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February 10, 2016

We are Born with Naked Hearts: Thriving in Vulnerability.

Anjali Romaniuk

“I want to talk about something. That word, that everyone says away from. The big V-word.”

I spoke to my whole yoga class about the power of vulnerability last night. How in the dictionary it is defined as “being open to injury or pain. To be easily hurt or harmed.”

I can completely understand why we are terrified of this word. Most of us have become vulnerable in our life but usually not by choice. Our walls come down in a relationship, at a job, and we get burned; sometimes badly. Our whole perception of vulnerability is that it causes pain, and why would we want to do something that intentionally causes us pain?

What we don’t look at is the power of vulnerability.

The shedding of layers, of that hard shell that protects all of our feelings, our ego, and we are afraid of being authentic, we are afraid to get naked.

We forget to look at the light that can come from choosing to be completely open.

There are many times where I second guess publishing my writings for all my friends and the world to read. I pour my heart out in my words and it is not an easy task to welcome others into our world. It takes a lot of self love to be vulnerable, which is a b*tch of a task on its own.

There were times where I would be told, “No, don’t post that. Don’t make yourself look weak. Don’t expose your feelings, people don’t need to see that.”

Don’t feel. Don’t expose. Don’t open. Don’t be vulnerable.

When I wrote my first article this year, my hands were shaking with fear, fear that people would reject my words, fear that I would get in trouble. But still, I posted my heart to the world—as if I had ripped it out of my chest and stapled it to a bulletin board, for everyone to see.

I was so naked. Completely stripped. Totally vulnerable, but this time by choice.

I got a massive number of emails and messages saying “Thank you for sharing your story. I too have felt that pain, I too have felt that lost, I too have fell down that f*cking rabbit hole and I’m so happy to know that I am not alone.”

Every single part of my mind, body, and soul told me yes, yes, yes! This is what can come from a vulnerable state. We can touch people with our words, with our actions, as long as they are authentic.

It is so easy to stay in a safe zone. To talk ourselves out of a situation that seems so uncomfortable to us. It’s so easy to say “No, because I night get hurt.” We say no to jobs, to friends, to love. Instead of “Yes, because I might find magic here.”

We connect when we are completely open.

We are able to create spaces where we are safe.

We truly thrive when we can find this space of vulnerability.

There is always a chance of pain in life. There is always a change for an amazing, eye opening, heart warming experience, and if we settle for no, if we stay closed our whole life, how will we ever discover that?

We we born with open hearts. Naked hearts.​

 

Author: Anjali Romaniuk

Editor: Catherine Monkman

Photo: author’s own

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