January 19, 2020

Why I’m Not Surrounding Myself with Positive People Only.

The call to surround ourselves with positive people is all over the internet.

Many people around the world are emphasizing the need to hang out with the people who have goals and visions. To keep company with those who push our limits and bring out the best in us. We must stick around with the positive, the optimists, the enthusiasts.

It’s great advice, really. But, I choose not to comply with it.

I have no doubt that the company we choose to keep tremendously affects the state of our minds. And I insist that we must keep the good, positive ones. However, I refuse to believe that I must hang out with a particular category of people in order to remain happy.

Like everyone else, my surrounding has been a combination of “negative” and “positive” people. And, believe it or not, both have played an influential role in my growth and happiness.

In fact, I’ve realized that I should invest in the “negative” people more than the positive ones.

Don’t get me wrong, though. I’m not suggesting to stay with a toxic partner or endure an abusive boss. I’m alluding to the people who find it difficult to see the good in the world. Those who struggle with self-worth and self-confidence. They’re the ones who complain and might laugh a little on the positivity-all-the-way people.

Though I don’t like to label them as “negative,” I know we all have at least one person in our lives whom we might find skeptical or cynical.

The world tells us to stay away from them. I tell you to come closer to them.

That “negative” person might be our partner, best friend, a close colleague, or even a family member. If the world is telling us to withdraw from negativity, then they’re suggesting we turn our backs to our closest ones only because they don’t agree with our vision.

I would like you to know that we’re each others’ mentors. I’ve abundantly learned from the ones who aren’t quite positive in my life. Thankfully, I’ve also been their greatest teacher.

I’d like to believe that we create each other. The positive person has a great impact on the negative person because the positive one was once negative.

If only the positive people kept each other’s company, then the world would be divided into sections. Then no person can contribute in the growth of another. The ones in confusion and pain are the ones who need people the most. They’re waiting for someone to transform them and guide them through the right path.

As we understand the necessity of each other’s company, we must also understand that there’s no pure positivity. Even if we deny it, none of us is one hundred percent satisfied or “positive.” We’re all a little negative inside.

We should stop treating negativity as a plague. When you have contact with a person who you think is negative, approach them with an open mind. Try to benefit them with a new perspective or practice. Share your own experience with them. Instead of running in the opposite direction, try to act out of altruism.

Think of ways that can contribute to their own happiness.

I know it’s challenging, and I understand how energy circulates among people. Oftentimes, we choose not to engage in order not to drain ourselves or become part of the problem. I’m convinced, nonetheless, that we can find ways to work around it.

Have a little time alone to recharge if you feel drained after engaging with a cynical person. Meditate or go for a walk. Most importantly, ruminate on the hope that you have given them. This, alone, should make you feel better.

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