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August 3, 2023

The Reality Vs the Posts

Life has never been at all what I’ve planned it to be. It has also never been easy. I’ve traveled from Switzerland to live in Thailand in the last year. Due to covid we had to look for new work and we no longer had the opportunities we once had in beautiful Switzerland. Then from Thailand to America to hold my first yoga retreat, scary and amazing at the same time…. Then from Thailand to Australia to go home for the first time in 3 years. After that, I went back to America for work and then back to Thailand again with two stops in Bali for work and family (a place my heart wants to love but due to a large life traumatic event there. Every time it challenges me to the core). They say time heals all wounds. I think this is not true. Time creates space to process it and in time hope we can learn to distance ourselves and see the here and now instead of the pain of the past. I’ve also had a major neck injury that nearly made me want to quit teaching and lose most of my skills for a bit as an arm balancer and personal trainer in the upper body. Movement is my first passion & joy and Im not sure who I’d be without it. This year I feel has been hard for many of us with the worlds economy and life changing after covid and sadly not only did we have to move country for work but I had to cancel my second retreat and that’s been a hard hit.
But on the other hand my daughter moved from a German speaking country and school to an English life and school with Thai. She has done it with more awesomeness than I ever could have had.
To be honest, behind all the pretty posts it’s been a lot. It looks cool when you read it. But I’ll tell you it’s been a tough year in so many ways but always a beautiful one too.
I can’t believe it’s the 1st of August 2023 already. I remember in 1997 I was in high school wondering if I would live more than in Tasmania or travel the world. However I was super grateful to be in the same school as my big brother. He always made me feel safe and inspired me. I remember in my mid twenties traveling and working on a cruise ship thinking wow this is much more work than fun (14hrs or so days, 7 days a week for 5 months is a lot of work). But I was grateful for all the new experiences, people and places to be seen. I remember living in Saudi Arabia feeling invisible but thinking how lovely everyone was, not like the media says. I remember living in Switzerland wondering if I would ever get back to see my family and country during Covid and yet so grateful to have the internet to celebrate mums 70 on facetime with loved ones around the world. The best part was she took the call with only a towel after a shower thinking it was only my brother or I. Birthday suit specials for the 70th (She’s gonna love me so much right now ?. The laughter in that moment will always bring joy and heart warming feelings. And now I live in Thailand, one of the most overwhelming moves I have had but also the most beautiful reminder of how everything is enough when we are grateful and nothing is enough when we are not. Warm weather doesn’t make a great life but a warm heart and mind always does.
Every day I am reminded that not having gratitude can make even the most grandest things not enough and having gratitude can make the most insignificant things magical.
When I look back through the memories of the last year alone, what comes to mind more than anything is the amazing humans I’ve met and shared time with.
It’s always been a gift to see the world but the biggest gift is to meet so many wonderful humans with big hearts from all walks of life.
My heart sometimes feels lonely being away from my homeland and or so many good friends and family across the big wide world. I often feel confused and misunderstood too, like I do not fit in.
Then my heart holds space for gratitude and feels super blessed for all the magic souls I’ve been blessed to walk side by side with in this life.
All of us have heard it — “Life is a journey” — so many times. It’s not a singular journey though. Every person has a very individual and unique experience, a different journey start, middle and end – itineraries to travel. However, it’s a journey that we must learn to marinate in, cherish and treasure. Everyone has a different meaning to their journey as well. Life’s journey is filled with roadblocks and achievements but we must savour every bit and those we meet.
If this last year has taught me anything big it is these things:
-Gratitude is everything.
-The greatest part of a road trip isn’t arriving at your destination. It’s all the wild stuff that happens along the way. The unplanned and unexpected.
-So often the longest journey we make is the distance from our heads to our hearts.
-The people you meet truly are the best parts that make our journeys all worth it.
-That we are our own worst enemy’s or best friends and choosing the right side makes all the difference.
-If we can’t change our circumstances we must change our thinking.
– That those that hurt us are hurting humans, they are doing their best. Just like we are! -Forgiveness is always the key to keeping our hearts full with love and compassion beating in them.
– Don’t take life too seriously and learn to laugh at yourself, when you laugh at yourself you are free.
– Everything is music.
So here’s to the journey ahead and all the wonders yet to be experienced and seen. I look forward to them! The best is yet to come as they say
Thank you all from near and far for being the best parts of my journey that makes my heart sing and remember it’s all worth it
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