I quit coffee because I found myself drinking that first cup of coffee even on days when it didn’t taste very good.
I quit because I like the idea of actually waking up when I open my eyes (not after my first cup of coffee).
I quit because I would get grumpy and anxious if we were traveling and coffee wasn’t readily available first thing in the morning. I didn’t want to be coffee’s bitch.
Over the years, doctors have asked me about my coffee consumption—and told me that coffee creates lumpy breasts. It finally hit me: that can’t be good.
I quit because I noticed that my fingertips smelled smoky, like I’d been puffing cigarettes, after drinking a lot of coffee.
It was clear to me that my body was ready to make the change, so I decided to follow my instincts.
It’s about becoming more mindful about my habits in my life—I’m now asking myself what I really want: compulsion or freedom?
What it was like:
Even though I tapered off by drinking a little less coffee every day, I had a week-long migraine.
It was hell.
And weeks more of vertigo and garden-variety headaches.
It was so bad I wondered if my brain tumor had returned.
So I tested it by sipping some black tea…and the symptoms disappeared.
For about three months, I felt “off.”
And then, suddenly I felt good again—then, better than ever.
What I did to get through:
The first few days of withdrawal, I stayed in bed a lot, the room darkened.
I listened to guided meditations.
I drank a lot of water and took long showers.
I asked my husband to rub my head and back, which he very kindly did.
I soothed myself with thoughts like this: nothing has gone wrong, it’s good that I’m detoxing, I am doing something kind for myself.
Here’s what’s happening now:
I feel calmer and more patient, less reactive.
I’m saving money.
I’ve discovered I can poop without coffee. In fact, my whole digestive system is happier and more normalized.
My breasts are less sore.
I’m sleeping better.
Caffeine actually works now. A few times I was at music events where I wanted to stay up and dance late, so I drank a coffee, and it gave me a boost that caffeine hasn’t in a long time.
I discovered I love a cup of peppermint tea in the morning. And a little green tea, now and then.
If I want the taste of coffee, a cup of decaf is a lovely treat.
I’m noticing the space between the desire and the acting upon the desire. It’s a rich space. When I allow myself to sit there, it’s like inhabiting the space between waves, between breaths.
Author: Kate Evans
Editor: Renee Picard
Image: Gian Cescon/Unsplash