It’s Really F*cking Hard to Stick Together.

Via on Jun 13, 2011

Is Long Lasting Love Dead?

What if we can capture some of these great, beautiful pieces of history before they are gone? And what if these stories help inspire others to live their own?

There was a time when you fell in love, you made a commitment and you stuck with it. Times are different now. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. We just need to pay close attention.

When travelers go and look at buildings in Europe they know that they are beautiful –they look in awebecause they represent a romantic era when things were different. They will never be built like that again. That’s what has happened to love, in a way. It’s as if  ‘We just don’t build them like that anymore’…

We need to capture our own love’s history in order to help preserve and write our future. And we can’t do it alone.”

~ DJ Pierce, Co-Founder, Global Glue Project

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Global Glue Project’s mission is to help communities recognize the value of their great love stories and initiate a love preservation movement.  GGP wants to hear your story, your parents story, your grandparents story.  GGP wants you to go and video the sweet old couple who lives down the street from you and still goes for walks hand in hand.  They are collecting stories, and need to hear yours – because there is someone out there who needs to hear what you have to say, and it just might be the “glue” they need to hear to help them out in their own partnerships.

“Everybody that has somebody, has a story.  Everybody knows somebody with love, and can encourage them to tell their story. When you focus on the struggle people go through and see why some people stick together and some people don’t – that is what makes this unique.” ~ DJ Pierce

I interviewed DJ Pierce on his birthday.  Our 30 minute interview turned into a four hour pow-wow of sharing, laughing and feeling like we had brightened up each others corners of the world a little bit.  I shared with DJ that my parents are divorced.  My mom re-married after a scandalous affair that continues to show it’s ugly face.  My dad also re-married and the state of their relationship is ok, on their best day.  I have been in a relationship for five years and at times I feel a little lost. Where do I look for examples? Who has stuck it out and able to share what it takes to stick together.

Enter Global Glue Project, a call for action to preserve the great love stories of our time before they go extinct.

“This is like the great glacier melt – you see a glacier in 1920 and it is this massive glacier and now it is gone. My great grandparents were married for 80 years. This type of commitment is becoming extinct in our society,” says DJ.

DJ and his sister Gillian have joined forces to record and archive the sweet, rich and challenging tales and truths from the mouths of people who are living it, or have lived it and can share what they have learned. DJ and Gillian, both hailing from Boulder, CO (DJ travels back and forth from Boulder to New York City and works as an Executive Creative Director) have made their mission to find these endangered relationships and create a lasting memory of their story through video and media, so they have a place in history, forever.  The future database will serve as a learning tool for the community at large, to interface with advice from those who have found the “glue”, shared their story and now, through GGP, has found a living and breathing museum of the dying art of commitment.

“There is the component of preserving the wisdom from the 80 year marriages that are going extinct ( such as my great grandparents), that is one piece (of the project).  But, there is also this other component about the people out there that are perhaps newly together and are trying to make it work and could use community support to find inspiration. In terms of relationships, as far as support goes, there is therapy and self-help books, I don’t personally know of a resource of actual experience; how everyday couples that you admire make it work and a place to go to hear the wisdom they have to share.” ~ Gillian Pierce

I asked both DJ and Gillian a question posed to me by Elephant Journal founder, Waylon Lewis, in a recent interview about his thoughts on Global Glue.  He wanted to see what was behind “glue.”  What was the project going to do to support growth that is necessary for a healthy relationship in the individual and not just the “couple.”  Both of the visionaries behind GGP were passionate about sharing the importance of the individual path in a healthy relationship.

Gillian shares, “In my own experience, the only way to have meaningful relationship  by honoring yourself and honoring your partner at the same time.  The mission of GGP is not sticking together just for the sake of to sticking  together.  It is about  doing it joyfully and in a healthy way so that you’re both on your best individual path.  Some of this is in a a response to studies that say we are happier in relationships. For sure, this is a huge part of it.”

