August 17, 2020

I Will Attempt to Hold Myself—Even if Unsuccessful.


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I will attempt to hold myself today even if I am unsuccessful.

I will say hi to myself in the mirror even if it doesn’t say hi back.

I will turn on the shower and wash my brown hair once again even when nobody will see it, and I will make my bed even if I can’t wash the sheets.

Today is another day of sadness.

I wish I could befriend it—but I can’t.

So I eat chocolate instead, sip on coffee, and write another poem in mascara on the sheets of an unfamiliar bed.

I’ve been told, “this too shall pass.”

I’ve been encouraged to befriend the sadness.

Maybe I will—but not today.

Maybe there is something more to learn.

Maybe this will pass as they say.

Maybe one day the mirror will say hi back.

Right now though, my eyes reflect the emptiness of my soul, and the only thing that is passing is time.

I hope I feel better tomorrow.

I am sure I will.

It is going to be Monday after all.

Right now though, I’m unsuccessful in holding myself.

It’s okay though.

Nobody is watching.

They’re only reading.

Good night, world.


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