I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m jealous, I’m grateful, I’m bitter.I’m joyful, I’m juicy, I’m sexy, I’m alive. I’m depressed, I’m a bitch, I’m exhausted, I’m ecstatic, I’m blissed and blessed, I’m happy.
I’m an artist, singer, speaker, mother, lover, friend, aunt, enemy, public figure, beloved and be-hated.
I am ill, I am healthy, I am modern, I’m conventional.
I surrender, I rebel, I accept or I disapprove. I like and I don’t.
I am furious and betrayed. I am loved and special.
I speak my truth loud and I swallow my truth.
I lie and I am honest. I am wise and I am stupid. I’m emotional and I’m balanced.
I’m introvert and extrovert.
I love myself and I hate myself.
I am healed and I am broken. I am powerful and I am weak.
I’m a woman. I’m everything and nothing. Sometimes this, sometimes this.
And you are too, dear woman, and don’t EVER!!!! let anyone tell you, that there is something wrong with that.
This is me being me today.
Allowing it and not allowing it. Remembering and forgetting.
If I could say anything to a little girl that I was, I would tell her that this whole struggle is a gift.
“You don’t have to define yourself. You don’t have to be this or that.
You don’t have to be a GOOD GIRL.
Look at yourself!
You are amazing! So special, so loved! There is absolutely nothing wrong with you!!
You don’t like that you feel so much?
It is overwhelming, I know. It is exhausting at times too.
But let me tell you a secret.
This is your biggest power.
This is your greatest gift. You, being able to embrace all that you are and all that you feel, without ANY exception will make you the most radiant human being.
Nothing to be ashamed of.
You worry, that it’s only you like that on the whole planet?
Oh, sweetheart, there are so much more of us out there. It is a nature of being a WOMAN. It’s part of this journey.
And women before you, who’ve been through that, repressed, suppressed, were punished, or punished themselves. Women, who suffered as they were told there something wrong with them.
Women who couldn’t express themselves, as it was dangerous. Women who went through so much pain.
But it’s not you.
You are here now and you will change it, as many other little girls like you.
Just remember how incredible you are. Perfect in every inch. With everything you carry.
What will people say?
Well, they will tell you tones of crap.
That you’re rude, crazy, unworthy. They will try to make you feel small and that you don’t deserve. They will compare you, saying that so many women before you lived that way and they are FINE.
They will tell you, you are egoistic, selfish and daring. That you’re pushy and unwelcomed. That there is something wrong with you. That you are different and you behave entitled.
And that you cannot change the whole world.
But, my dear, oh my dear, you SO CAN. And you will.
You are bigger than you think.
And my beloved child, there will be also people who will support you. With every step you take you have a tremendous support of women from your family, your ancestors.
But also your friends, and other women around the world, who will empower you.
Just promise me this:
You will never believe in any idea that someone will have about you. You know why?
Because you know yourself the best.
And you know the BEST what is the BEST for you!
Noone can know better.
Don’t be afraid.
Be kind and have courage.
Everything else will fall into place.”
We have a full moon and an international Women’s day.
Let’s all write a letter to our little girl and let’s rewrite the past.
We are not broken. We can change everything that happened.
Whatever hurt we’ve been to, abuse, unfairness, betrayal- this doesn’t define us.
We don’t have to BE it.
We so ARE NOT it.
We waste so much time in fixing ourselves, making ourselves better and more perfect. We waste our time believeing that we are not ready for this or that, as we still have something to improve in ourselves.
We keep believing we still need something from the outside to make us whole.
We are WHOLE now and we are ready now- from the place of love and wholeness or love, for money, for happiness, for family, for career, for huge success.
We are ready. And we can do it.
No trauma will define us.
Let’s start living our lives. Let’s do it for ourselves and for next generations.