4.4
September 17, 2020

How Threesomes & Swinging Saved my Marriage.

Whenever we feel that our sexual relationship’s flames are dying, my wife and I usually arrange for a threesome. 

We view it as a way to reignite passion—it enlivens and fortifies our marriage.

We make sure to discuss everything beforehand because arranging for a successful threesome requires effort. There is a need for more communication in threesomes and foursomes than would typically be needed in twosomes.

First, we always make sure we discuss and are clear about what we want in the sexual experience. Transparency and honesty are necessary for any marriage or relationship.

We also discuss various things with our prospective partners: how long will it take, whether to have sex or just foreplay, and whether kissing would be okay. We have always preferred to stick to a threesome or foursome because we find orgies (encounters of more than four partners) a bit chaotic.

The best place to get prospective partners is the internet, but not Craigslist (that’s another story I shall write about soon). Some websites are dedicated to connecting swingers, singles, and couples, and that is where you want to explore.

Here are some tips and things that have worked for us while exploring this sexual realm:

Strangers Not Friends

It is always better to avoid friends when looking for people to engage with. If things don’t go well, it would be much easier to cope with a stranger than with someone you are tied up with. Our first threesome happened in New York with a stranger, and that’s how we like it—with new people that we don’t know.

We also make sure we practice safe sex by being aware of our prospective partners’ medical history and ascertaining that things such as condoms, deodorants, and dental products are nearby. (Oral hygiene is another necessity for everyone.)

Cleanliness Is Essential

We always advise our prospective partners to make sure they have showered and are well-groomed before they come to the party. Appropriate perfumes, cologne, or body spray can make a big difference. Every person should make sure he/she has good breath and pleasing body odor so that he/she does not become a turn-off to potential partners.

We also ensure that everybody agrees on not pulling any tricks, such as removing the condom during the act. Keeping things safe is important. With safety taken care of, it becomes possible to enjoy the experience without having to worry.

How to Start

We always start the session by ensuring there is a light-hearted atmosphere. Playing a game, such as chess or bridge while sipping wine or beer, helps set up the mood and makes people more relaxed. This is gradually followed by caressing and undressing as everyone slowly plunges into action.

I always ensure to my wife that these swinging experiences will not be a replacement for our one-on-one intimacy. So we often set up rules to follow and are honest toward each other.

I make sure that whenever I am participating in one of these encounters, she is also around. I also make sure that I never do anything during threesome or foursome sex that I have never done before with her.

Being Swingers

We don’t believe it is possible to satisfy one another sexually over a long period of time, so swinging adds excitement to our marriage (and has saved it from ruin). Rather than have an illicit extramarital adventure behind your partner’s back, it is better that you both get involved in an otherwise legitimate affair.

This has always served my wife and me the double function of satisfying our inner passions and doing away with any guilt that would have otherwise resulted from having an illicit love affair.

We have developed greater trust toward each other besides learning new sexual techniques that have brought liveliness and satisfaction in what could have otherwise become dreary marital coitus.

One should try to do away with the guilty feeling that inhibits one from experimenting sexually.

We are all brought up with misconceptions since science has shown that sexual experimentation is not good. I’m here to tell you that not only is it okay, but it boosts our psychological and physiological health (when done in the right way).

There’s everything to be gained and nothing to be lost when a threesome, swinging excursion, or wife-swapping is carried out in the right way. On the other hand, when it is done incorrectly, it could lead to a world of toxic, inhibited sexual adventure and subsequent disenchantment with one’s marriage.

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