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March 20, 2019

Love is Created with People by Overcoming Our Fears, Wounds, and Internal Drama

We are more than our body and mind. Our human perception is often very limited. We see reality from our own filters and distortions. In our human experience we are living every moment based on the past conditions we have had and survived. Until we are able to make peace with ourselves, we continue to replay old tapes, old conditioning, childhood trauma, and past life issues. We often recreate the same reality and same relationships, until we learn the lessons and evolve into a higher way of thinking and being.

Life and people have a funny way of teaching us, and helping us grow, if we allow them.

I remember when my world fell apart and almost every close relationship I had left my life. Internally, I was going through my own changes, and wanting to become a better and more loving human being. I chose to improve my lifestyle, stopped hanging out at bars, and quit spending my time doing stupid and useless things. Instead, I got more into yoga, followed those hobbies I was passionate about, and took time to care for me, and my health. As I changed, my world changed, and all the people in it. 

It’s said that the Universe moves people and things out of our life if and when we’re truly ready to let go and move on. I believe chaos and storms happen in our lives to help us grow stronger, wiser, and more mature. However, if we react and get caught in our mind, we can sabotage ourselves make some wrong choices, and be held in resistance.

Although, most of us are conditioned to think we have full control of our life and our destiny, I’ve learned that there is actually so much more than we know and more than we can see that causes things to happen. The Universe does conspire to help us become the person we are meant to be, however, it requires trials and obstacles, and also the willingness to detach and allow the wrong things to be removed, so the right ones can come in. We individually must be willing to grow and become more self aware within ourselves.

Growth is challenging, but it’s necessary for our soul. When we are unwilling to look at ourselves, face our patterns, and see the wicked ways we sabotage ourselves and others, our life often becomes more chaotic. Although, we all have unconscious habits and fears and ways we act out in this world, what we all need to be aware of is what is truly going on within ourself. Once we identify our own triggers, we can learn how to overcome the unconscious thoughts, insecurities, and pains, associated within our mind and body that cause us to react and respond in negative ways.

In our culture many of us live unconscious and fail to look at our flaws and weaknesses. We get trapped in our mind, point the fingers on others, tell people it’s their problem, and fail in resolving the issues that are within ourselves. Fear can be a driving force that often keeps us from maintaining a loving state and peaceful clear mind. 

People and relationships can trigger us, hurt us, and also help us transform out of our wounded or victimized states. Rather than shaming and blaming others and projecting our own beliefs, we can learn to communicate better and get out of our own worries and stories, and heal the underlying issues that are causing separation and disconnection. Until we heal the mental and emotional components of our problems, we continue to react in negative ways, get judgmental, and think other people are the problem.

We can fight, divorce, end relationships, fire someone, and cut cords with people and circumstances. However, if the unconscious thought and pattern is not identified and healed, we will do that all our life and isolate ourselves from others because we do not want to confront our deeper issues.

I know healing from trauma and admitting we have problems, is not easy in our culture. However, it’s necessary in order to connect better with others, have healthy relationships, and especially live with an open loving heart.

The wounded person will continue to cause conflict by reacting, ignoring people, and saying it’s other peoples fault. Often they will turn against people when they don’t get their way. People’s unconscious emotional drives will always win and cause people to act the way they do. 

Without having self awareness and developing emotional intelligence, we will continue to fail in seeing our shadows and helping ourselves mature beyond our childish and immature ways.

We can learn from each other by realizing our perception is ours alone. Learning how to consciously communicate and deal with our own issues can help us resolve drama. We abandon ourselves and often hurt others when we cause separation, get hostile, break relationships, and fail to mend the trauma that’s living within ourselves. 

I’ve noticed that when I place boundaries around myself and quit letting people walk all over me, they often fight to get their way and get upset. The majority of people hate confronting conflict, and love thinking they are right. This ego mindset will continue to keep us unconscious, stuck in our behaviors, and unwilling to develop more compassion and human kindness. 

Everything we attract and experience in life has a purpose. We are all playing off each other and trying to make the best of it. However, when we get too attached to having things and people be as we want them to be, we loose our own opportunity to evolve and become better humans. 

To peacefully mend anything, we can develop clear communication with others. Expressing both peoples conflicts, and taking time to talk can resolve whatever unhealed wounds there are within both people. Without the internal trigger being resolved, we live with the unconscious pattern and emotional response. 

What we really want is to create harmony with people and unify rather than divide. This requires improving the relationship we have with ourself and others.

Otherwise, we can break peoples hearts in the process of trying to get our way. We will react and say bad things, and we will allow our own issues to keep us in a fearful state. Those unconscious patterns and behaviors will continue to keep us out of a state of love, and in a state of ignorance. It’s always easier to ignore our issues and think it’s not us or our fault.

I’ve learned that people do come and go in life. It’s important we all be willing to take care of ourselves, be ourselves, and also be willing to resolve whatever wounds we carry. There is great liberation in connecting with other humans, speaking up about what’s bothering us, and confronting issues before they blow up. There is healing in mending our wounds and speaking with others too. Although mindfulness, meditation, yoga, and all sort of self help things help me, ultimately, we need to be able to live amongst each other in more positive and peaceful ways. 

Changing myself cannot change the people who continue to blame, shame, and tell me my perspective and thoughts are not valid. We need more respect with each other. People must also look at themselves, their behaviors, their beliefs, and what’s driving the confusion.

When we are willing to change ourselves, we are also able to let go of what’s toxic and those people who refuse to change. Soul growth is challenging, but necessary. Everyone is a great teacher here on Earth. We all have triggers and wounds. Rather than denying them, we can all begin to look at them, and help ourselves live in more peaceful loving ways.

In healing ourselves, connecting to our mind and body, and overcoming our own emotional rage, we can become more loving people, and see things more for what they are, rather than what we think or believe them to be.

We can all transform, adopt new mindsets, and see triggers as opportunities to work through fear, so that we all can embody more love, connection, and harmony. We can help each other in becoming more loving within ourselves and with others. Together, we can unify, improve relationships, and live with more love and connection.

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