4.8
August 16, 2011

“Making a Girl.”

Relephant bonus:

~

What We Want.

Photoshop gives us what we think we want. It can’t give us what we truly want, which is to be loved, in reality.

Recently, a simple sexy image of a busty skating chick swept Reddit, a sharing site on the internet. I saw the image, and thought: “Boy I wish I could think of an angle to use that—something about tomboys, maybe, or skating and women…she’s so sexy it’d be sure to get a ton of hits.” I couldn’t think of a real angle that passed the BS test, so I let it go, despite the traffic it would have generated. Guar-an-teed.

Then, a followup post rose to the top of Reddit:

“Female, skating.” picture is a photoshop! (boobs, butt, waist enhanced and mirrored image) Found the unaltered image. (i.imgur.com)

And I had my angle. It’s sad. Take a moment to look at the differences: the cartoonish breasts and nipple, the puny waist.

It’s funny. We think we want sex, and conventionally pornographic Playboy style lusty bodies on our women.

And women, surely, lust after boys. Iterations of this scene have a million views on youtube:

But what we truly want? This: We want someone to grow old with.

Someone who can put up with us, but not let us get away with bullshit. We want, ironically, something that sounnnnds sooooo booooring: friendship.

Unless, of course, you’re an adolescent Redditor with a talent for photoshop.

 

 

An inspiring “tomboy”:

Self-friendship:

 

Some thoughtful reader dialogue (that we run into, understandably, just about every time this gets shared):

Michelle: Elephant Journal, this headline disappoints me. Even if she did look “hotter” in the photoshopped version, you’re still sexualizing the female body… Whether the Photoshop successfully makes her look more attractive does not matter. Please stop perpetuating the very mentality this article talks against

Jennifer: Men can’t seem to help it with the unsolicited comments on a woman’s looks/body/physical being…. I HAD hoped that the enlightened ones could, though!

Michelle: Jennifer it’s simply ingrained in how we process information (I.e., it’s internalized). It’s sad, but photoshop NOT making you look better is still viewed as an accomplishment. Beauty is still viewed as an accomplishment.

Michelle: Jennifer maybe we can eventually change that, and it starts with media and news outlets like Elephant Journal!

Elephant Journal Michelle this blog is literally a commentary on how culture sexualizes women—through photoshop, etc. Did you read it? We’re on the same page.

Elephant Journal Jennifer as said with Michelle this blog is literally a commentary on how culture sexualizes women—through photoshop, etc. Did you read it? We’re on the same page.

Jennifer: Elephant Journal I did read it and I thought that the caption did not match the content, in all honestly. <3

Tracy: “Recently, a simple sexy image of a busty skating chick swept Reddit, a sharing site on the internet. I saw the image, and thought: “Boy I wish I could think of an angle to use that—something about tomboys, maybe, or skating and women…she’s so sexy it’d be sure to get a ton of hits.” I couldn’t think of a real angle that passed the BS test, so I let it go, despite the traffic it would have generated. Guar-an-teed.”

Oh, yeah. It’s all about how -culture- sexualizes women through photoshop. It’s not at all about how you wanted to use this woman to get traffic to your blog, actively tried to think of a way to write a post -around- that, and eventually found your angle.

Michelle: Elephant Journal you may seem (and clearly adamantly think) like you’re on the same page but that headline implies differently- I’m solely referring to the headline

Jennifer: Elephant Journal If you had said “badass” or “awesome” or “amazing” instead of HOT, I would agree that we are on the same page.

Michelle: Jennifer ^^^^^ precisely

Elephant Journal: Jennifer the point of being transparent is if you can “use” an image of a kitty or a sexualized woman–you know, half the internet–to awaken and teach, instead of for more superficial BS, then we can do our job. The whole point is to use the language—”hot”—of those outside the choir. We’re not here to preach to you—you already get it.

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Ross Nov 17, 2015 2:28pm

It's all Barbie's fault. She gave us that figure; 44DD breasts and a 22" waist. No wonder so many women have problems thinking their bodies aren't OK……personally, I like real women….and it's all about what's on the inside……

Brett Dec 8, 2014 7:59pm

I was happy to see a woman skating. That’s what is attractive to me. That’s real.

Jeff May 20, 2013 12:03pm

I don't know about this. Demonizing sexual beauty is silly, even if it's photoshopped. I think it's possible to have both a bombshell and a best friend, all in one. I've proven it can be found at least once. And, if you prefer the natural version, that's just fine. No need to tell people with different preferences than you that they're sick.

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Waylon Lewis

Waylon Lewis, founder of Elephant Journal & host of Walk the Talk Show with Waylon Lewis, is a 1st generation American Buddhist “Dharma Brat.” Voted #1 in U.S. on twitter for #green two years running, Changemaker & Eco Ambassador by Treehugger, Green Hero by Discovery’s Planet Green, Best (!) Shameless Self-Promoter at Westword’s Web Awards, Prominent Buddhist by Shambhala Sun, & 100 Most Influential People in Health & Fitness 2011 by “Greatist”, Waylon is a mediocre climber, lazy yogi, 365-day bicycle commuter & best friend to Redford (his rescue hound). His aim: to bring the good news re: “the mindful life” beyond the choir & to all those who didn’t know they gave a care. elephantjournal.com | His first book, Things I would like to do with You, touches on modern relationships from a Buddhist point of view. His dream of 9 years, the Elephant “Ecosystem” will find a way to pay 1,000s of writers a month, helping reverse the tide of low-quality, unpaid writing & reading for free online.