Your mind is the sexiest thing about you.
I circled the parking lot three times before I snagged prime parking at the front door of the restaurant.
I was meeting my blind date. We chatted on the phone only once to pick a meeting place. I knew nothing about him. Dinner seemed appropriate.
A college friend thought we’d be perfect together. She met him at the gym and probably went off on the fact that I was super into working out. I didn’t know her well, I only met her through other friends from my world religion class, but she swore he was perfect for me.
My heels clicked on the hardwood floor as I made my way to the Maître D’.
My table was ready, so she led the way and I hurried to follow suit. I smiled nervously as we walked through the restaurant. She took me to a quiet table in the back and placed two menus on the table.
She said my other party hadn’t arrived yet, which I had already guessed by the empty table. She sent the waiter over to take my drink order. I read the menu to keep myself busy until my date arrived.
My stomach dropped when I heard someone clear their throat. I glanced up, and there he was.
There were no fireworks. I wasn’t instantly attracted to him. I didn’t find him sexy at all. He was plain and somewhat boring-looking. But he looked nice enough. I thought, okay, I’ll eat my dinner and roll. I should be home in time to watch the next episode of Friends. I relaxed in my chair a bit as he took his seat.
Then he spoke. And everything changed inside of me.
This man was smart. We discussed the current state of affairs. We talked about the stock market. We talked about the moon and stars. We poured into the literary world. It was refreshing to talk to someone knowledgeable about the world around us. He wasn’t opinionated nor cocky. He was open to listening to what I had to say, even if he disagreed.
If you can engage me in this, I will be forever yours.
I really do hate small talk. I want to discuss stuff, think about stuff, create new thoughts and ideas, and explore things that nobody else wants to explore. I want to talk about magic, books, the moon, the ocean, or why our planet is in danger.
His mind was the sexiest thing about him. And I was hooked.
I am a sapiosexual. I find intelligence super sexy in a person.
The definition of sapiosexual may vary, but one thing is agreeable: sapiosexual people are turned on by what they think is the most alluring feature in a person—the mind.
The smarter you are, the sexier you become.
If you find intelligence the most attractive feature in a person, and if you think the brain is the sexiest part of the body, you’re probably a sapiosexual as well.
It’s what is on the inside that really matters, right?
But why is the mind super sexy?
Smart people learn about the world and the people in it. There is a big world out there. Where we were born and how we grew up is just a tiny part of what makes it up. There is so much yet to discover.
Smart people know the extent of their ignorance and don’t need to be right. It’s their confidence in what they know and what they don’t know that leaves room for what they are about to learn.
Smart people have deep conversations. They talk about things that matter, and sometimes things that don’t matter. But they put heart and soul into every conversation. Communication matters. Communication opens the door for the unanswered questions. When he/she communicates deeply, they are solving problems. They are creating solutions.
Smart people leave room for mistakes. Mistakes happen when someone puts themselves out there to learn.
Smart people acknowledge that there are no stupid people. They don’t think they are better than anyone else. Everyone is equal in their eyes.
You don’t need to attend an ivy league school or graduate at the top of your class. Intelligence is depth and emotion.
If you’re one of the smart ones, chances are you are dating a sapiosexual.
Here are some ways to get super sexy and have fun with your sapiosexual date:
A sapiosexual’s idea of foreplay is to hear about your book collection, partake in witty banter, and comparative thinking. Or instead of foreplay, deeply discuss your sexual desires. Be vivid. The mind can really get creative and sensual.
Show genuine enthusiasm or curiosity in their unique interests. If she/he loves books, make literature a focus point of topics. If world religion is their thing, brush up on religion from around the world.
Pay attention to their interests. Not all sapiosexuals are alike. Get to know who they are and what they like.
Discover culture together. Couples who explore the world together become smarter together.
Talk nerdy to them. This is a huge turn-on for any sapiosexual. The more nerdy you talk, the hotter he/she will be for you.
Have conversations together. It stimulates the mind.
Start a book club or go on library dates. These are free, cheap, and fun date ideas. What better way to show off your supersonic smartness to your sapiosexual lover?
Watch a documentary and cuddle. Any documentary will do.
Share your passions with them. There is no better way to show off who you are than to open yourself to the things that truly light you on fire.
Learn a new skill together. Something neither one of you have ever done before.
Write a short story together. This one might be my favorite. Everyone has a writer inside them. I can only imagine what beauty would come from writing with a lover.
Read to them. This is the most romantic one of them all.
To all the smart people, show the world your nerdy side. There is a sapiosexual waiting to meet you.
Show off your super sexy mind. Your sapiosexual will thank you.