October 10, 2022

Time Alone won’t Heal Us: 7 Easy Steps to Get Over an Ex.


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It was easy falling in love.

It took all but seconds for the attraction to kickstart my heart. I looked into his eyes and I knew he was the one for me. I didn’t have to try to convince myself—I was attracted to him. I wanted more.

There was no denying our chemistry from the start. The excitement that bubbled in the pit of my soul when I saw him. The way my eyes lit up every time he was near me. And the butterflies that erupted when he touched me.

We swiftly fell into a relationship where we developed a connection. My heart intertwined with his.

It was easy falling in love with him.

Then, when I least expected it, it was over and everything changed.

I was standing there, alone, not knowing how to move on from the person who was my world.

If only getting over someone was as easy as falling in love. 

It took me years to get over him. The process was slow and torturous. I couldn’t get a grip on what I was supposed to do to make it to the other side. And I made it worse on myself by constantly calling and texting him.

He was all I thought about. And I refused to move on.

Time was moving along and I felt just as heartbroken as the day he left. I also experienced new levels of heartbreak each time I saw or spoke with him after our relationship ended.

I thought time was supposed to heal a broken heart…

But the truth is, time alone won’t heal us if we are not actively doing the work to get over the other person. Getting over someone can be easy if we actively work toward healing along the way. And with time, we will heal.

Easy doesn’t mean it will take a day, a week, or even a month to get over someone though. Easy isn’t about time. Easy is about the complexity of the steps we take to get closer to healing. It doesn’t have to be hard. We are in control of how to actively move the f*ck on.

If we create realistic steps that are simple to follow, we can fall out of love as easily as it was to fall in love.

Our journey to getting over someone begins with us. We must travel alone in order to find and create our own path to healing.

Here are seven easy steps to getting over an ex:

1. Delete and block him from your phone and all social media accounts. He doesn’t exist in your life anymore.

This is the easiest thing to do. Just hit delete and block, everywhere. The less contact we have with someone over time, their memory begins to fade and our heart begins to heal.

2. Put one foot in front of the other. You can function on your own.

Even if you have to mentally tell yourself to move, right foot then left foot, all that matters is you actively move forward. Once you do, your life will follow.

3. Start and end each day reminding yourself that you will get through this. You’re stronger than you realize.

It may not feel like it at this moment but you’ve been through worse. You can handle this.

4. Every time you look in the mirror, say “I love you.” Say it out loud.

Then remind yourself that you have so many people in your life who love you as well. You’re not in this alone.

5. Do one new thing each day. Even something simple.

Simple can be ordering tea instead of coffee. But do something you’ve never done before. If you’re a planner, be spontaneous, or say no when you would normally say yes. The point is to try new things.

6. Make new memories. Your life is moving forward.

These new memories will replace the old ones you shared with your ex, and eventually they will become the only ones that matter.

7. Open your heart to love again. Someone amazing is coming.

Sometimes just believing in love again is enough to welcome the possibilities.

One day, soon, you will look back and smile because you did it. You let go.

Getting over someone can be easy if we untangle ourselves from our old life, one step at a time.


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