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It has been a few days since I’ve felt invaded, almost intoxicated, by a large amount of anxiety.
I could say the reason for this is the solar eclipse we just went through. And somewhere, it probably is.
The Universe and the stars are trying to push ourselves into releasing more of our shadows—of the things we chose to do out of misalignment. The planets are, in fact, at this time, acting as catalysts to shake our lives up.
However, I know it is not only this.
What’s happening is more. What’s happening is way deeper.
I’m currently finding myself in this situation for a reason I know so well, and I’ve walked through already: I chose once again to engage in a job that’s not fully aligned with myself.
We think we know ourselves, but sometimes we don’t. We repeat similar experiences as we did in the past as if we wanted to find out again, to prove ourselves right—to prove another time that a former lesson was accurate…was real.
We test ourselves through life. We want to make sure by checking in. We can be reckless soldiers at times; we test our limits.
And this time again, my body has spoken. Conventional jobs with massive amounts of pressure that don’t give enough space for ourselves, for life, for beauty, for healing, don’t work for me.
As I was serving this company and trying to perform there, I lost track of the basics: my daily movement practices such as walks in nature and breathing exercises, as well as my self-care rituals, such as writing, giving myself time to process emotions, and giving myself downtime.
In a nutshell, I have insidiously given up on what is key for me to feel good and balanced as a human being.
Now, there are two paths. I can either chew these facts over and over and let this take over my energy, or I can choose to move forward, see the truth of the situation by making peace with the fact that it was misaligned, and keep going, keep rebirthing, and find what I know works for me.
I will choose option two. It is the one that corresponds with self-preservation and even survival.
When we know what works for ourselves—when life has undoubtedly proved it many times—we must follow through in that direction.
Therefore, I will now choose the path of regeneration and feeling good, which is healing.
The practices I am going to use to ease my nervous system and come back to a state of emotional balance include:
>> Walks in nature
>> Listening to soothing music
>> Practising self-reiki
>> Spending time on my own and/or with people that feel good to my nervous system
>> Write, write, and read: articles, journals, poetry.
These are and will always remain my favourite healing practices.