June 28, 2017

If you Love Someone, Fight for Them.

Love is the only thing in the world worth fighting for.

I’m the kind of person who would do anything to be with the person I love. I’d cross oceans and move mountains just to feel my lover’s breath against my skin.

For me, there isn’t a problem that love cannot solve. There’s isn’t an ailment or a complication that love can’t heal. Life would be trivial and futile if it didn’t contain love at its core.

Sometimes, I think I’m the problem—maybe I idealize love too much and put my lover on a pedestal. And perhaps the biggest problem of all is expecting people to fight for me as much as I would fight for them. If collecting stars is what it takes to be with me, I’d expect my lover to build the tallest ladder, crack open the sky, and get those goddamn stars.

Other times, I reassure myself that my perception on love is alright. What is the value of our human experience if we don’t fight for love? Everything that we fight for in life—our job, country, or ideas—we fight for them because we love them abundantly.

So, tell me—why don’t we fight for the person we love?

Oftentimes, our love gets stuck in a verbal world, and it slowly dies there. Transforming words into actions has become a dilemma that the majority of people struggle with. However, if our love remains just words, then it wasn’t truly love in the first place. Sure, we might want the person we love, but perhaps we do not want them enough.

Because the truth is—as idealistic as it might sound—if we really want to be with someone, we’ll do anything to be with them. If we truly love them, we wouldn’t take time for granted. In fact, we should be sh*tting our pants when time passes by, and we’re not with the person we love.

Because if you truly want someone, you wouldn’t have the guts to mess with time to begin with. You wouldn’t risk losing one second with the person you love, because you know someone else might step up and fight for them instead. And what should frighten you even more is that they might grow tired of waiting for you to fight for them—and they might move on.

So, if you really love them—fight for them.

I understand that you might have internal (or external) issues that need to be resolved. You might have problems that are bigger than you and bigger than your love. We all get confused, lost, and have trouble understanding what we want at times. But only we, ourselves, can put a stop to our confusion by taking the first step. There’s absolutely nothing standing between us and the person we love, except for our overthinking and fears.

If you really love someone, make it work.

Love isn’t magic—you don’t just snap your fingers and all is solved. If you’re not fighting to make it work, or if you’re dwelling on the issues that might be a hindrance, then you might not truly want it to work. But if you really, genuinely want to be with them, then give love a chance.

Giving love a chance and failing is still better than not even trying.

So if you really love them, do anything to be with them. Don’t let fear torment you. Don’t let doubt mess with your head. While you’re weighing your options, minutes are slipping away from you. Your lover is at the opposite end of the river—don’t think too much about how to build your boat. And, if you fail at building it, throw yourself in the water and let the stream guide you to your love.

Know that the thoughts in your mind have nothing to do with love; that’s just chatter. Love is an energy that flows, and you must flow with it. If you analyze it or try to understand it, you’ll cause its annihilation.

Love isn’t meant to be understood or rationalized. Love is meant to be lived and to be fought for.

The torment of not fighting for love is much worse than the torment of not trying. If you fight for love and lose the battle, you’ll still know that at least you tried your best to win. But if you don’t go into that battle, you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering what could have been.

If you really love someone, you should be already on the phone, reaching out to them now.

 

~

Author: Elyane Youssef
Image: Flickr/Madalena Pestana

Editor: Yoli Ramazzina
Copy editor: Taia Butler
Social editor: Lieselle Davidson

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