anonymous Aug 17, 2015 9:53am

This is a beautiful piece. Thank you. I married a warrior, just as you described him here. We were blessed with a decade together, even if three and a half of those years were spent with him bedridden by three strokes. His first death anniversary was on Aug. 13—and your words have given me such great comfort at a time when picking up the pieces of a life that will never be the same again has proven to be a challenge because I am so shaken and unsure of what strength my husband saw in me.

Thank you for reminding me of my husband’s own sentiments, which he’d shared with me every day, but which were drowned out by my grieving. This is a precious, precious gift.

anonymous Aug 16, 2015 4:04pm

Fantasy driven nonsense. As if women didn’t have unrealistic expectations to begin with. :eye roll:

anonymous Aug 16, 2015 12:59pm

I had actually reached this conclusion this morning, while walking along the beach! You have managed to put it into such beautiful words… my heart was beating fast during the whole read!
Thank you so much <3

anonymous Aug 16, 2015 10:11am

It is funny how the universe brings you a message you need to hear at the right moment. Thank you for the reminder about the value we each bring and until someone is fierce enough to handle my fire I’ll continue in this journey solo. I never want to be the person someone settles for but instead the choice they make. Thank you for the words of inspiration!

anonymous Aug 16, 2015 12:06am

This is just wonderful! I want to read things by you everyday! Your writing is inspiring. Thank you for reminding us who we are, what we deserve and what we can offer!

anonymous Aug 15, 2015 3:28pm

The universe knows – I needed this!! Thank you!!

anonymous Aug 15, 2015 2:07pm

Thank you so much Kate… I love you for writing these articles. It's just what some of us need.

anonymous Aug 15, 2015 1:47pm

My goodness! It’s so perfect! Makes me cry with emotion! Thank you for this beautiful text!

anonymous Aug 15, 2015 12:41pm

Utterly perfectly worded. Thank you for being wild and for staying that way. There has been a voice in the pit of my stomach screaming, now I know what that voice has been saying.

anonymous Aug 15, 2015 5:58am

This was the most gorgeous reminder to me that even though I may crave to share my love with someone (sometimes to an unbearable extent), I must never ever ever settle for any man less than my goddam warrior. Bless you for this post, Kate! Bless you.

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 9:11pm

Meh, sounds like she wants to be fought over by, lol, alpha males. The world is pretty ruff & tumble, peace still not universally accepted, I avoid those enclaves.

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 2:53pm

so the woman gets to live in the heavens, be immortal and have unlimited celestial powers, while the man is someone who marches for months, often starving and freezing, to go die in a muddy ditch in a foreign land, alone, bleeding out from a spear wound to the stomach.

sounds like a fair, equal footing to start a relationship on

    anonymous Aug 18, 2015 5:07pm

    you're mistaking a warrior for a soldier. 🙂 There's a big difference. It's an attitude, not an occupation.

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 9:18am

Your words tear at every heart string. Thank you!

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 5:21am

Thank you! 🙂

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 5:21am

Thank you! <3

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 4:48am

So glad I found you El

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 1:17am

Love this Kate thank you! I am all about embracing my inner Aphrodite and want to embrace a man’s Adonis!

anonymous Aug 14, 2015 1:12am

I loved reading this! Because I do believe it, wholeheartedly, but I needed this reminder. Thank you with all my heart.

anonymous Aug 13, 2015 10:27pm

I FUCKING love this!!!! <3

anonymous Aug 13, 2015 9:48pm

Thank you, my dearest Kate Rose! This was exactly what I needed to hear this week… It was absolutely perfect!

anonymous Aug 13, 2015 8:35pm

THIS THIS THIS YEEEEEEEEEEES. Kate bless you for writing this. I resonate with it so so so much. It's so refreshing to see a sacred women acknowledge that there are warriors out there. I consider myself of of them. The women you describe in this…. THAT is who I am open to meeting. BIG warrior hug to you and all the sacred women out there. Peace

anonymous Aug 13, 2015 8:32pm

THIS THIS THIS YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES. I’m a dude and I adore this article. I resonate with it so so so so much. Bless you Kate for writing it. The energy jumps of the page. Sending you and all the sacred women looking for their spirit warrior a HUGE love filled hug. Peace

anonymous Aug 13, 2015 4:12pm

'My little wild thing' … this is exactly the problem. Even the strong women don't realise when they are diminishing themselves. You call a child 'my little terror, my little ragamuffin' not a grown woman that you respect and admire. A wild thing. There's nothing little or diminutive about a woman with fire.

anonymous Aug 13, 2015 10:07am

Hello! Thank you! Because of this, I had hope! This gives me hope that one day I will be loved. That one day, my warrior will come 🙂 Thank you so much!

anonymous Aug 12, 2015 10:55pm

The Elephant is truly a new age Cosmopolitan.

Mills and Boon + spirituality…


anonymous Aug 12, 2015 10:44pm

Thank you for this.

anonymous Aug 12, 2015 10:30pm

I found my warrior…..finally. And it's all of this and more. It's breathtaking.

anonymous Aug 12, 2015 7:59pm

Yes, yes, yes. And I will not settle for less.

anonymous Aug 12, 2015 5:11pm

it makes me cry literally!! thanks for sharing 🙂 you made my day

anonymous Aug 12, 2015 4:14pm

<3 Beautiful.

anonymous Aug 12, 2015 3:30pm

I will print this article and keep it near me forever. I needed this. Thank you.

P.S: This is the first comment on Elephant Journal until now.

    anonymous Aug 12, 2015 5:52pm

    Yes. Just the perfect time to remind who I am!

    anonymous Aug 29, 2015 1:13am

    This is something I will also print, and keep by my side, it lit a fire in me for years to come. WOW-


    Thank you so much xo.

    anonymous Sep 9, 2015 4:08pm

    I think most of these guys are locked-up in prison.

Vivianna Cruz Feb 25, 2017 10:47pm

why I can't give a like or a heart to this :( I am your fan dear Kate Rose <3

Sheila Young Feb 19, 2017 1:26am

Very good article

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Kate Rose

Kate Rose is an artist, free thinker, lover, writer, passionate yogi, teacher, mother, rule breaker, and rebel. She can usually be found walking barefoot in the moonlight between worlds with the dreams of stars still hanging in her hair, swaying her hips to the music of life and smelling of sweet bourbon and honeysuckle. She lives for adventure and wakes each morning with the excitement of a new day waiting to unfold at her feet. She truly believes the best is yet to come and waits, with bated breath, to see what it may hold. Follow her on TwitterFacebook or Instagram, and find more of her words on her website.