My answer six month ago, would have been this.
Six months ago, I was going through a particularly rocky transition after being forcibly removed from my apartment.
When we are feeling lost and directionless in an ocean of confusion, the important stuff stays, and everything else gradually falls away—until we reach the point of the most bearable lightness, where the important stuff is the guiding beacon lighting our way.
But this week, my perspective has shifted.
And maybe it’s because I’m looking transition in the eye (again) and I’m terrified of what the unknown of the future looks like.
I suffer from anxiety attacks and this week brought on a nasty episode a few mornings ago where I ended up motionless and directionless on my couch for hours with tears trickling down my face. Transition brings out the worst (and best) in all of us…
I read this, my rescue remedy for when I’m not feeling like I am enough. The Viktor Frankl quote struck me particularly poignantly. I have laid eyes on this blog at least ten times, but it was almost if that morning was the first time I was truly reading the quote.
“Life holds a potential meaning under any conditions, even the most miserable ones…in some ways, suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds meaning. What man needs is not the discharge of tension at any cost, but the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him.” ~ Viktor Frankl
My eyes landed on this quote and it took my breath away—it was exactly what I needed to hear at that very moment.
I posted the quote to my Facebook wall a short while later, when I was unfrozen from the paralysis of fear. It was my gentle nod of the head and a silent bow to all who get it. Those who get what it’s like to not feel like we’re enough and those who feel like they’re meant for more, but are just working through the rocky and windy hillside from point A to B. We all suffer at one time or another from not feeling like we are enough and feeling like we’re denying ourselves from living out our soul’s purpose on this planet.
I’m not saying the emptiness is easy to work with and through, but there is meaning in the voids and the misery if we just lean into the lessons of our emotions.
Author: Caitlin Oriel
Image: Prozac Nation still