What is it about dads?
Some say fatherhood is about providing for the family financially. When the roof is leaking and when the utility bills pile up, a good dad will be able to write the checks. Some also say that being a father is about being present. When the kids have soccer games, visits from the tooth fairy or homework piling up, dad should be there, encouraging and comforting and, at times, challenging. Still others say being a good dad is about being a strong leader. A father should protect and provide, defend and stand guard.
A good dad is a strong, “servant-hearted” dad.
So, what does it take to be a good father? The answer: all of the above, and then some. To put it another way, it’s pretty easy to mess up being a dad. Dads are pillows, punching bags, leaders, servants, friends, providers, encouraging, guard dogs, counselors, husband—the list goes on.
In short, when you become a dad, your identity changes. You have a new purpose. You can no longer live for yourself. You now live for others. Your world is broadened, enriched, challenged. Even if the parents are divorced, good dads get down with their kids. They are committed.
Good dads can’t make one-night stands and martini bars their priority any more. They live for their families. It is a high call and it’s no surprise that it’s so easy to mess it up. We expect a lot from our fathers. And our fathers can so easily let us down. Most of us can quickly recall our memories with our dads, and they can be either painful or joyful, but rarely are they neutral.
Becoming a good dad is like making fine wine. It takes trial and error, a lot of hard work and most of all: time. Lots of time. It takes a lot of time to love someone their whole life. It takes a lifetime. Dads are in it for the long haul.
Sherri Rosen is now living in Harlem, New York. She has had her own publicity business for 12 years giving a powerful voice to people who are doing good things in the world. She writes on her own blog at www.SherriRosen.com, www.GateKeepersPost.com, www.Triiibes.com, www.Examiner.com and www.TheGoodMenProject.com.
Editor: Seychelles Pitton
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July’s Full Moon in Capricorn: The Heart wants what it Wants. The 4 Stages of a Good Divorce. How to Love a Woman who Scares You. Our Soulmates are Rarely Who We Expect. I Still Think of You. Men, Let’s Stop Fooling Ourselves: Size Matters. To the One Who Tried to Break Me. An Open Letter to the Fixers. How your Stored Memories in the Amygdala can lead to PTSD. How My Sister’s Death Transformed my Self-Perception.