Global Glue Project at the Hanuman Festival in Boulder, CO June 16th-19th


GGP + Hanuman Festival: a match made in heaven.  Come check out the GGP Love Booth in the Vendor Village where you can give a shout out for love, get some GGP gear and go on camera to share your story and the glue that keeps you together.

A Hanuman Honeymoon?  The Global Glue Love Stunt (and a love story)

Jason Magness and Chelsea Gribbon fell in love.  As DJ tells it, “I will never forget when I saw Jason just after he met Chelsea.  You could just tell there was something different about him.  He looked at me and just said, ‘I’m done.  I met the one.”

Jason and Chelsea are two of the forces behind Yoga Slackers, a team of eco-extreme-adventure yogis. They both practice yoga, sometimes on a slack line.  As I write this post, the two are tying the knot in California.  Less than one week after they say their vows, they will take another vow for GGP and the Hanuman Community.  They will vow to maintain physical contact for 36 hours. On Friday evening at the Gratitude Gathering Dinner , they will ceremoniously come together. The stunt is metaphorical illustration of how it can be a challenge for couples to face struggles head on and stick together despite them. GGP and the Hanuman Media team will document the entire 24 hour period from bathroom breaks to the much awaited acro/partner yoga demonstrations they are so well known for. “They have to be in the act of touching – it is about connection and trust,” says DJ of his newlywed friends.

Let’s Build a Love Preservation Movement

Call your Grandma and get your Flip Camera out.  GGP would love nothing more than to begin hearing your stories, from you and by you.  Until the website is launched, you can upload or share videos on their Facebook Page. Lets begin to build, preserve and learn from the great love stories that are around us, while they are still here. Here are a few questions that can help you get started. Just feel it out and watch where the love grows.

  1. How long have you been together?
  2. What is the hardest thing you have ever been through?
  3. What is the glue that has kept you together?

“LOVE is a big industry.  GGP is trying to celebrate the truth about what it takes to stick together and it is really fucking hard.” ~ DJ Pierce

Gillian and DJ back in the day.

DJ shares of what it is like to work with his sis, “Every brother and sister goes through a period of Divine Hatred – close as kids, then grew apart and are now very close.  She took me to my first yoga conference.  We have a lot of the same passions in life.  She is very much a big reason why I want to do this (GGP).  Both of us having real experience of tumultuous relationships of our own, we both recognized how much it takes to have something successful. I personally feel very lucky to be doing something with my family.  Who is closer than your family?”

About Jessica Durivage

Whether in a business suit, on a yoga mat or a meditation cushion, Jessica will follow her Dharma to the ends of the earth and work to bridge the gap with the world and the light that dwells within each being.  Grateful for the wealth of experiences, teachers and mentors who have guided her along her path as a yogi, a business woman, a non-profiteer and an improv comedian; she cultivates mindful, savvy and innovative approaches to make the world a better place each day and lead with compassion, from the heart (and trying not to take herself too seriously). / Jessica is the founder and owner of Where is My Guru - an ever evolving work of life that encompasses writing, art, community, leadership, consulting and a weekly radio show where you can find her contemplating Purusha, Prakriti, the Yoga Sutras and why all Yogis are crazy mo fo's. Check in with the Where is My Guru Blog and the radio show on Fridays at 11am EST - www.whereismygurunow.com

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8 Responses to “It’s Really F*cking Hard to Stick Together.”

  1. [...] latest Hanuman article came from the wonderful Jessica Durivage. Jessica digs into The Global Glue Project, asking the hard questions like, “Is long lasting love dead?” Global Glue will be at [...]

  2. Don says:

    What a thought-provoking and timely article, Jessica! My buddy and I used to talk about the evolution of relationships and monogamy. These talks came after both of our divorces, which happened to be within a year of each other.

    The Global Glue Project is on the right track for bringing back love and how to keep your commitments to each other. I see a similar track between relationships and choosing a career. When I was in high school, the career guidance and development was practically non-existent. I chose my career based on what I thought would be recession-proof, not on what my talents were or what I enjoyed doing.

