10 Times not to Text.

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“LMK if Dad Makes it, K? THX!”

Texting is great for lots of things.

I actually prefer texting to a phone call, most times.

It’s a quick, convenient way to stay in touch.

Some people, though, seem to have forgotten when texting is appropriate, and when it isn’t—ever.

The idiots’ guide to when not to text:

1. Don’t text during your wedding.

2. Don’t text during a funeral.

3. Don’t text while walking.

4. Don’t text during sex.

5. Don’t text during yoga class (unless you work for Facebook).

6. Don’t text during meals.

Now, some people would argue with that one, but to me, be where you are. Talk with the people you’re with. Unless it’s a quick text to someone on their way to meet you: Put the phone down.

7. Don’t text while driving. Ever. Ever. Please. Never.

8. Don’t text while walking. It bears repeating. You look like a jackass. You are going to trip and break your stupid smartphone.

9. Don’t text in the bathtub or on the toilet. I would hope this goes without saying (but I’m guessing it doesn’t).

and last but not least:

10. Don’t text while you are doing something else.

Just do one thing. Send a text and pay attention to that. Talk to the people who are with you and just do that.

Multitasking makes us stupid.

We all try to do it and end up doing everything mindlessly and without focus.

So if you are eating a peach, close your laptop and let that delicious peach juice drip all over your face and make a wonderful mess without worrying about your keyboard. If you are in the bathtub, just be there and let it be like liquid meditation. If you are making love, you better not be anywhere near that damn iPhone, please, for the love of Cary Grant and all that is sacred—just be present.

And if someone dies, make an actual phone call. Don’t be that guy.

 

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Kate Bartolotta

Kate Bartolotta is a wellness cheerleader, yogini storyteller, and self-care maven.
She also writes for Huffington Post, Yoga International, Mantra Yoga+ Health, a beauty full mind, The Good Men Project, The Green Divas, The Body Project, Project Eve, Thought Catalog and Soulseeds.
Kate’s books are now available on Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble.com.

She is passionate about helping people fall in love with their lives.

You can connect with Kate on Facebook and Instagram.

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anonymous Dec 27, 2014 6:07am

This article is simply stating people should not lose manners, common courtesy and sense to text messaging. I agree 110% with kate and I think the list should even be longer. Texting should be a convenient tool, not a lifestyle. People lose social skills when texting becomes the main form of communication. For those who are offended by this list, I think texting made you a little sensitive (Another con about texting). How on earth does this list make kate “passive aggressive”? She’s entitled to her opinion. She’s reminding humanity not to lose themselves, their respect and decency when it comes to texting and it’s appropriate time. And yes, It’s very rude to text at a funeral. I don’t care what generation we are in. Manners, respect and being thoughtful never goes out of style. Wake up world, we are still human, not phones. Not long ago, I read an article how “smartphones” has brought on a generation of idiots. I’m all for advancement and technology and it’s convenience but I’m turned off when apps, phones, and texting replaces or interferes with the roll humanity should play in the present. Great article Kate! Thanks for the reminder.

anonymous Sep 23, 2014 3:48pm

Multitasking makes us stupid?

anonymous Apr 29, 2014 4:20pm

…except…Camille….to "start actually being present with them and to ourselves" (interesting phrase) we would have to not be, um, texting? Right? Less texting, more talking is the message here. Pretty simple. Pretty obvious. Stop whining about your right to text whenever you want and start thinking about what the message is. It's the truth. Over-texting is simply an addiction which has become rampant and it does effect everyone. Get a grip.

anonymous Apr 3, 2014 1:11am

How about if we all simply decided for ourselves about the appropriateness of our texting unless its going to hurt someone else?… Its against the law to text while driving, but I think that's the only one on this list that poses a safety risk to others. If my daughter is texting while I'm having a conversation with her and she's not paying attention, I ask her to stop for a moment. Why take it personally? If I were getting married and the guy I was marrying pulled out his phone and started texting, I'd be insulted, then I'd probably walk out and be grateful that it happened before the ceremony was over so that five years into it I had to deal with the fact that the marriage wasn't working. If I drop my phone in the toilet while texting, thats my problem. If I trip and fall on my face while walking and texting, I'll have some road rash on my face, but I think that too is my problem. What if we stopped trying to decide what's appropriate and what isn't? Maybe we'd stop judging other people's behavior and start actually being present with them and to ourselves.

    anonymous Apr 17, 2015 7:31pm

    Texting while walking can harm others. In our case it was the person who was texting while walking, didn't look up or around and ran into our daughter in downtown Chicago. We were at a corner waiting for a light to change. Luckily she's quick and so is my husband because the ill mannered person that ran into her shoved her onto Michigan Ave and into oncoming traffic. Not a word of apology or even acknowledgment either. Instead they shot my daughter dirty looks and glared at my disabled veteran husband and his service dog while muttering under their breath "I don't see no limbs missing!" That's something to think about as well. Deterioration of manners and awareness in one area might spill over into others.

anonymous Apr 2, 2014 8:57pm

Planting dandelions? They are a weed, fast spreading pest, unless you eat them at the same rate, it’s bad for the flora. Peace now

anonymous Mar 17, 2014 6:24pm

But eating that peach and letting it run down your face while you’re in the bath tub is OK in my book.

