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June 26, 2021

17 Bits of Wisdom I’ve learned from 43 Trips around the Sun.

Do you ever wonder how different life would be if that one thing never happened?

There is a story behind all of us, there is a reason why we are the way we are.

1. What hurts us is often what heals us.

We repeat what we don’t repair. Be patient and trust the process. Learn to enjoy the space between where you are and where you want to be.

2. Self-care is giving the world the best of us, instead of what’s left of us.

It’s okay to temporarily shut down for spiritual maintenance.

3. Money will never solve our problems.

While it can buy us nice things, it will never solve our broken relationship or cure our unhappiness.

4. The biggest communication problem we have is we do not listen to understand, we listen to reply.

What others say and do is a projection of their own reality. Don’t take others’ judgments and criticism personally. Be curious. We can all learn from one another.

5. Learn to pace yourself.

Often, when we begin our journey to adulthood, we feel as though we have to have everything figured out at once or by a certain age. Don’t rush into things. Let life unfold. Take time to weigh your options.

6. We can’t please everyone.

It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected, and valued, but not at the expense of our integrity and happiness. We don’t need everyone to agree with us or even like us. Other people cannot give us the validation we seek. That has to come from the inside. Speak up and assert yourself when you need to. Stay true to your values.

7. Our physical and emotional health is our most valuable asset.

We tend to take our good health for granted because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it until we have to. Health is invaluable, appreciate it, nurture it, and protect it.
 
8. Perspective is a beautiful thing.

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 10, 20, or 30 years from now. It’s hard to see long-term when all we know it’s short-term but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go and move on.

9. We don’t always get what we want.

No matter how carefully we plan and how hard we work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way we want them to…and that’s okay.

10. It’s not all about us.

It’s normal to be aware of everything that’s going on in our own lives, but we need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around us and how much things affect other people in the world. It helps to keep things in perspective.

11. There’s no shame in not knowing.

No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make us perfect. We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainty, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go; that’s life.

12. Don’t be afraid to walk your own path.

Some people will judge us regardless. It’s easy to let peer pressure make us stray from our own path and follow others. But it is important to march to the beat of our own drum and avoid that pressure to conform to some popular social “norm.” You are your own special person, and you should follow your own path. Don’t let others dictate the way you live your life.

13. Don’t be someone with a hard edge that’s mean and unapproachable.

Seriously, who truly wants to be like that? Soften your edge. Open your heart. Be trusting enough to risk getting hurt. Be authentic. Be kind.

14. Love is more than a feeling—it is a choice we make every day.

We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to be respectful, to be supportive, and to be faithful. Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is ultimately up to us to choose how we want to act, think, and speak. Actions speak louder than words and words can hurt—choose wisely.

15. Don’t take anything for granted.

We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes our health, our family, our friends, our job, or thinking we will have it tomorrow. Nothing in our life is guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those we love. This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all. Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

16. Life is too short to wake up with regrets.

Love the ones who treat you right, forgive the ones who don’t. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it.

17. Always keep believing something wonderful is about to happen.

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