November 17, 2019

Calm Down, Beating Heart. We were All Made for Love.


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The irony of love.⁠

We all crave it. It’s part of being human.⁠

The longing to belong—to be held. To feel needed and valued.⁠

And yet, I see most of us (me included) cowering in the corner. The big cheese of love on the table beckoning us to devour it.⁠

Mouths watering.⁠

We know how good it tastes; we’ve had it before.⁠

Heart beating.⁠

We check our surroundings.⁠

Is it safe?⁠

Can we make it to the table and back without being hurt?⁠
Calm down, beating heart.⁠
The longing overtakes the fear.⁠

Scanning the room, we make a mad dash to the next table leg.⁠
Cowering behind it, sweating as we wait to see if someone saw us wanting the cheese. (That’s not okay, is it? Wanting the cheese all for ourselves?)

Sniff sniff.⁠
Is it safe?⁠

Peering behind the table leg, gazing upward.⁠
There it is.⁠

The big cheese.⁠

Almost all mine.⁠

F*ck, we want it so bad.⁠
I’m also so scared.⁠

Last time, I got hurt.⁠
Last time, it wasn’t so fun.⁠
Last time, I felt sick.⁠

Shall I…?⁠

Is it worth it?⁠
Perhaps just a nibble?⁠

Can’t devour it fully.⁠
That’s not okay.

The moment has come.⁠

Trembling, it’s now or never.⁠

Sh*t, sh*t, sh*t.⁠

Shall I do it?⁠

The cheese, the cheese, we want the cheese so bad.⁠

Ahhh, all these mixed feelings—fear, safety, desire, past experiences resurfacing.

Is it worth it?⁠⠀

You answer that question.⁠⠀
Is big love worth it?⁠⠀
Yep, it’s time for big love, baby.⁠⠀
Let’s get that cheese and devour it without fear.⁠⠀

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