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A post shared by Elephant Journal (@elephantjournal) on Jul 1, 2019 at 6:43pm PDT

I am not my past

I am not the fat around my middle

I am not my stories
I am not the scar under my eye
or the little pink veins in my legs

I am not what’s on the surface
nor am I what’s underneath

I am not my hurt, nor am I my triumph

I am not yours to keep
No, I do not belong to you

I am not weight lost and gained again all these steadfast years
I am not my raging tears
I am not my assault
I am not a label, or an age, or a bracket, or a category
I am not an ideal candidate
I am not my shame, nor am I my regrets
I am not my personality, nor the food I eat

I can’t be everywhere and then everything, too
I can’t always get what I want
and neither can you

I can’t be the half that makes you whole

I don’t need more stuff
I don’t need to be the center of attention, even though I like it
and I sure don’t need another drink
but,

I do need love
I need grace
I need you to see me, to study my face
I need you to see it all
and then I need you to watch me let it go
because I am not my endless battle
with neither a beginning, nor an end

I am all you see, and don’t see
a fire, with nothing to burn

I am what’s in my heart
what’s in the beating silence—
what’s in the lonely gaps between the big and small decisions
that make my dirty, good world turn.

~