It’s Gettin’ Real in the Whole Foods Parking Lot.

Via Waylon Lewis
on Jun 13, 2011
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Update: at only 300 views, we’ve been tipped off and jumped on their latest: Yoga Girl, going viral too!

I predict viral video.

“I’m in electric mode; can’t even hear the engine (sshhhhhhh…..)”

First there was Inappropriate Yoga Guy.

Then there was Illest Buddhist.

Now, there’s a Clipper cap wearing white boy rappin fun at this buster on his iPhone talking to his friends / Picking up some cayenne pepper for his master cleanse…the most annoying dude I’ve ever seen brah…Could you please move, you’re right in front of the Quinoa. And then you put your 6 things for $80 bucks in your mini shopping cart, and you’re off.




Intro (spoken)

Yo man…
Yo I know you see me here dude!!
I’ve been waiting here like 10 minutes, man!
No, no no… this is MY parking space man.
What you need to do is put your little hybrid in reverse,
And go out the way you came in.
Yo its about to get REAL in the Whole Foods parking lot man…

Chorus (with feeling)

It’s getting’ REAL in the Whole Foods Parking Lot
I got my STEEL and you know it gets sparked a lot
Im on my grind homie… It’s on my mind homie!
These fools with clip boards are lookin’ at me like they know me!

It’s getting’ REAL in the Whole Foods Parking Lot
You know the DEAL with the little shopping carts they got…
Check out what I say, it happens every day…
It’s how we LIVE on the west side of LA!!

Verse 1

… Im ridin’ slow in my Prius…
all leather, tinted windows… you cant see us!!
Everybody’s trying to park, you can feel the tension
I’m in electric mode… can’t even hear the engine (Shhhhhhh)

Just then I saw a spot open up,
My timings perfect… Im creepin’ up…
But then this other dude tried to steal it going the wrong way
Yo man, I’ve had a LONG DAY!

(same as before)

Verse 2

Now I’m on this inside, looking at my list
Organic chicken, Kale Salad and a Lemon Twist.
Some girl in yoga pants is lookin at me funny
I’m just trying to find a decent Pinot Noir for under twenty!

Then I take it to the cheese counter, Humboldt Fog?
We just ran out sir! Really Dog?
Take it easy man, I try to calm myself…
I’ve been on edge ever since they took Kombucha off the shelf…


(same as before)

Verse 3

This Busters on his iPhone talking to his friends,
Picking up some cayenne pepper for his master cleanse.
You’re the most annoying dude I’ve ever SEEN brah…
Could you PLEASE move? You’re RIGHT in front of the Quinoa.

Damn, I’m about to check out.
Pay my 80 bucks for 6 things and get the heck out.
The express lane is moving hella slow…
Man, these fools don’t know… that shit is getting REAL….

(same as before)


About Waylon Lewis

Waylon Lewis, founder of elephant magazine, now & host of Walk the Talk Show with Waylon Lewis, is a 1st generation American Buddhist “Dharma Brat." Voted #1 in U.S. on twitter for #green two years running, Changemaker & Eco Ambassador by Treehugger, Green Hero by Discovery’s Planet Green, Best (!) Shameless Self-Promoter at Westword's Web Awards, Prominent Buddhist by Shambhala Sun, & 100 Most Influential People in Health & Fitness 2011 by "Greatist", Waylon is a mediocre climber, lazy yogi, 365-day bicycle commuter & best friend to Redford (his rescue hound). His aim: to bring the good news re: "the mindful life" beyond the choir & to all those who didn't know they gave a care. | His first book, Things I would like to do with You, is now available.


16 Responses to “It’s Gettin’ Real in the Whole Foods Parking Lot.”

  1. Ang says:

    ADORE this!!!

  2. laurie says:

    If they moved this song to the whole foods in Greenwich, CT the prius would be replaced with SUVs and the carts would be supersized.

  3. […] …in the Whole Foods Parking Lot. […]

  4. Barbara says:

    I love fun songs and that is defiantly fun (and pretty true)

  5. Maria says:

    Funniest thing I've seen in ages. Classic!!

  6. dishelle says:

    Gotta get my Humbolt Fog!

  7. […] It’s Gettin’ Real in the Whole Foods Parking Lot […]

  8. […] It’s not young models exercising with pastel backgrounds before they get back into their SUV and pop by Whole Foods to grab some quinoa for their 1.8 children. What is […]

  9. […] It’s gettin’ real in tha Whole Foods Parking Lot: […]

  10. elephantjournal says:

    They changed their policy about two years ago. We'd actually complained about it, so they let us know!

  11. eye84x says:

    I worked at Whole Foods for 9 years, all over the country. I wouldn't shop there now without the 20% employee discount which brings their prices down to almost normal. $80 for 6 things is actually factual.

  12. […] Girl” fame does it again. “Berkeley Enough”. Click here for It’s Gettin’ Real in the Whole Foods Parking Lot click here for Yoga Girl. We caught both early on, when they were at 300 views on youtube, and […]

  13. Posted AGAIN! to Elephant Journal on Facebook cos it's TOO DAMNED GOOD.

    Braja Sorensen
    Lost & Found in India
    Editor, Elephant Spirituality
    Like Elephant Journal on Facebook

  14. […] First there was It’s Gettin’ Real in tha Whole Foods Parking Lot. […]

  15. […] I first went raw, I thought Whole Foods, mecca of natural, organic foods and health and wellness products, was the only place that would […]

  16. Haha, i LOVE this!!