3.6

Creating Space for Yourself in 2019. Inviting in Acceptance and Forgiveness.

End of year feels

If you´re feeling like 98% of the population you probably feel tired, drained, over saturated, groggy, cloudy, demotivated, confused, anxious or even quite sad.

How is it that a time of Joy can bring about so many less favorable emotions and feelings?!

It has its ways. The point is, it is what it is, and this is the way you´re feeling.

 

So what are you going to do about it?

Acknowledge and accept what you’re feeling. Clear some space among all the stuff that may have risen just beneath the surface. There may be some issues connected to your past, your childhood and/or your family, there may be some relationship uncertainties, disappointments or tiffs floating in the air, you may even simply feel some disconnect from yourself due to the lack of routine that some of us so unknowingly appreciate.

Take a few moments either verbally, mentally or in your journal to just jot down all this STUFF you have stirred up inside of you and clear yourself some space to sit among all of it. Maybe you visualize all of it in boxes within a room, clear them off to the sides (we’re not erasing them or shoving them in hidden closets under lock and key, but simply clearing) and create an area spacious enough to give yourself room to breathe and be amongst all your stuff without feeling overwhelmed by it.

The space you create is useful to give yourself a chance to recalibrate and settle. When you have time that you choose you’d like (or need) to go into one of those issues/boxes, go for it. See what is there for you and what needs addressing – this is an important aspect; that we don’t just leave the stuff there but attend to it at a time we feel more capable and ready- in the meantime, clear space and breathe.

 

There’s one more thing

Another aspect about this season that may be subtly affecting you and bringing up feelings of sadness, instability or uncertainty is the whole ‘new year, new you’ phenomenon. You may be feeling quite resentful or disappointed when looking into your past year, either on the way things did or didn’t pan out or in realizing the goals you didn’t achieve. Maybe you feel anxious looking into the future and trying to figure out the life you want to live and how on earth you’re going to force it to happen.

And that’s just it, we can’t force any of this process. For now, the one and only thing to do is invite acceptance, space and forgiveness into your heart. No one has the answers to fix all that’s going on in your mind and heart but what helps is to really see it, without a lens of judgement or criticism and to find a way to compassionately support yourself through the process (note that seeking counseling or another type of professional support may be incredibly useful and necessary).

 

 Invite acceptance, space and forgiveness into your heart.

 

Ask yourself;

What is something that’s going to nourish you today?
What are some of the goals you did achieve in 2018?
What are some really enjoyable things that happened?
What are you going to release to make more space for the life you really want to live?
What can you do to have some self-reconnection time?

 

We need to release to allow things to unfold, we cannot force anything into manifestation and we cannot force ourselves to magically feel better. Be with what you’re with and support yourself kindly through this time.

Forgive yourself for all that has come and gone; mistakes, “failures” (I believe failures are only opportunities to grow or change direction), your own harsh judgment of yourself, the things you did or didn’t do for others… this list goes on, just forgive, forgive, forgive.

Extend some love and kindness back into your heart towards yourself, then extend it outwards to all that you meet today. It’s only from this place of love, kindness and acceptance that we can then use our reflections to spur us towards healthy and positive changes in the future.

 

My wish for you is a transformational, compassionate and joyful 2019. I’d love to hear how this resonates with you; send me a message on social media here.

 

Author: Simone Da Costa

Image: Sam Jackson Photography

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ashleightc Jan 5, 2019 11:57am

I love the gentle approach of Simone’s article. Her invitation to just clear a little space just to breathe and gain perspective instead of trying to deal with everything at once is so comforting. Often we are so focused on the people and things around us — whether it’s caring for others, forgiving, or mending broken relationships, that we often forget that we need that same attention from ourselves. Thank you for that beautiful reminder that we all need once in a while.

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Simone Da Costa

Yoga teacher and nature lover Simone is currently living in Trinidad and Tobago with frequent travels to the UK in pursuit of her Masters degree in Mindfulness Based Psychotherapy. On one hand she has passion and depth while on the other she has silliness and corny jokes, the combination can be highly entertaining.