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May 6, 2016

An Open Letter to Every Lover who Broke My Heart.

back turned goodbye

To the ones who lied to me,

Thank you for glorifying your emotions, your intentions and lifting me up with hope, however false it was at the time.

You fed me sugary lies, because you knew honesty would turn me sour. You knew that I would leave you if I knew how you really felt.

You said what you had to to keep me around.

You knew you didn’t love me. You knew it wasn’t going to last, but you still wanted me in that very moment.

It’s okay. I forgive you.

~

To the ones who gave me only half of their heart,

Thank you for giving me the little bit of love that you could muster. Thank you for almost loving me.

You cared about me, but the thought of true love, terrified you. You wanted to dive right in, but last time you did, you drowned. I get it.

You wanted to trust your heart to me, more than anything, but you gave it to fear and ego instead.

It’s okay. I forgive you.

~

To the ones who thought I wasn’t good enough,

Thank you for trying me on for size. I bet you wanted me to fit the mold as much as I did.

You found me good enough for sex, for a weekend trip and even enough for a relationship. You enjoyed me enough to call, to take me out and to even fall in love with me. But I wasn’t your dream girl.

I understand. You stayed, you tried, you found someone better and you left.

It’s okay. I forgive you.

~

To the ones who didn’t want my whole heart,

Thank you for being open and telling me the cold, hard truth. Thank you for showing me how to love without expectations.

You wanted to laugh with me, sleep with me and spend a few precious moment with me. You didn’t want me to fall in love with you; I just did.

Thank you for telling me that you couldn’t give me more than the present moment. A text here and there, a date, an unforgettable night.

It’s okay. I forgive you.

~

To all these lovers of my past, I say thank you. I still love you.

You did nothing wrong. It’s not your fault.

Every one of you let me go so I could be in the arms of my one true love. I cried in emotional and physical pain over each of you, oblivious that I would sit here now feeling a peaceful satisfaction so new, pure and brilliant.

Today, I’m partnered with a person who can share openly and honestly, who can wholly and unabashedly love me, who finds me to be perfect in every way possible and who wants nothing more than to hold my entire heart.

I hope you have found this kind of love too!

My lover now isn’t any better or more wonderful than any of you from my past. My current mate isn’t any more kind, or loving or perfect. It’s just that this person is the one I was meant to love and all of you wonderful people along the way, just made me appreciate what I have now, so much more. So, thank you.

Thank you for the lies, so I could appreciate openness. Thank you for the fear, so I could appreciate vulnerability. Thank you for the disappointment, so I could appreciate fulfillment.

Thank you for the lackluster love, so I could appreciate rapture.

All my best,

 

~ Your Ex

 

 

 

Author: Lealyn Poponi

Editor: Renée Picard

Image: Macadam13/Pixabay 

 

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