The True Essence Of Sexiness Lies Within You.

By Luisa Diaz, Author of Sexy is Timeless: Ten Timeless Sexy Assets That Lie within You

The true essence of sexiness goes beyond physicality. Self-worth lies within you. You may be asking, How can I find my true essence of sexiness? Well, here are ten easy tips to discover the ten timeless sexy assets that lie within you:

Find self-confidence. Confidence is synonymous with assertiveness, poise, courage and boldness. You gain confidence in the doing. Preparation gives you confidence. For example, when you go to interview for a job, and you know all about the company, you feel comfortable talking about the company. When you study hard for a test, you feel confident when you take it. Confidence is gained by knowledge, preparation, and self-discovery.
Never stop learning. Knowledge is sexy, and being a well-rounded person is an attractive attribute. I believe in the journey of education. You can continue to be curious about the world, and learn anything by simply researching on the internet. It’s eye-opening to learn about different cultures and how their music, cuisine, art, and more impact the world around us. Invest time in learning about yourself as well. There are so many self-improvement books out there, but one of my favorites is The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. It really opened my eyes about my own abilities for success.
Laugh more! There is nothing sexier than a woman who can laugh at herself because she doesn’t take herself too seriously. Honest laughter comes from a confident place within yourself, so don’t be shy. Smile and laugh when you think something is funny. A beautiful smile radiates warmth. For example, when you are out with your date and he says something funny, don’t be shy to laugh and tell him how funny it was. Everybody appreciates an honest compliment. Also, a good laugh releases stress and helps you look fabulous. Like Marilyn Monroe said, “a smile is the best makeup any girl can wear.”
Be kind to yourself and others. Everybody needs kindness, especially in this day and age. I do believe that kindness is cool, because I see its impact every day. I was recently at a Yankees game, and I saw a man try to catch a ball. He caught it, but then gave it away to a little girl who also tried so hard to catch it. He didn’t have to give away the ball that he caught for himself, but out of the kindness of his heart, he gave it to the little girl and made her day. Kindness is a virtuous behavior since it is considerate of others. Be kind with your words because you never know what people are going through in their personal lives. Be kind to your surroundings as well, and if you have time, volunteer for a charity that you believe in.
Don’t just hear—listen. There is a difference between hearing and listening. Hearing is just our natural response to the sense of sound, regardless of whether or not we want to hear something. Listening requires paying attention and concentrating on processing meaning from words and sentences. Everybody is talking, but who is really listening? Truly listening to others means that you care. When you care, you are showing kindness, and that is very sexy. Remember, that people will reveal to you who they are if you just listen.
Take care of yourself, darling. Our physical, mental, and emotional health are all connected and support one another. Taking care of these aspects in your life will increase the likelihood that you stay well, feel confident, and feel fabulous. Essential hygiene, like brushing your teeth, taking a shower, and wearing clean clothes, all go beyond the surface and show that you have a good image of yourself. Declutter not only your closet, but also your social circle. Surround yourself with family and friends who love and support you. Take time for relaxation. Do whatever relaxes you, such as private prayer, yoga, getting a massage, painting, journaling, listening to your favorite music, or simply strolling in the park. Also, keeping in touch with your inner child helps you stay youthful.
Make time to dance. Dancing has been scientifically proven to be a form of relaxation and improves a variety of brain functions. To awaken the spirit of dance inside of you, you can start by listening to your favorite music and let it move you–just shake it, darling! Dancing comes down to self-expression, and there are a variety of styles that you can try out and find what you like best.  Anyone can dance, so don’t feel shy or insecure. If you are enjoying yourself while moving to the music and having fun, that is sexy, and it makes people want to join you. Fun is contagious. You don’t have to dance like you’re on Dancing With The Stars or twerk like Cardi B. Just keep your poise, and have some fun—that is very sexy!
Just be you! Individuality is very sexy because it is the quality that makes you unique and sets you apart from others—you are one of a kind. Embrace whatever your personal style is. You express your individuality through your self-confidence in how you wear your unique choice of clothes through your strong sense of self. Trust your intuition as you discover your own personal style. Make a list of the things that you love to wear, go to, and be part of. For example, if you love the theater, that might make you want to be part of a theater community. Individuality is expressed in the way you speak, behave, accessorize, and carry yourself. Embrace whatever you love with confidence and enjoy it. Remember, darling, “in order to be irreplaceable, one must be different” (Coco Chanel).
Embrace your femininity. Try to get a mani and pedi every week. Take advantage of the many makeup tutorials on YouTube to find the look that best accentuates your natural beauty. It doesn’t have to be full glam makeup–it can be as simple as mascara, the right powder or cream, and a little color for your lips. Femininity also goes beyond girly things like flowery dresses and pink nails—it is about being free to be yourself, love and be loved, be kind, accept others, want the best for others, and care for others. A woman can be strong and assertive while still being confident in her femininity. I believe that in today’s society, a woman is completely capable of running a multi-million dollar business in her high heels and lipstick. Femininity is one of the most powerful assets that you possess as a woman–so embrace it, darling.
Mind your manners. Manners and courtesy still have a place in our society, and you can exercise  your social graces by more than just knowing how to use the right fork at dinner time. It goes beyond that, and also covers politeness and punctuality. You don’t have to be rude to people. Instead, make an effort to be considerate and kind to others by respecting their time and feelings. Those are the most important social graces that you can possess in your life. They are acceptable in all social settings, regardless of nationalities and economic backgrounds. Kindness is appreciated by everyone, and it goes a long way. Kindness is cool!

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