I do agree with your viewpoint on texting.it really has become rampant and far too accepted as a form of communication when a phone call or meeting someone face to face is far more important. I occasionally rent out a spare bedroom or two in my home and advertise this on Craigslist. In the ad I specifically asked people to call me to set up an appointment to meet and greet each other to see if we are compatible. I automatically reject all text messages asking about the room.

Keep up the good manners! 🙂

anonymous Feb 23, 2014 1:04pm

Don't text when what you have to say requires courage and willingness to deal face-to-face with the other person's reaction. In other words, don't text when you are BREAKING UP with someone.

anonymous Jan 24, 2014 2:29pm

well, full disclosure-I don't have a smart phone, don't even text on my old fashioned flip open cell phone-but even if I were to text, I would try to text as little as possible, and definitely mindfully and not while I was doing anything else.
In 20 years or so, I fully expect many people to have pain and stiffness both in their thumbs and in their necks-I am not kidding about this….God didn't mean for us to always be looking down at something, or using our thumbs that way.

anonymous Jan 24, 2014 8:59am

I am a 29 year old university student and it boggles my mind how much many of my peers text in class. I see so many of these students glued to their smartphone. I have no qualms turning off my phone while I am at school. But from what I’ve seen you’re right, Kate, it makes people stupid and you know what else it does? It makes people passive learners. I see a lot of my peers have little to no interest in participating in class so it seems that these days unless your information comes on a smartphone it isn’t interesting. I don’t know, maybe I’m just old fashioned.

anonymous Dec 1, 2013 12:57am

Text: "I'll pick you up asap" Me: Who is this? text: Mom Me: wrong number. Me: But I was impressed my mother learned to text and drive since I saw her yesterday. Big ha ha ha for us both. My new mom is now my friend (not really but sounds good).

anonymous Nov 3, 2013 10:44pm

Great rules for society. But needs a follow up article "What not to text". Eg. break up texts, stupid drunk texts. I found out in a one-sentence message from FB that my best friend had taken his life. People have become seriously deluded as to what appropriate communication is these days. With the kind of power that smart phones bring to change our lives there needs to be guidelines for how we use them (i.e. guidelines for being a socially acceptable and considerate human being!).

anonymous Nov 3, 2013 10:02am

Don't break up with someone by text. Big rule.

anonymous Nov 2, 2013 11:39am

Love this! X

anonymous Sep 18, 2013 2:18am

Also… never text when you have been drinking ! : ) Great post x

anonymous Sep 17, 2013 9:49pm

I think that people who find others rude for texting should say something to them. Posting a list is a little like being passive aggressive – don’t say stuff to their face but them complain about it after.

I text during many of your listed taboo times. I don’t find it rude if others do. Different values. Perhaps different generations. But I do speak up when someone is doing something that I find rude. I like to let them know they may wish to be more discrete.

anonymous Sep 17, 2013 8:14pm

Why can’t I text while in the bathroom? What’s it to you? Do I really need to be fully “in” that moment? I can’t multitask that one? Please.

    anonymous Sep 23, 2013 9:48pm

    That's what I was thinking. haha

    anonymous Mar 17, 2014 9:59am

    There was a study about the amount of fecal matter on cell phones, and it was utterly horrifying. You really can't be away from your phone while sitting on the can? Remind the rest of us never, ever, ever to borrow your phone.

anonymous Sep 17, 2013 7:27pm

No, "don't text while driving" deserves two entries, not "don't text while walking". Texting while driving kills. Texting while walking is more of a "no, please never ever".

anonymous Mar 14, 2013 9:04pm

Don't text to dump someone.

    anonymous Dec 2, 2013 6:08am

    Completely agree. Have some guts.

anonymous Feb 13, 2013 10:12pm

[…] are so wrapped up in emails and texts; it’s a beautiful change of pace. When we write it down on paper, with ink, we take our time a […]

anonymous Jul 30, 2012 3:44pm

also: don't text during chemotherapy unless you are looking for a ride home (and you should have arranged it earlier, dumbass!)

    anonymous Sep 17, 2013 8:28pm

    What? Why would anyone care if you text during chemo?

    anonymous Dec 8, 2013 3:36pm

    Why wouldn't you text during chemo? You should have any distraction you can! Play video games, read a book, text, whatever works for you!

    anonymous Jan 24, 2014 2:29am

    Why nit txt during chemo? Ive spent many an hout doing just that. Im all for living in the moment, but some moments I can kive without.

anonymous Jul 30, 2012 8:37am

Often we text because we don't really want to have a conversation which would possibly be quite long winded and we can't really or don't really want to invest in the emotional pull that involves!