    Who better to teach creating and keeping loving relationships than those that have created and kept loving relationships? Then taking those stories and using them to teach us how to love again, unconditionally. Especially those of us who have forgotten or may have never learned what it takes to sustain a relationship. What a powerful project for these times!

    • Gillian Pierce Gillian says:

      Well said Don, thank you. That is the project in a nutshell- learning from the experience of those who have actually made it work- and sharing and preserving that knowledge. So few of us today have good role models for long-term relationships- so we are taking those relationship role models into the digital age for us all to gain guidance. I'M 4 LOVE!

  3. From Facebook:

    Nara Campbell For two people to stay together for so long, they must possess divine qualities of selflessness, compassion, courage, honesty and so forth. Plus a sense of responsibility and commitment. In Kali Yuga, it seems these qualities are rapidly disappearing. There's no self-discipline, no patience, no desire to make sacrifices, or to make compromises. It's all "me me me" now. Even if one of the couple tries to keep it together, sometimes the other commits acts that's almost impossible for the one to tolerate. Like alcoholism, or the like, incest, physical abuse, and so on.
    7 hours ago · Like · 2 people

    Nara Campbell just my musings…
    7 hours ago · Like · 1 person

    Evelyn Ruut It is all a matter of expectations. If you expect your spouse to fill all your expectations you are doomed to dissatisfaction. If you come to a marriage with tolerance and compassion for another human being with faults just like you, and with understanding their vulnerability, which is just like yours, it helps.
    6 hours ago · Like · 1 person

    Jessica Durivage These are such great reflections, Nara and Evelyn! I encourage you both to get on Global Glue Project and share your thoughts! This in an inquiry, and is based only on the examples, feedback and thoughts we receive from you.
    6 hours ago · Like

    Belinda B. Barnes Sweet – I'm a lucky one, I've married to my man for 27 years…met him when I was 18-19 years old, he was 24, we have 5 children and I still love him like crazy. He makes me coffee and brings it to me in bed every morning before we both zip off to work work work. I think its about kindness, honesty, and really thinking of your mates needs before your own everyday. He comes from great stock though-his parents and grandparents on both his parents sides were married till death do us part. ♥
    5 hours ago · Like · 1 person

    Jessica Durivage Beautiful!! Please help us to share this important work! I love your story!
    5 hours ago · Like

    Jessica Durivage ‎Megan Marini Gillian Pierce DJ Pierce – These are great comments for GLUE!
    5 hours ago · Like

    Janet Rossy Quinn Approaching 29 years of marriage, but a total of 33 years together, I would say it takes commitment to get through the hard times, and you have to be clear on that and remember it when going through a rough patch. People change in the course of time, you have to accept it, because you yourself have changed as well. Understanding and kindness, and knowing that hard times do pass are the key, in my opinion.
    about an hour ago · Like · 1 person

    R Aimée Cruz-Báez I think ppl don't last because they don't know the meaning of commitment, and the foundation is weak, based on material principles therefore when there's a challenge…like a disposal…they bail out…ppl are not pieces of furniture or toothpaste that when used you dispose…you are together united and committed for a journey into infinity
    25 minutes ago · Like · 1 person

    Jessica Durivage ‎Bob Weisenberg – the comments here are so great! Can we get them posted on Ele? Thank you for sharing this today! You breathed life back into this article! I appreciate it!
    7 minutes ago · Like

    elephantjournal.com Hi, Jessica. Believe it or not you can just copy and paste this whole stream into a comment, but first you have to expand all the "Some More"'s. I'll show you right now.
    a few seconds ago · Like

    • Bob! Thank you so much for posting these! I see how can post them. Didn't know if it had to come from EJ. MISSING YOU today at Hanuman. Wish you were here – but excited to see you in a few weeks. xox

      • Nope, you can do it yourself anytime you like.

        Have fun at Hanuman. Somebody has to stay back at the Fort! Even Colin, our IT guru from Scotland is there, I hear from Waylon.

        Bob

  4. [...] others. Are we to define a new way of being in relationship with others? Are we supposed to find “the one?” Are we to continue the roller coaster of marriage and divorce? Deep in my heart, I believe that [...]

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