During the past few years I have been hustling.
I am 23 years old and have done things other people may consider successful, like starting a business.
…I never feel like what I’m doing is enough.
When I’m broke and feel like I don’t know a thing about business, I’m simply not working hard enough.
When I’m booked with clients and have a rhythm of working that feels good, I’m not doing enough either. I could be doing more.
I’m done with that.
Because I’m starting to see that it’s never going to be enough.
I don’t feel like I’m doing enough whether I tick a dozen important things off my to-do list or none at all, whether I’m thriving or struggling.
I’m realizing that doing enough is actually a feeling.
One that I have experienced before. Usually when I cut out the noise and slowly go through my day focused on doing only a few things, allowing myself to stop working to do something, I enjoy in the afternoon.
On those days I feel grounded, at ease, content. I’m not worried about doing or being enough.
So, I am promising myself that from now on I will be doing things in my own rhythm.
Because, deep down, I can trust myself to know what my next steps are and set the right pace for myself. I know what would feel good to devote myself to. I know that rushing forward and reminding myself of all the things I could be doing just isn’t helpful.
It makes me feel tired.
So, this is it.
I’m done hustling.
I’m done pushing and forcing.
I’m done beating myself up and masking it as “you can do better” rah, rah.
I’m done feeling like what I do is not enough.
Author: Iris Barzen
Volunteer Editor: Kim Haas/ Editor: Ashleigh Hitchcock
Photo: Milena Trickovic/ Pixoto