May 18, 2020

The Wound becomes the Gift: 2 words to Inspire Change.

Change is not easy. That’s why we want others to do it.

We want others to conform to our way of seeing the world, so we can feel more comfortable. The older and more entrenched we are in our perspectives, the more difficult it can be to change.

And yet, when we are willing, really willing, deep fundamental change can happen in a moment. All of the sudden the way we have held a person, situation, or even life itself, can instantly change forever.

This collective experience we are in due to the pandemic is calling for us to change. It has shattered the idea that we can continue to exist from the structures and perspectives that have caused so much harm. This is true with both our internal structures as well as the external ones. Change will not happen in our outer reality, if it is not happening individually, in each of us.

Another word for change is: transformation. Transformation exists the moment we are birthed—we grow, and change, and ultimately transform into the best version of ourselves possible.

Because of my own emotional sensitivity, I have felt acutely aware of the collective fear floating through the ethers. It has forced me to look deeper into my own fear and ask myself: “How can I change this? How can I free myself from ways of seeing and being that lead to fear and conflict? How can I become more peaceful instead of more fearful?”

The current situation reveals our human connectedness beyond doubt. Although we may not be consciously aware of it, we are all affected by the fear, hunger, war, inequality, and toxic pollution that exists on this planet.

What I am learning in my own life is that the conditions that create change are: courage and kindness. It takes courage to let go of our defenses when we believe there is a potential threat. It also takes kindness, and self-compassion to no longer let ourselves be motivated by fear and defensiveness.

“Now, through grace, I see this life I’ve lived has all been for love and to finally recognise my power to bless and forgive all things.” 

This is a line I wrote for a story about my life entitled: “The Wound Becomes The Gift.” It is something I aspire to achieve. How do we allow our wounds to become the gifts they are meant to be? For me, it is through the power of forgiveness. Forgiveness—like change of any kind, is not easy, but it holds tremendous power to free us to become who we are meant to be.

Peace, I have found, is the alternative to fear and anger. And although sometimes it doesn’t feel like it—peace is a choice we make. It is the choice to surrender our position and end the war. When we take a closer look, we see conflict within ourselves is between the part of us that wants peace, and the part of us that believes we need to hold on to our defenses and perspective to avoid further hurt. It is often only when the fear or loss become so overwhelming, that we make the choice to surrender our stance and choose peace. But we shouldn’t have to wait anymore.

Now is that time. Let’s support each other to release our fears, and awaken the innate capacity of our hearts to truly live by courage and kindness. Only then will we know peace. Only then will we know change.


I invite you to join me, beginning next week for the Virtual Circles, “Awakening The Heart” , a four-part co-creative series that will support and uplift us all.

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