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 30, 2012 2:49pm

    True! Also, I'm bad at wrapping up phone calls and end up rambling towards the end.

anonymous Jul 27, 2012 10:49pm

I promise I will respect your wishes at your funeral Kate! If ever I manage to live longer than you, I too text while walking & could easily drop in a hole lol

🙂

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 30, 2012 2:48pm

    Deal! Watch out for those holes!

anonymous Jul 27, 2012 6:25pm

Love it:))

anonymous Jul 27, 2012 4:02pm

No kidding. I found out my friend died on instagram. Luckily you can book flights for funerals with electronics as well. Ugh.

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 27, 2012 5:14pm

    Oh my god, how awful! So sorry!

anonymous Jul 27, 2012 2:47pm

Awesome post. And great to be reminded to do just one thing at a time. I'm unsuccessfully recovering from bad multitasking but never text in the car unless parked somewhere. Guilty of texting and walking. *blush*

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 27, 2012 5:15pm

    Thanks Lynn! No texting & walking…don't want you falling in a hole!

      anonymous Nov 3, 2013 5:36am

      LOL That's why I can't text and walk, I walked into a wall!!! LOL Luckily no one saw (that I know of) 😉 Canceled THAT bad habit quick~!

anonymous Jul 27, 2012 9:45am

i agree times are changing but too much of a good thing, in this example texting, can become a distraction from being present in the other important moments of our lives, no matter how old you are 🙂

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 27, 2012 5:15pm

    I agree. Present is important.

anonymous Jul 27, 2012 9:14am

I find someone's rules on when I can text or not quite unsettling. its texting, which in my opinion is quieter than making a phone call, lets say at a funeral. I just attended a good friend's father's funeral where I received a text & yes I read it & I returned a reply. I felt it more appropriate than making a call to the person, who was by the way coming to the parlor & checking the directions. So, who am I or you to decided when texts are appropriate or not? I find most people who have rules for inappropriate times of texting are those my age and its embarrassing! get with the new way of living! its liberating!

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 27, 2012 10:49am

    Hi Lori, you are welcome to text when you like. These are my thoughts on times when I find it inappropriate to text, but to each her own.

    That said, I fully plan to haunt anyone who is texting during my funeral.

    Yours,
    Kate

    anonymous Jan 25, 2014 5:35pm

    I agree with you 100%. The people who oppose are entitled to their ignorant opinions. Pay attention people. Especially ms. Pony tail in the big SUV who’s on the damn cell and not paying attention to the road.

    anonymous Feb 23, 2014 11:59am

    Liberating, or just addictive to pointless constant communication? The person who texted you at the funeral knew you were at the funeral. They could have got directions at any number of other sources, or ahead of time. It was unecessary and made you appear rude at a funeral. Think before you text, is this really necessary? might the other party have something better to do? People text on their way to see people. That is ridiculous, as you are going to see them in a few minutes. I'm leaving, I'm coming, I'm almost there, I'm outside…. Jesus! Who cares just get here and we will, you know, talk and look at each other, OK?

    anonymous Feb 23, 2014 8:00pm

    Liberation and freedom does't mean a pass card to be a jackass. It's just common sense and r-e-s-p-e-c-t. Thanks Kate, you are great.

    anonymous Feb 24, 2014 8:12am

    If you're gonna text at a funeral, at least have the common decency to excuse yourself, step away from the casket and go out to the hallway or foyer. You can be 'liberated' and still show the proper respect such an occasion merits.

anonymous Jul 26, 2012 11:50pm

You forgot: Don’t text while at the MOVIES!

    Kate Bartolotta Jul 27, 2012 6:22am

    Yes!

    anonymous Dec 17, 2013 2:14am

    Wehrenberg theaters have a zero tolerance “no mobile devices during the coming attractions and feature presentation” policy. Once those lights go down, that phone better be silenced and stashed, until the credits roll (you can step into the hallway)… otherwise, you are asked to leave without a refund.

Marisa Vogel Apr 25, 2018 8:50pm

Why would it be ok to text during yoga if you work for Facebook? A phone in the yoga room is bullshit, period. You are wasting your time and disrespecting that of those around you.

Scott M Coleman May 11, 2016 4:40pm

This guide is silly, I always text while pooping and bathing!!! What else u going to do! O an during dinner too when necessary, I like.to text the people I'm eating with and ask them dumb question lol.