The anger I felt turned to rage, and without giving it a second thought the phone I was holding went flying across the room.
What stories are you holding onto?
What baggage are you willing to let go of?
We all have our stories. We hold onto the past letting it take front stage in this present moment. We get caught up in the same old thoughts, and feelings of yesterday, last week, last month, last year. We spin our tales of what happened to us years ago, and let them define us.
Lately, I’ve been asking myself,
Who am I without my stories?
Do I even exist if I let them go?
What happens when I let go of this person that I’ve allowed myself to be defined as up to this point?
I’ve come to realize that most of what I believe about myself comes from my past, and other people’s beliefs about me.
I’ve allowed myself to be defined by the opinions of others, and that’s not always pretty, or empowering.
When we continually make decisions that are triggered by our wounds, past memories, and unconscious behaviours we keep ourselves stuck in a past that is really trying to evict us. We continue to participate in patterns that are not healthy.
I have found that every time I’ve felt triggered by something someone else has said, or not said, something they’ve done, or not done I was reacting in the same unhealthy, and unconscious ways that have propelled me all my life. I have been allowing myself to get completely wound up in my anger, because on some level I believed that what they were saying about me was true.
Instead of letting go of my reactions I was white-knuckling it, and holding onto my anger out of a sense of self righteousness. It was really fear, and misguided guilt leading me down the dark corridors of my past.
It’s time for all of us to take our power back. It’s time to drop the old stories, and reactions. Let go of the unhealthy patterns, and behaviors. Let us stop allowing ourselves to be defined by our wounds, and other people’s beliefs about us.
Let’s redefine who we are, by listening more to the whispers of our soul then the screams of our ego.
I believe we are all being called to grow. We are being called to step into the highest version of ourselves.
Please believe me when I say, if you resist, or ignore this call you will make your life more difficult, more painful.
The best thing you can do is learn to flow with it. Recognize, and acknowledge your triggers, and insecurities. Acknowledge the painful patterns, and behaviors that are holding you hostage to your past.
Have you had a lot of triggers showing up lately? That’s your spirit calling you forward. It’s asking you to confront your stories, and limiting beliefs. It’s giving you a nudge to make different choices, and better decisions. If you’ve been ignoring these nudges, as I was, they’ve likely become really loud.
Be honest with yourself, and do the work necessary to let go of your baggage, and outdated stories. If you need help find someone; a therapist or mentor who can help guide you. You are worth it, and it is really the most loving, selfless thing you can do for yourself, and others.
The best thing you can do is stay positive, and grateful. Yes, I know the whole positive attitude thing, you’ve heard it all before. That’s another post for another day, but truly fear and doubt will keep you stuck, and playing small. Aren’t you tired of going around in the same endless circles?
When something seemingly new pops up, and triggers us it’s never new. There is always a connection to a past story, and an opportunity to do the healing required to let it go.
Let go of your resentments, let go of your anger, let go of the unforgiveness you’re holding in your heart.
Instead, hold onto compassion, kindness, tolerance, and the love that wants to be expressed through you.
Let your soul lead you. Let love lead you. It knows the way better that you do.
Oh, and my phone? Thankfully not a scratch. Whew!!