Have you ever gone to sleep for the sole purpose of escaping your painful reality?
It was one of those nights I was too exhausted to speak.
Although I was mute, my mind was loud. My house was a mess, and so was my life. So much to do, yet nowhere to be.
I clung to a past that no longer existed. And felt every emotion I had only ever resisted. As I lay in my bed drowning in tears, I had never felt lower in all my years. Waking up to some peace felt so far away. Little did I know, it would come the next day.
It was dark, cold, and icy as I was driving nowhere fast. I couldn’t see two feet in front of me as I was running out of gas. My headlights were as dim as the light I felt within. No one was there to save me as my vehicle began to spin. I landed in a ditch not so far away. Though I was barely living, I didn’t want to go this way.
Water flooded through the windows and I was drowning in a pool. And although no one could hear me, I screamed “help me” like a fool.
I was still alive but barely breathing when I heard a deep voice say “Only God can save you! You just need to pray.”
In my quiet desperation with a mustard seed of faith, I said “Dear God, please help me. I want to live another day.”
An instant peace reigned over me before it was too late. The darkness turned to light and it felt like heaven’s gate.
I woke up the next morning and got the message loud and clear. I finally found the strength to begin to persevere.
Now no matter where life takes me—whether skies are blue or gray—the first thing I make sure to do is to get on my knees to pray.