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{*Did you know you can write on Elephant? Here’s how—big changes: How to Write & Make Money or at least Be of Benefit on Elephant. ~ Waylon}

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We all want to be happy.

We want to feel light and free and filled with happiness.

We want to feel peaceful. We want to feel good. We want life to feel good.

The truth is, life isn’t always going to feel good. We’ll have days that feel wonderful and days that feel challenging. We’ll go through painful experiences. If we can accept this, it will help us move through life with more ease. We’ll feel lighter, more at peace.

We can learn so much about ourselves through being present and connecting deeply with ourselves, through cultivating awareness.

And with awareness, we can see the things that cause us unhappiness—the things that are making us unhappy.

Here are 15 things that are making you unhappy:

1. Lack of self-awareness

2. Not being true to yourself

3. Resisting what is (not accepting what is)

4. Not honoring how you feel

5. Self-criticism

6. People-pleasing

7. Clinging to a sense of control

8. Setting unrealistic expectations for yourself

9. Not examining your thoughts, beliefs, and patterns

10. Clinging to external validation

11. Avoiding sitting with difficult feelings

12. Thinking you’ll only be happy if your life looks a certain way

13. Giving into knee-jerk reactions and impulses

14. Thinking external things will bring you happiness

15. Not being present

There are so many things we do that cause us unhappiness, so many things that add to our suffering. A lot of this is unconscious, stems from things we may not even be aware of, things that reside in our subconscious.

That’s why it’s so important to cultivate self-awareness. That’s why it’s important to sit with ourselves, observe our thoughts, and get to know our patterns. The more we’re able to observe ourselves, the more we’ll learn about ourselves, about our thoughts, habits, beliefs, and tendencies. And with this awareness, we’ll be able to choose more intentionally how we want to move in the world.

Through going inward, we can connect more deeply to ourselves.

We can find the lightness that comes from being present, from accepting that we are where we are. We can find joy and appreciation for the little things. We can connect to our hearts and what is important to us. We can pursue the things that are meaningful to us.

We can shift our thoughts and beliefs and reframe how we view ourselves and the world.

We can see the ways we’ve been holding ourselves back without even realizing it.

We can discover deeper layers of who we are, go beneath thoughts and beliefs and knee-jerk impulses.

We can cultivate an ability to be with all of life’s experiences, hold space for everything that happens in life. We can begin to let go of what we no longer want to carry; we can open ourselves to what is possible.

We can change the way we experience the world.

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