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Do you know someone who is having a rough go?
Or perhaps you have a friend or loved one who is struggling due to a physical ailment, mental health condition, or challenging circumstance?
Most likely, you do.
We all do.
Many of us can be quick to extend a helping hand, our love, and prayers.
But what about those people who never ask for help. We may not even know they need our support.
I know that many of us carry the “I can take care of myself” mentality. Acting like we can do it all could feel like second nature when we’ve held down the forte for so long or never felt like we could depend on anyone. We may think that asking for help is also a sign of weakness.
We may also believe that our issues are not significant. We can compare ourselves to others, ignoring our own needs because we don’t want to appear as a burden. The thing is, if you’ve felt this way before, most likely, others have too.
We also have those sh*tty days when we just don’t feel like getting out of bed.
Perhaps we just lost our job. Maybe someone hurt us deeply and our hearts are shattered in pieces. Or we’re just simply exhausted and desperately need to rest and recharge our batteries.
We may feel isolated and hopeless and seek refuge alone to find comfort.
Without really meaning to, we can shut people out.
How can we support our friends and loved ones who never ask for help? Here are two ways to let them know that you care:
Reach out and check in.
Whether it’s a phone call, text, or voicemail, reaching out and checking in regularly not only provides comfort on both ends, but it simply keeps communication open. Healthy relationships are designed to be an equal exchange of give and take. Both people are working together toward a common goal. When you offer a check-in, the giver feels content in knowing that the person is okay. The receiver feels acknowledged and supported.
Here are texts that I often use to check in or to show support:
“Just checking in and thinking about you.”
“Do you need anything?”
“Want to grab a coffee sometime?”
“If you need to vent, I’m here.”
“I’m sorry you’re going through this right now.”
“I’m here if you need me.”
The person receiving the text may not want to talk or need anything, but it sends the message that someone cares and is available if need be.
When checking in on my aunt who lives alone and doesn’t text, I’ll usually leave a voicemail saying, “Hi, just checking in, and wanted to see how you’re doing. Call me when it’s good for you.” Sometimes she’ll call me back in a day or two, but either way, she gets back to me.
Or, you can call and say, “Hey, I’m running to the store and wanted to check in to see if you needed anything.” If she’s having a difficult week and truly can’t grab groceries, then I’ll try to make sure she knows someone can help.
You can also check in with light humor. Whether it’s a good joke, TikTok video, or even a silly photo of yourself, never underestimate the power of a hearty laugh. Sometimes it’s the most random, hilarious texts that bring people closer and snap someone out of a funk.
Based on your own strengths and activities you enjoy, ask yourself what you can share with others. Drop offs are simply leaving items that you believe may be helpful to them.
Do you make something healthy that you can share with others?
For me, I love making healthy soups and homemade bread. My close friends and family know that when I make a ton of soup, I don’t freeze the leftovers. Someone will usually find it on their porch the next day. Another fun activity I enjoy is making bread with my girls. You can find tons of easy recipes, and once you add your signature herbal mix, you’re all set.
Expressing love and care through creativity is also a wonderful way to show that you care. Including a handwritten personal note or homemade card can add that personal touch and help with feeling more connected. Hearing “your voice” may lessen someone’s feelings of isolation and loneliness. You can share a fun memory, tell them how much you appreciate them, or just simply say you’re thinking of them.
When we extend our efforts, even in the simplest of ways, we open the gates to normalize support. We help others progress a little more forward and pave the way for brighter days.
Acts of kindness no longer just occur at certain times of the year but rather become habitual and a natural part of our lives.
When we all reach out and show our love and support, we all benefit.
Check in or do a drop off with someone you care about today.