February 22, 2021

How to Become our True, Unapologetic Selves.

Yes…it’s all about moderation…

Balance is a notion I have always struggled with.

I tend to have an extremist approach in life but found it to be the most effective for a balanced, beautiful journey.

As a Libra, I always dream big, aim high, want everything, and get too carried away sometimes.

But also, as a Libra, I tend to try and find the balance to be able to practice what I love and be who I am without depriving myself of any of the things my heart desires.

The way I see it now is that I know what I want more of, and I acknowledge when I should say “no,” refuse, say “yes,” or accept (feelings, activities, hobbies, jobs, happy moments, and sad ones), or not want to do anything. All of this makes a perfect blend to teach us who we really are and orients us more and more toward our happiness and happy place—our so-called “home”—which, to me, is that beautiful feeling of safety, protection, and a raw sensation of being unapologetically our true selves.

What is moderation?

I see moderation as the way to learn to say “no;” the way to accept that, sometimes, we should not get too pushy to get what or who we want; the way to realize as we move forward with something how much we should give time and effort, how much to invest in it, how much of ourselves to put on the table, and how much it deserves getting involved in.

To begin with, feelings are made to be felt, to show us what our hearts and minds want, accept, and fear (or the opposite). Good, positive feelings push us forward—they fuel our passions, fire us to keep going and persevere, whilst negative ones teach us to stay away, refuse, and remove ourselves from certain situations and some relationships.

Relationships—whether romantic involvements, friendships, anything in between, or unconventional—flourish when both parties are giving and taking, listening and speaking, sacrificing and being sacrificed for, loving and sometimes hating, being selfish and being selfless all at once. All of this while slowly finding the optimal balance that works and leads to the growth of both parties, even if sometimes one side is unable to provide or too broken to be able to sacrifice and needs the other to become better and recover themselves.

Our jobs are a necessary way to be able to provide for ourselves, reach our goals, and get better, and if we are lucky enough and work for it, it might be something we love and enjoy doing. To be able to excel in a profession, we must somehow be self-fulfilled and accomplished. Our personal goals and growth should also be reached in parallel, as our character and uniqueness are the way to reach success in the workplace and climb up the ladder to reach our ultimate goal.

Even if we are the CEO of a company or if we stopped working to travel the world, we require moderation and finding a balance between personal activities, hobbies, self-care, and throwing ourselves into our professional lives—giving it our best to reach our own unique, personal definition of success.

To share a little about myself, I was too involved in medicine in my early university years; I almost lost my identity and what makes me me. Ten years later, I am giving myself more time, practicing my hobbies, and writing. It feels empowering to be more motivated in the hospital, read more, and ultimately and progressively become a better doctor (yes, even in the midst of a deadly pandemic).

I am still a work in progress, but I am finding my middle ground and loving it.

So yes, moderation is key; it starts with knowing what we want from life (which is an entire journey on its own) and then gradually reaching the perfect mix of emotions, activities, working hours, taking care of others, and practicing self-care.

It will not be easy, but be assured that it is worth investing in, as it guides us to our true selves and how to become who we aspire to be.

It sets us on the right path to reaching what we differently and individually define as our own version of happiness…our happy place, our safety net.



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