Global Visual Culture

Via Jeffrey Woodruff
on Dec 27, 2010
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[editor’s note: the article below may be fictitious.]

Science and Technology Office of the President

Dot matrix printers are obsolete
In an effort to boost global technology spend, the US Government’s CTO, Aneesh Chopra declares the dot matrix printers obsolete. Aneesh entertained several proposals from technology election contributors, including eliminating the use of  9-volt batteries and LPT1. Aneesh believes the planned obsolescence of dot matrix printing will significantly boost technology spend.

Bill summary and impact
Republicans and Tea Party advocates have added their own provisions:  font obsolescence- the retirement of Times New Roman and Arial- and enabling kerning by default.

US Ranks 40th for Innovation
The US ranks fortieth globally on the innovation cure and this bill may improve America’s ranking. The details of the Chief Technology Officer’s announcement, while slated for a news conference in the Bay Area were superseded by advance publication on Wiki Leaks.

[reminder editor’s note: the article above may be fictitious.]

Related news:
Slate article: Space Invaders: Why you should never, ever use two spaces after a period.
The WSJ recent report on technology obsolescence.

Courtesy of Walker Fine Arts


About Jeffrey Woodruff

Jeffrey is a competitive cross country skier and marathon runner. He has completed sixteen marathons in six countries. Jeffrey recently received his Master of Architecture at the University of Colorado Denver.


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