I straddle two worlds: the wild one and the technological one. My life often feels like a paradox. Am I alone on this?

On good days, I am a bridge, inspired by nature to invent technology solutions for protecting the Earth and humanity.

On tough days, I suffer from an identity crisis: a suburban, laptop-bound traitor to my wild self, or a squishy, salty forest-lover wrapped up in feelings and spirituality instead of the hard science needed to solve problems at scale.

Are these two ways of being in conflict?

Is there a path that finds balance as we navigate and enjoy the modern world without losing track of the unprovable, felt sense of being “one with nature” that was reality for our ancestors for 99.9% of human history?

I read once that the mind is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master.

How do we stay connected to our heart and our ancient wild wisdom without getting lost into the prison of the mind?

So I look to nature for her guidance.

I look through the photo albums on my phone, trying to find pictures I’ve taken while on my wilderness journeys. But I’m most struck by an image not from my adventures to a wild place, but rather from a luxury resort on a Mediterranean island.

I see a seagull at sunset, perched on the edge of a heated infinity pool, enjoying the warm water on its feet. I am that bird. I am wild and free.

I am most alive in nature. But I also love my creature comforts. I am grateful for the wisdom of this gull, who surely does not suffer from the identity crisis like I do.

Maybe balance is the way?

Not one path or the other. I do not need to fit neatly into a single box. My soul exists outside of the limitations of language and its labels.