November 4, 2017

There’s No Need to be Offended.


Why is it so threatening when a woman is happy to be alone?

Why is it so threatening when a woman opts not to have a romantic relationship in her life—for now, or forever?

Why is it so threatening when a woman knows exactly what she wants?

Why is it so threatening when she says so?

Why is it so threatening when a woman takes ownership of her life?

Why is it so threatening when a woman laughs, cries, dances, sings, speaks from the soul?

Why is it so offensive when a woman loves her body?

Why is it so offensive when a woman chooses not to have children, a husband, a “normal life”?

Why is it so offensive when a woman says no—to a date, to a drink, to a kiss?

Why is it so offensive when a woman says yes—to solitude, to lovers, to self-discovery?

Why is it so goddamn unacceptable for a woman to live her own life, by her own rules, without asking permission, without making apologies, without seeking approval?

Why is it that simply by existing we seem to threaten and offend? Is it so terrible that women are freely chasing joy in ever-increasing numbers?

Is it so unsettling that women are claiming their power?

No. The answer, of course, is no.

It is not so terrible. There is no reason to feel threatened. There is no need to be offended.

Let us rise.


Author: Toby Israel
Image: TobyIsrael/Instagram
Editor: Lieselle Davidson
Copy Editor: Sara Kärpänen

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Toby in the World Nov 17, 2017 4:46am

So glad to hear it, Brenda! Thanks for reading :D

Toby in the World Nov 17, 2017 4:45am

Hey John, thanks for your comment! I'm not sure I fully understand, but I would definitely agree that being offended and being disappointed are different reactions. All the best to you! :)

John Bradford Nov 4, 2017 9:31pm

Let's not confuse being offended with being disappointed. Of course, with disappointment, there must have been some expectation that she would align with how you think. Let's stop reflecting ourselves off of others for the sake of them agreeing with OUR concepts of living and OUR quality of life.

Tim Dibble Nov 4, 2017 6:42pm

Why, if you are a self sufficient and capable woman would it matter if anyone is offended? I always remember that opinions are like assholes-everyone has one and they all smell like shit.

Brenda Collings Nov 4, 2017 5:46pm

NO, great article, speaks to me !

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Toby Israel

Toby Israel is a vagabond and storyteller with a metaphorical closet full of hats. She currently works as a creative facilitator, editor, and writer, and as Chief Storyteller at NuMundo. She is also a full-time lover of movement, food, and words. For the moment, she lives in Costa Rica. (She came for a master’s degree in Media, Peace, and Conflict Studies from the UN-mandated University for Peace—and stayed for the papaya, sunshine, and conscious community.) Share her journey on her website, and on FacebookInstagram and Twitter!