Acknowledging your parents’ mortality is challenging. They raised you, helped you through school, and may have even assisted you in caring for your own kids. So, when you’re faced with the task of choosing a nursing home an getting them settled in, you might feel a bit out of your comfort zone.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 1.4 million people call long-term care facilities home. Nursing homes care for your loved ones when they can no longer live at home on their own but don’t require the acute care offered at hospitals. These facilities provide nursing services around the clock, and most provide supportive care such as physical, occupational, and speech therapy.

There are many factors to take into consideration when choosing a nursing facility to create a smooth transition. While you might find the task daunting, it’s not impossible. If you locate the nursing home that’s best for your parents, they might even thank you for it. Here are a few tips that can help you make the best of this new adventure:

Do Your Homework

Listen to the news for any length of time, and you might hear horror stories about nursing home abuse, neglect, or other activities that you don’t want anyone’s parents to experience. While these situations do exist, they aren’t the norm. However, you need to spend some time researching your options to be sure that you choose a nursing home with an excellent rating and no reports of problems in the past.

If your parent is transitioning from the hospital to a facility, the social worker or case manager at the hospital will be able to provide you with a list of nursing homes. If you’re moving your mom or dad from home to a facility, your search will be a bit more independent. The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services provide a tool to help you find and compare Medicare- and Medicaid-certified nursing homes across the country. You can also connect with your local Area Agency on Aging to gather a list of facilities.

A few goals to keep in mind when researching homes include:

• Understanding the kinds of facilities that are available
• Obtaining a clear list of services provided at each nursing home
• Keeping in mind what your parents want most in their new home

Visit Each Facility

Nothing will give you a real understanding of a nursing facility quite like a tour. Call ahead to make an appointment with a staff member who can show you around and discuss any special care needs your parents might have. You can also make an unannounced visit to make sure you got an accurate look at the facility during your visit.

While you’re there, don’t be afraid to ask questions. Speak to staff and residents about how they feel about the care given at the nursing home. Gather information about meals, transportation, and activities as well as medical services provided. Ask to see a standard room so that you know how much space your parents will have once they move in.

Make the Place Feel Like Home

Moving into a nursing home will be a significant change for your parents. The facility will provide a bed, chairs, and other required furniture. To make the place feel a bit more like home, talk to your parents about specific items they might like to take with them.

Pack pictures or small knick-knacks that are important to them. You’ll want to take their favorite clothing, bedding, and other personal items. Many facilities will allow you to decorate for holidays or special occasions, so be sure to plan ahead for these events as well. If your parents enjoy music, pack a CD player and CDs or an MP3 player loaded with their favorite tunes to make their room feel more like home.

Schedule Times to Visit

The transition might be tough, but planning your visits will give your parents something to look forward to and reduce the feelings of homesickness. Many facilities have activities for families such as church on Sundays or bingo on Saturday afternoons. Take a look at the activities calendar to pick one or two events each week that you can attend with your parents. If they can get in and out of the car easily, schedule an outing to a restaurant or family function once a month.

Worrying about others can take a toll on your physical and emotional health. It’s critical that you remember that your mom and dad are cared for by professionals. So when you get home from a visit or a long day at work, take a little time to do some self-care and reduce your stress levels. Read a book, meditate, or go for a walk. If you start to feel too overwhelmed with traveling to the facility and managing work and home, ask for help.

Call your siblings, aunts or uncles, or your parent’s pastor or friends to see if they can visit so that you can get some much-needed rest. While you might feel guilty about it at first, you must remember that you can’t pour from an empty cup. The only way to stay full and rejuvenated is to care for yourself.

Starting a New Adventure

Moving your parents out of your childhood home and into a nursing facility is hard, but it’s not all bad. Once they’re settled in, you might notice that they enjoy the activities, are making new friends, and have been learning a few unexpected life lessons. When you go to visit, you can relax and just enjoy time with the two people who have given you so much. Put these tips into practice, and you’ll have a smooth transition to this new phase of life.