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March 28, 2024

Feeling Loved, Valued & Prioritized.

 

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Practicing humility and putting aside my ego is more important than ever right now in this present moment.

It’s important for me to show myself love, value, and give myself priority if I’m going to share those things with my partner, family, and friends.

How do I get there?

Five months ago, I would’ve had no clue. I was lost and confused about who I was, where I was going, and I really didn’t care. I had almost fully lost touch with myself and the world around me, my partner, my family, and my spirituality. I became complacent until my heart and soul awakened and said, “No more!”

I had enough of procrastination. I had enough of not listening to myself and my partner. I was bored of my excuses and ready to do something with my life. I started by showing myself presence, discipline, and allowing my natural energy to flow to these things.

I worked on my body to show myself how much I appreciated and loved myself. I started daily yoga, a daily workout, eating healthy, sobriety, and self-care in the form of solo dates, long salt and magnesium baths, and time set aside for me to enjoy myself through reading, writing, blogging, journaling, playing music, and sitting with my thoughts. I was feeling loved; most importantly, it was self-love.

I went from 208 pounds to 165 in three months, and I’m still going strong with everything I listed above. Self-care and love is the first step to sitting in my own power and finding myself. It has propelled me toward more goals as it has developed discipline and a deep love and appreciation for my health and my body; without those things, life wouldn’t be possible.

I’m feeling a deep sense of value and worth through all of this physical transformation and even more so from my emotional and spiritual changes.

How do I value myself more though?

I’ve been practicing saying “no” more than I used to. I’ve been reading about setting healthy boundaries within myself and with others around me, following through with my wants and needs, and expressing my feelings and emotions no matter what. This may sound selfish, but creating a sense of value within myself is super important if I want to see value in others and make them feel valued too.

Challenging all the negative thoughts, emotions, and feelings every time they come up has been a difficult task. I’ve chosen to break these habits and replace them with positive self-talk and affirmations and a strong will to tell them there’s no room for them in my mind anymore. Repeatedly reaffirming in the mirror, out loud in the car, inside my mind, or however else in that particular moment, that I am in control of myself and I am worthy. I’m kind to myself and patient.

I’m overflowing with positivity to create new paths for information to travel inside of me. Every second a negative thought comes in, I recognize it and remind myself that’s no longer acceptable, and I replace it with a positive thought. This is self-empowerment and I won’t stop. If I want to find who I truly am, I can’t stop. I’m making myself a priority and choosing to become the best version of myself.

Half a year ago, I would have never thought I’d be here. I would’ve hoped to be here, but I didn’t have the motivation. I was bitter and resentful and I was blinded by ego, fear, and insecurity. All things that will not allow me to love, value, and prioritize myself. In order to do these things, the ego must be set aside and I must practice humility.

How do I do that?

I’ve learned that becoming more open to learning from others, accepting feedback, recognizing mine and others’ strengths and limitations are a good start. Also, listening to those around me so they feel heard and maybe even putting their needs before my own while maintaining confidence and competence in my own needs.

Owning my mistakes and taking accountability shows humility not only to myself but others around me. Taking responsibility of my actions and receiving guiding words or criticisms positively and graciously really works wonders for reprogramming the negative self-talk and the old ego habits of excuses and irresponsibility.

Showing appreciation and gratitude for myself and everyone else around me from the little things to the big things has been building more humility and respect inside me.

Becoming humble isn’t easy for me; there’s 40 years of habits that I’m slowly dismantling. I must reassure myself daily that this work is my path and I will continue no matter what. Yes there are walls and tons of obstacles in the way. Mental breakdowns, emotional roller coasters, and even profound experiences followed by a lull of energy from enduring such powerful realizations of change.

I can’t give up. What would I go back to? Complacency? Ego? Irresponsibly wandering through life feeling bitter toward everyone and everything including myself for not doing what my spirit is guiding me to do? Yeah, no thanks.

I’d rather feel loved, valued, and prioritized. I’d rather share those things with my partner, family, friends, and all those around me. For showing another that you hold the space to love, value, and prioritize your own life, you can show them that you love, value, and prioritize them too.

This is the humble path, and I’m finding it.

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