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January 29, 2022


The trauma of a breakup has many reeling for weeks, months and even years. As a dating coach, I give my clients simple techniques that will also help you move on with your life, so you can attract the love you deserve.

Stop talking about your ex. Every time you tell the story, you are growing your heartache. Every time you resist telling someone, you are diminishing the control this breakup has on you. Eventually you will feel stronger because you aren’t constantly reminding yourself of the past pain.

If you have recently had a breakup and you know people are going to ask, take the time to have a script for the situation. My favorite is something simple like this, “It just didn’t work out. We are both in a better place, so how are you?” Immediately turn the conversation onto the other person. People love to talk about themselves, so this is an easy way to bypass telling an agonizing story that just reopens the wound. Keep the phrases simple or you will be rambling. Simple statements help you remain graceful and composed.

If someone is persisting to hear details, gracefully excuse yourself and walk away. Tell them you need the bathroom, and as quickly as possible, remove yourself from an awkward situation.

If you catch yourself ruminating and trying to figure out why you broke up, switch it off immediately by saying the following affirmations that build your confidence and help you get past a difficult time:

  • I deserve true love. I will meet someone who loves and adores me. I have a lot to look forward to!
  • I deserve to meet someone who is caring, kind, sweet, and deeply devoted to me. I am so excited for true love!
  • I choose someone worthy of me. I patiently wait to meet the right person who is a true companion, devoted, committed, loving, responsible and very excited to be in a relationship with me.

Believe that true love is as natural as breathing. Keep telling yourself: Of course I am going to meet my soulmate! Of course we are going to have a great life together! It will happen as soon as you believe!

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Georgette Van Vliet  |  Contribution: 2,860